Need some help with Anxiety leading up to a big overseas trip! Please help/share your strategies!

[Jules2511]

Hi everyone,

 I'm set to go to Europe  in 9 days and recently my anxiety has become really bad with all my thoughts about the flight.

The background is that I'm someone who loves to travel, however starting about 7 years ago I've been really anxious when I'm flying. I've made several big overseas trips during this time, however I've always had my girlfriend with me and just having someone to talk to has made it that much easier to overcome the anxiety. This time however she's already gone overseas a week ago and I will be meeting her over there as soon as I land. 

 I've managed to break my fear down to one main thing, which is just being afraid of being afraid and not being able to calm myself down. Once the plane is in the air I'm usually ok, but its just the anticipation that is freaking me out! 

 If someone has a similar experience and has any tips, please please let me know as I need some strategies for dealing with the panic that I feel in those situations. I know that everything will be ok, and I am so excited to go, but the feelings of anxiety are really overpowering me at the moment.

 Thanks everyone!

[Jacko777]

Hi Jules2511,

Welcome to the beyond blue forums, I am glad you have posted and I am sure there will be many ideas for you soon.

A few things have worked for me in the past, firstly, I make sure I am not getting excitement and nerves mixed up. If I start to get butterflies, I assure myself that it is excitement and shift my focus to the positive. If I choose to take a flight, I may have to remind myself that a plane is the only way to get to where I want to go. I don't like to lose energy to something that is out of my control, once I board I am in the hands of the crew and I choose to LOVE the miracle of flight and the people that make it happen. I find that I cannot have love and fear in my heart at the same time.

Do you or can you meditate? It will help you to control your focus in the coming weeks. Every time you start to feel anxious, practice shifting your focus to the positive, search the web for some photos and info of where you are going or change your thinking all together to another subject, don't let it fester.

You are not alone Jules! Europe hey, lucky duck!!

Jacko

[geoff]

dear Jules, thanks for posting your comment and welcome to the site.

Your fear of flying is not something that people don't worry about, as I'm sure that even the frequent flyer would also have concerns, but there are a few things to do which may help you.

Think of the joy of meeting your girlfriend who is already over there and what she's got to tell you and show you, and play some music that you both like.

Get to the airport early, book in and then walk around getting familiar with all the facilities.

If you can try and get an aisle seat, practice your breathing and maybe some mediation and there is some medication which is available by script which will calm your nerves, I believe it's the same as what people take for sea sickness.

Good luck. Geoff.

[Jules2511]

Thanks for your responses Jacko and Geoff!

 Yesterday I tried just slowing my breathing when I was feeling panic and by being persistent and fighting the urge to give up when the feelings come back in waves I was able to calm myself down and get rid of the anxiety I've been feeling all day.

 Also just like you've both mentioned I've been trying to stay positive and spend more time thinking about all the positive things (like having 5 weeks off work!!!)

 I really appreciate your responses, yesterday I was really having a bad time and just having somewhere to reach out was great. Big thanks to Beyond blue for creating this resource.

[Doolhof]

Hi Jules,

So you are off to Europe! Congratulations. Hope you have an excellent time. Catching up with your girlfriend there will be areal bonus.

How are you getting to the airport? Are friends or family taking you or are you travelling there alone? If friends are going, can they hang around for a while until you are called to your flight?

If not, then do as Geoff and Jacko777 have suggested and find ways to calm yourself and work on distractions as well.

I don't particularly like any part of flying, but know it is necessary. I pray a lot! I also do Sudoku puzzles, take an interesting book to the airport to keep me distracted, have a chat with anyone who looks like they might be up for a bit of conversations, read the paper and try to think peaceful thoughts.

Maybe you could start thinking positive thoughts about your journey, play over in your mind how it will be catching up with your girlfriend, being in Europe, and experiencing everything there together.

Put things in place now to help you cope with that time at the airport. Practise some breathing techniques and relaxation skills.

Hope some of this helps.

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools or Lauren  

[Jacko777]

That is terrific that you are able to take control of your breathing and calm yourself down Jules2511. Some times it will be easy and some times you will need to focus harder on your slow breathing, as you have. I am really happy for you, great stuff mate.

Some times when I am faced with a situation that might make me nervous I adopt the mindset...'Meh! I do this stuff every day' I play it down and I remind myself that if someone else can do it, so can I.

Jacko

[Doolhof]

Hi Jules,

Thanks for sharing with us how much you have gained through trying the breathing technique. It really is amazing how we can so easily control our brains and change our circumstances!

Well done to you.

Positive thinking helps heaps as well doesn't it! Changing our thoughts from "how am I going to cope", to "this is going to be fun" can make so much difference.

Five weeks in Europe, excellent. We will be waiting to hear a report when you get back!!

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools or Lauren

[Jules2511]

Hi everyone,

 Thanks again for your responses. Still going well only 4 days until I leave!

 I actually spoke to someone at Beyondblue when I was in full panic mode and they basically put everything into perspective for me.

I've just moved house 3 weeks ago, I've been worried how our dog will go living with my mum while we're away, I'm going to propose to my girlfriend on this trip and it's the first time in a long time I've travelled on my own. As the lady put it, "thats enough to send someone without anxiety into a panic"! 

 But yeah just like you've mentioned I've managed to focus on the good parts and that has helped push the panic away completely (for now). 

 Again I really can't thank you all enough for just responding to my original post because I was feeling so lost and unsure and just knowing someone else could understand the feelings was immensely helpful.

[JessF]

Nothing like an exciting countdown to a great trip! Speaking for myself, I hate the transit part of travelling and the leadup. I get very anxious, and my moods fluctuate a lot during the actual trip.

But here's the thing, the travelling part is such a tiny part of your overall trip and it will be over with soon enough. Think of it as the annoying load of washing you have to do so you have clean clothes to go out and paint the town red. 

Best of luck with your proposal and I look forward to hearing how it all went!