I have dealt with anxiety problems for a very long time. I saw a psychologist during my teen years for depression & anxiety which seemed to help one but not the other. Things seemed to get better enough for me to manage on my own as I got older, but recently they've been getting worse and worse.
I have a lot of responsibilities this year, have to do things (like chair meetings etc.) that give me really bad panic attacks. I have dealt with panic attacks on a regular basis for a long time (usually go to the bathroom and wait in the stall for half an hour / longer if I'm at university or work for the heavy, noisy breathing and feeling like I'm going to pass out to stop) but they have been so bad recently I have started throwing up, and feel completely wrecked for the rest of the day (sometimes multiple days after). I'm at the end of my rope. They seem to come out of nowhere and there's nothing I can do to anticipate them or stop them from taking everything out of me when they happen.
I recently caught up with an old friend who I knew dealt with similar problems, and they told me they have had great success with short-term anxiety medication. From what they told me of their experiences with this as well as ongoing support from a psychologist, it seems like it would really help me. When these really bad ones hit it feels like the entire world is caving in, it feels like I'm dying. But I'm also too scared to talk to a doctor about this option for treatment because I'm scared of being seen as like a drug addict or something - as I have heard that people use this medication recreationally.
The thought of my doctor seeing me in that light makes me extremely anxious. I don't know what to do because I have tried so many things (cbt, several antidepressants, etc.) and nothing has helped. I feel like I can't continue the way I am but I'm worried about getting help.
Has anyone else dealt with a similar problem?
