How do you explain anxiety to others who don't experience it?

[CMF]

I have been having bouts of anxiety of late. Nothing new for me, it comes and goes, sometimes but here are triggers/reasons , sometimes I'm just anxious and overthinking. My partner of four months is a very positive and happy person and has never had anxiety. He is supportive, caring, offers reassurance and does all the right things and encourages me to just get it all out and tell him how I'm feeling and why. but I know he doesn't fully understand it. He asked recently 'What does it feel,like to have anxiety?' I explained I worry, overthink, heart races, feel hot, panic and that I can't control how it, but I could see he couldn't relate.

How do you get people to understand and relate to how you feel?

CMF x

[Rabbit33]

Hi CMF,
Not everyone experiences anxiety, and anxiety can come in different forms..
General Anxiety Disorder (G.A.D)
Social Anxiety
Phobia Anxiety
And it can be a symptom of several mental health conditions. It may be worth having a look through the BeyondBlue website as it has very useful and resourceful information for people dealing with and people caring for. Below is a link for facts and types of anxiety. Hope this helps. 🙂

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety/types-of-anxiety

[therising]

Hi CMF

Sounds like you have a wonderful supportive partner, which is an absolute bonus in life.

May sound a little weird but I wonder if he understands how cars work, in order for him to better relate to anxiety. I offer the following analogy:

When you put your foot down on the accelerator, this action releases more petrol (aka chemistry) into the system. The increase of chemistry/petrol speeds up the firing and before you know it the whole system is working harder and faster, all through the pressure on the pedal. I'm pretty sure I've got it right, in a bit of a nutshell.

Personally, I had no idea this is how a car goes faster, until I asked my husband to explain it to me (based on the idea of relating it to the brain in some way).

So the question becomes 'What leads us to 'put our foot down' (in the first place), in the case of the chemistry and firing within anxiety?' I wish I had the answer. This much I do know: As the brain is triggered, it releases chemistry which signals things to speed up. Once the signal has hit our sympathetic nervous system (our fight, flight, freeze system) BAM, our heart is off and racing along with other aspects of our self. Rabbit33 offers great resources when it comes to discovering strategies which can help 'take the foot off the pedal'.

It would be amusing to find that your partner works in the car industry. Even if he has some understanding in regard to mechanics, this could make for some interesting conversation.

Personally, I love coming to better understand my vehicle. Knowing what makes us humans tick is a liberating experience. Epigenetics in particular is a truly fascinating topic, with Dr Joe Dispenza being a legend in this area. 'Becoming Supernatural' is one of my favourite books of his and definitely worth a read. He seriously simplifies epigenetics, neuroscience and quantum physics (aka body, mind and spirit) for the lay person. Sounds a bit complex but the way he does simplify it all is what I believe makes him such a great author.

Take care CMF

[Skary Bill]

Hi CMF,

I suspect my answer will be somewhat specific to my own experience. But for me, the symptoms manifest in a very physical way. The tightness of the chest etc.. Most people have some natural aversion/caution with heights. So I think the most effective explanation I've found was to ask someone if they ever stood too close to a very high edge. And if so, did their body and mind tell them in one or more ways to stop or step back?

Most of the people I've asked could relate to that in some way and from there I explore with them the concept of ways that our bodies tell us something is "just not right". Then I ask them to consider what it might be like if those natural self preserving instincts stuck around for an hour.. A day.. A week. Or just seemed like they might never go away. There's no visible edge to step back from and no amount of self reassurance will make it ok.

Hope that is useful. And I hope you're feeling good.

Bill.