Panick attacks: Which reality is real, am I a hypochondriac?

notquiteright · ‎14-10-2019

I'm not quite sure where to start with this one, a bit of background I suppose. 21m. I've been struggling with anxiety for a number of years now but only just started seeking treatment after everything sort of came to a head following a severe panic attack. I first started having these feelings when I started high-school, the anxiety was so bad that it prevented me from eating properly for a good couple of months. Then around Year 10 it came back with a vengeance, this time with an element of social anxiety thrown in (getting acne certainly didn't help there). I'd frequently have what I now know to be panic attacks where I found it difficult to breathe properly. I don't quite know how to describe the sensation other than it was like drowning. I'd feel hungry for air but my breathing would be shallow and stilted. Usually these attacks were quite brief, but on occasion they would intensify and I'd start to experience unpleasant tingling sensations across my body. Fast forward to University and these attacks got a lot worse and a lot more frequent. For the first two years I'd wake up with a feeling of dread and could barely hold down my breakfast. Once I even threw up on the bus trip into campus due to these sensations... The panic attacks got so bad I frequently felt like I was going to pass out, and on a few occasions I actually fell asleep in lectures due to exhaustion. Despite the anxiety I managed to do alright academically, and landed a programming job in the city. I'm running out of characters so I'll try keep this brief. I had a major panic attack after gym before work (was hoping getting in shape would help my anxiety). I thought I was dying. I got the instructor to call an ambulance. My hands were shaking and my body felt like lead. Three hospital visits since then, have had my heart monitored and blood tests taken, all within normal ranges. When my anxiety gets bad I start to fixate over the event and wonder if I really did have a stroke of some kind and my anxiety has been misdiagnosed, as when I'm in this headspace I can't think straight, can barely talk and can only manage a hobbled walk. Even now I'm feeling anxious and my hands cramp up as I type and I get stuck thinking about I should say. But in an hour or two I'll look back and think about how ridiculous I was being, and that there's nothing wrong and I'm not some cripple on deaths door. I don't know which reality to believe, I want the obsessions to go away. Anyone else been through this?

therising · ‎15-10-2019

Hi notquiteright

The human body can definitely be a quirky sort of thing, yet highly intelligent at the same time. Saying that it can be a challenge to master is an understatement.

I have a friend who experiences overwhelming panic attacks and she has found one method for coping with them that works well. Whilst she has been advised to 'ground herself' during the episodes, she actually does the opposite. Instead of bringing herself back to reality or back down to earth she imagines rising above the situation she's in:

When she feels a panic attack coming on, she doesn't fight it, instead she'll comfortably take a seat and imagine herself as a bird, rooted to the ground (taking in an overload of sensory information). She imagines breaking free of the roots that hold her, rising into the air and slowly and deeply moving her wings (in her mind). If she's at home, she'll physically move her arms up and down for this. She'll hold her arms outstretched and with a deep and slow in breath, she'll lift them up and with the out breath she'll move them down to her side. This visualisation or action helps her slow her breathing and leads her to free herself from the the physical and mental overload that comes with panic attacks. So, in summary, she doesn't fight it, she takes flight and this frees her. This gives a whole new meaning to 'fight/flight/freeze'. She finds it also helps her conserve energy and she doesn't feel so drained afterwards. Because she finds it difficult to deal with judgement from others, noisy environments and a host of other things, taking flight helps her 'rise above' these situations. Afterwards, she'll give herself a mental pat on the back for making it through, mastering her mind and body and for having such a great imagination to boot.

This all sounds a little too simplistic but often it is the simple things that make a difference. My friend is actually managing to gradually reduce the amount of episodes as well as the intensity. She's even decided to join guided meditation sessions/classes, where they encourage breath work and imagination. Getting in sync with the natural intelligence of her body is her number 1 goal. Getting in sync means the body goes from being the enemy to the wise and trusted friend, leading us to natural courses of action which serve us in a number of ways.

Take care 🙂

Alana_H · ‎15-10-2019

Hi,

Thanks for your post. It sounds like you have done really well in spite of these debilitating panic attacks so well done. To me it most definitely does sound like you are having panic attacks, and it can be really normal to think that you're having a stroke or a heart attack, it comes back to our brain not knowing whats going on and it trying to make suggestions (often super unhelpful suggestions) about why we are feeling this way, it's that fight or flight response kicking in telling your body you're in danger when you aren't.

I wonder if you have tried anything for these panic attacks before? Any therapy or techniques like the great one suggested by therising? Panic attacks are treatable and sometimes its just about trying some different things that may work for you, many people find that seeing a psychologist, especially one that specialises in Panic Disorder, can reduce the symptoms significantly.

Also a really practical thing you can during a panic attack is called rebreathing. When we are sucking in heaps of air quickly, like in a panic attack, our body can get overloaded with oxygen, by cupping our hands over our mouth and take deep breaths we "rebreath" some of the carbon dioxide, this can even things out and stop those really dizzy overwhelming feelings (with the bonus of having something to focus on). This isn't about stopping the panic attacks but like therising said, just riding them out in a less upsetting way.

Let us know if there are things you've tried or if you want some more strategies or just jump back on for a chat.

Alana_H

notquiteright · ‎17-10-2019

Thank-you both for your posts, I really appreciate the fact that someone out there in the great ether took the time to offer some advice. It might sound lame, but it means a lot to me. I read the responses yesterday but put off replying. I wasn't in the best state of mind and when I'm not feeling too great I tend to catastrophize my situation. I had a wall of text ready to go but upon reflection, realized that maybe it wasn't as bad as all that. That's the trouble with my anxiety, it's hard to know what's real. The feelings are real enough but often their causes aren't (at least I'm pretty sure they aren't!).

I tried the method you outlined therising in dealing with panic attacks, I think it did help somewhat. I've tried the mindfulness practice that's been recommended to me by my psychologist a few times before, it hasn't been that effective. Always looking to try new techniques. I like the concept of being 'in sync', I'm trying not to get angry at my body when it doesn't do what I want it to, but instead work with it.

The sensations used to terrify me and caused me to believe I had developed some sort of severe neurological disorder. I know now that they're just the products of anxiety. The problem is that when I get frustrated about a small symptom (a tension in my arms that makes them feel heavy), I start to obsess which only exacerbates the symptoms. Then I start to get angry that I can't control my body and the positive feedback loop spirals out of control 😞

I try my best not to think about it but I just long for the day when these sensations go away. And that's the paradox, the more I give attention to these feelings and dwell on them probably the longer it'll take.

I'm trying to keep myself occupied. I've learnt that so long as I'm actively engaged in something, I don't experience the attacks (even persistent symptoms like finger cramps go away). The problem is.. my new work isn't engaging (just started, not a lot of projects), friends are busy it being exam time and all, and I'm generally loathed to do something on my own. I've signed up for a gym session Sunday with a PT. Slightly terrified because I had my last major panic attack after gym, but GP has assured me I have nothing to fear if I take it slow and that I'm in good health (physically at least). Here's hoping.

What stuff should I try to engage in? I wouldn't have described myself as socially anxious or self aware before, but in my current state I find it hard to get out.

Alana_H · ‎23-10-2019

Hi,

Thanks for your reply, I'm sorry it takes so long for me to get back to you but I don't get online too much. It sounds like you are taking really proactive steps to try and combat the anxiety, even though you'll have bad days, I think that persistence is the best tactic in dealing with anxiety, and being open to trying new things, which definitely comes across in your post.

I suppose that something else you can try would be keeping a sort of "thought diary", that is writing all your anxious thoughts down as you have them and then looking at them later and sort of "examining" them. You can do this is a thought diary like the one attached below. It's about looking at the thought from another perspective and finding a new way to think about it and then using this thought to "fight off" or replace the anxious thought the next time it comes up. This might be really hard at the start because your brain is so used to activating those anxious thoughts, but like muscles, the more you train your brain to move towards more helpful thoughts, the easier it will be to automatically go to them instead of the anxious one. This takes time and perseverance but it can be really helpful with panic/anxiety. If you are seeing a therapist they can help you with it too.

Otherwise just keep going you sound like you're doing some really positive things in your life, and although your job is unstimulating right now remember it's not forever, just work on other aspects of your life, then when you're ready you can find the job you'll love.

Feel free to let us know how you're going with things.

Alana_H

(https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/docs/ThoughtRecordSheet7.pdf)

b_abbey · ‎24-10-2019

Hi there. Yes I went through periods of having panic attacks, and was admitted to hospital twice. I too wondered whether I was misdiagnosed and all that you say. I found some help by reading a book about breathing by a physiotherapist (years ago) - best little book I ever read in the fact that I no longer get panic attacks, as now I know how to stop them! I hope this helps you too. When we panic, we actually over breathe, breathing out too much carbon dioxide, and so the levels in our blood become low - which then triggers us to over breathe (vicious cycle in other words). Our breathing rate is actually controlled by the level of carbon dioxide in the blood. So - how to fix it - hold your breath as soon as you feel like you are going into panic mode. It's hard for the first two or three breaths, but once we manage to do it, the levels of carbon dioxide begin to increase again in our blood, which slows down our breathing. Viola! It's the same as breathing into a paper bag, which works well too. I hope this helps.