Sudden morning anxiety

[Teacher9]

I've had anxiety in the past and it's due to being on call for work. I overcame that and just last week I woke up with the same awful feelings. Tight stomach, restless, tired but edgy. I dry retch and my mind goes crazy thinking of things I wasn't even worried about. Now I usually get this a week leading up to school(my work) going back but I still have a month before that.
My 3 year old has been sick and I've been having broken sleep with her and she's up and running for the day at 4am which I can't handle at the moment. Luckily my husband is off and has been doing mornings with her.
I just hate this feeling in the morning, by lunch I'm fine!!
Last week my husband was talking about his past and I learnt about ex girlfriends and too much info which hurt. I know this is playing on my mind and I've told him that. Not sure why I'd be anxious over this though, I thought anxiety was to do with the future. I don't know why I'm getting hurt by relationships he had like 20 years ago. I think my subconscious got rattled because I thought I knew all about his past. Plus it's irrational to get upset at someone's past because most people do. (husband my first serious relationship though).
Ive booked to see gp Thursday to get some bloods checked and discuss my morning anxiety. If it continues I'll try get in earlier. Just wanted to vent👍😔

[sunnyl20]

Hey Teacher9,

I'm really sorry to hear about how much anxiety you are experiencing at the moment, it sounds like it is pretty distressing and overwhelming. It is great that you feel able to vent on here though - please know that this is a safe and confidential space where you can do that whenever you feel you need. Writing out what is going on can be so helpful to get it off your chest and out of your system, even if it feels like it only offloads that burden you're carrying a little. I'm really glad that you have got an appointment booked with your GP - I hope they are able to offer you some advice and support, as I feel like you cannot work long-term with the distress you are currently having around work. Being on-call for work can be very stressful, especially the uncertainty of it, please know that you are not alone in feeling that. Anxiety is not always to do with the future, it is common to worry about past events/experiences and ruminate on what could've been, on what should've happened and for past events to affect your anxiety about future things too.

Please do not hesitate to talk more if/when you feel up to it.

Take care.

[quirkywords]

Teacher

thanks for your post which I and others reading can relate to.

I have never been good in the morning and when I was a casual teacher on call I would wait by the phone in days before mobile and I would worry if it rang and sorry if it didn’t,.

I agree with sunny that writing is useful as it helped me to accept I was worried in the morning but was often ok by recess,

I don’t think it is irrational to get upset by your husbands past but if you think about the present and your past together it will reassure you.

There are other threads where people have tips about anxiety and there are even apps that help.

If you want let us know how you are going.!