Personal Training = Personal Hell

[EverdeenKatniss]

Hi,

i am an overweight girl in her twenties, to go to the gym was a great, not to mention terrifying experience. To speak up and ask for a personal trainer was even harder, I was shy and embarrassed. I suffer from a major depressive disorder and anxiety issues.

 My trainer was unreliable and flakey, he cancelled often and never gave me what I paid for. I have chased him for three and a half weeks in seek of appointments, which he never replied.

 After finally getting hold of him and sending a frank, appropriate message seeking availability. Out of nowhere he replied stating this was purely professional and he believed he had given me the wrong idea and he would understand if I got another trainer. I was embarrassed and horrified because in honesty I never was suggestive or inns proprietor not to mention interested in him.

 The problem I face with my anxiety is when I am upset I obsess, I can't stop thinking about an issue (like one mentioned above) I am sad and sullen, I am basically haunted by the emotions I am faced with. My family want me to stay at the gym, I am so hurt and embarrassed.

I am unsure how to cope with the feelings I have, as to anyone else what I am upset about is not a big deal. I am struggling with the defeat and embarrassment I am feeling. 

I decided to join this site to seek advice and support as I feel alone and mortified. I am obsessing over this, my anxiety is suffocating me.

Thank You,

J

[Neil_1]

Dear J

Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you so much for coming here and providing your post.  I also like your name you’ve chosen and the pic;  my daughter is a big fan of series of the Hunger Games books and movies.

May I say first up, “Congrats” to you for getting to a gym – as you’ve mentioned, it was a major experience for you and you know what, you’re not on your own with this.  I know of others who have mentioned this to me over time. 

What did annoy me and disappoint me though was the attitude of your ‘so-called’ personal trainer – someone like that can impact badly on a person going along wishing to get into the fitness side of things.  I would be almost to the point of reporting this person for a lack of duty of care to you – that is appalling for how you were treated.

May I ask, is it a large gym that you’ve chosen to go too?  I ask that, as are there many personal trainers who operate out of it?   OR are there other gyms in your area/location?  Likewise, are there other personal trainer operations nearby?

I would be definitely not having anything to do with this other person and would be trying to pursue another p.t. and in the first instance chatting to them about what it is you are definitely wishing to achieve;  what can they provide for you;  how many days a week you’d like;  whether or not they can advise, assist and support you in possible diets/meal plans and also along the lines of what you’re hoping to achieve, you’d be wanting them to assist you with creating goals for you and working with you to achieve them.

I say achieve “them” as you don’t want to have just ONE goal – the ultimate at the end of the rainbow goal;   sure it might be there for further down the track, but along the way, you’ve got to set up a whole stack of little goals, that can be reached and achieved.  Kind of tick them off as you go and progress further.

But it all starts with a single step forward.

I hope we can help and support you through this.

Kind regards

Neil