Lost hope and need a friend

[Music_Freak]

I'm a girl...Narelle, 36, from Adelaide, single, unemployed, cat mum...um, what else...I probably shouldn't reveal so much, but may as well be honest, right?

I have both anxiety and depression, and am a pessimist. I have lost all my "friends" because of this and feel worthless and like giving up. I have a GP and a psychologist, but I'm not even sure the therapy (I've been going for a few years now) is working for me.

I have two favourite bands (Sixx:A.M. and Halestorm. True Violet is another on the top of my list right now) and I write band fan fiction. In the past I have depended on these two things to help me through life, but now that they're not really working, I decided to try here.

I just hope to have people to talk to, and maybe make some friends.

[Emmy.]

I think I may have to purchase some of those songs that I liked 🙂 Mommy I am Sorry makes me think of my mum too. She passed two years ago. Its hard isn't it 😞

How have you been?? xx

[Music_Freak]

Not great today...pretty much waiting for today to end 😞

Not sure how I'm going to face tomorrow

[themadchatter]

Hello Narelle sorry to hear you feel that you lost hope and need a friend. I see you live in Adelaide. I live in there to. If you need someone to count on or talk to you can always talk to me

[Emmy.]

Sorry to hear that you're not great 😞 (sending some big hugs your way). Have you been up to much today?? Here if you want to chat more. xx

[Music_Freak]

Thanks for commenting. I've done nothing today. I was meant to volunteer today, but woke up with a headache, so I didn't go...which didn't help my down mood.

I have to go and deal with my job network place after being on an exemption and I'm going to struggle getting out of bed.

I was also dumb enough to pay for a MYOB course that was meant to help the job search, like other courses I've done (nothing's helped. I have zero confidence so everything is pointless) and I'm now behind in it, so that's added to stress on top of having no money (long story, but my dad lives with me and doesn't pay the one bill I ask him to, so it's left for me to pay. (I've given up because he just doesn't care.)

So that's my life...

[Emmy.]

I've not done anything today either - some days are going to be like that though and we need to not put too much pressure on ourselves when this happens. Especially if you had a headache too - that can knock you about.

Where do you do volunteer work (if you want to answer that).

I think you should be proud of yourself for getting out there and doing an MYOB course. Could you perhaps talk with one of the teachers about how you're feeling, perhaps there's a way you could have an extension on any works due (sorry if this is not relevant but just a suggestion). Be proud that you're giving it a go.

Gaining employment can be tough, but try to keep positive. Sometimes when we put less pressure on ourselves things fall into place. I'm sure you'd be an asset to any workplace 🙂

Sorry to hear your Dad hasn't helped with the bill. What does he say when you try to discuss it with him?

Thinking of you hun xx

[Music_Freak]

I do admin with The Smith Family, they've been nice enough about my many absences, but I know I'm a let down.

I've sent an email about an extension, but haven't heard back. I've got until the beginning of October so I'm hoping I can knuckle down over the weekend and try and catch up/get ahead.

I'm trying to be proud of myself, but I keep ruining everything.

My dad works for my sister's family business full time (when he actually goes to work) and always complains about having no money, but he just doesn't want to spend money when there's beer to buy. He's just a joke, really

[Emmy.]

The admin work must be very rewarding. You're not a let down.

Could you perhaps give yourself little goals to achieve with the course. Break it down and it may not seem quite so daunting.

You sound like you're a good daughter hun. Could you talk with your sister about the issue with your Dad? Maybe you could all agree on arrangement where bills are paid first then the beers are purchased?

[themadchatter]

Offers a hug to you. Keep your chin up

[Music_Freak]

I thought of this, but she just says that she has nothing to do with the pays

So she's no help, but no one helps me. I've done everything on my own since my mum died - I can't even keep friends.

I'm ready to write letters to them all and die. I just can't do any of this anymore.​