Hi there,
I would like to welcome you to the forums and acknowledge that it is not easy to reach out and open up, so thank you for doing that. You've done the right thing and I can see how you want to improve. I can relate to your post and the frustration of just wanting to get better and simultaneously being scared and struggling. Anxiety is such a weight. I'm sorry to hear about the way your friends are treating you. You absolutely don't need to hang out with them if you feel like they are making you feel worse. I was wondering if you have anyone else in your life you can talk to about anxiety with like a family member you trust?
I also wanted to ask if you have tried some counselling or doing so now? Just in case, I'll leave the BeyondBlue number here if you would like to speak to a counsellor: 1300 22 4636
I want to list a few things that have helped me in anxiety and I hope you will try them too and see how you go. I have found meditation and deep breathing to be so helpful and it's definitely a worthwhile skill to learn as it helps to calm down your nervous system and think more clearly. Also, repeating to myself over and over 'I am not my thoughts'. It's so hard when you have a negative thought spiral like how you mentioned you feel like you're annoying and ugly. In these moments, I try to replace these thoughts with something positive like 'I am beautiful, I know I'm loved by my family, I am worthy', etc. Gratitude and writing your thoughts out as a brain dump is really helpful too. I hope you find something that works for you.
I promise you are not annoying or ugly and you have so much worth and potential. I see you do want to get better and are working towards that by reaching out on here. I hope you feel content today and a little lighter. Reach out here anytime, you are always welcome.
Wishing you well,
PsychDiaries
