Hi Saltbush Boy,
The reason why you find understanding and compassion in these forums is that we all face/have faced the same issues. The one you mention is common to most of us in mainstream life. We refer to the mind as "ours" when in reality it often owns us. A muso recently shared with me a new song he wrote, addressed to his own mind. It is titled "Shut The ..bleep .. Up".
We waste a lot of time and energy inventing scary scenarios (which seldom come to happen), reliving long past conversations, what was said, should have been said etc...Meanwhile Life goes on and we miss much of it.
There are techniques to help reclaim some measure of control but they demand patient persistence and don't work instantly, at least not long-term. We're all different so a particular technique may work for some but not for others. One that helped me get out of a restless mind is first focusing on the physical center, just above the navel. Martial artists call this the "seat of inner power". Bringing the mind back there, you'll feel the spine automatically lengthen, freeing the nerve endings rooted there, drop the shoulders. Returning there whenever the mind starts wandering in negative directions then finding a more positive thought, happy memory etc... tempting the mind to dwell on that instead. Repeating stubbornly as soon as is strays again. It takes time for the brain to adjust to a new pattern but habits that make us feel good are adopted more easily. Like looking for beauty around us. It is everywhere, but restless mental activity blinds us to it. Children's laughter, light playing on water, a smile, a movement, a pattern, a colour combination...Find it and engage as many senses as possible (smell the rose, touch it, feel it, study its shape etc...). Whatever can attract your attention and keep it for a while. You cannot stop thoughts but you can change their focus.
Many coping/distracting mechanisms can be found throughout these forums. Navigating them in search of tricks and tips may also help canalize thoughts where you want them instead of where they're trying to entice you !
Have a bit of distracting fun.
