Full head

[Haveachat2u]

Hi well I have adhd and Aspergers. I live with constant anxiety, depression, ocd, social anxiety and a few other things. I have been told why don’t you just get a psychologist or whatever. Well I work 3 casual jobs and study university part time. I don’t get time off to see a psychologist.

I was in a domestic violence situation. I left in January with the shirt on my back and two car loads of stuff. He got everything else. I was too afraid to take anything. He still tried to come after me. He hacked my accounts and I was forced to leave Facebook and I lost all my friends. I had to go to court to get my name off the lease because the realestate refused to take me off the lease even though by law they had to. I had to defend myself and do the bulk of the work myself because my caseworker only had a cert 4 in community services and had no idea what she was doing. I have been going through hell. I have had to buy new everything, start out fresh with everything!

I have just finished paying back the loan that I took out to pay his bond. He made me pay for just about everything. I’m getting back on my feet.

I struggle with sitting still in the classroom at university and not saying a word. I’m overwhelmed with sensory from everyone’s emotions as I am an empath. I struggle with keeping quiet. I have racing repeating thoughts constantly. The only way to stop the pain from the racing repeating thoughts is to say them out loud. There’s like this massive pressure in my brain that forces me to speak. I’m constantly putting my foot in it.

Im working like 60 to 70 hours this week plus doing university. I’m struggling to get everything done. I usually work about 40 hours per week but have cancelations at work so I was offered extra work by all employers instead this week. Before I knew it I was working these hours. I’m struggling to be honest. But the week is just about over thank god!

The good news is that I’m surviving after leaving my ex. Going through such a emotional trauma. I have anxiety about losing my jobs or mentally just not coping and snapping. But I still have my jobs, while I have made mistakes because I have never really worked before I was forced on Centrelink when I was 16. It has been hard leaving the safety of Centrelink. But I’m surviving and I’m earning more money then I have ever had in my life.

I worked 9 hours today and I’m about to go to bed so that I can work another 9 tomorrow. I’m so exhausted. I was just getting the words out of my head.

[YellowPoppy]

Hi have a chat,

You sound exhausted! I'm sorry your post has been overlooked!

It's fantastic that you got out of that relationship and that you're managing on your own - though it's obviously stressful and hard!

Could you speak to your uni about getting some support? I got an access plan from my uni (Vic uni) which was basically a file that informed my teachers about what was going on and gave me some freedom to manage my mental health as I needed to. Things like leaving the classroom if I felt overwhelmed. Or being able to use my phone if I needed to. Just a thought.


How are you going today, you said you have a 9 hour shift today, I hope you have a break tomorrow!

Hope to hear from you,

YellowPoppy

[Haveachat2u]

Hi yellow poppy,

i do have support at university, I have contacted the teachers and I play on my phone or draw pictures in class in stead of talking. I’m struggling today. I have a fever from the flu. I have 3 casual jobs and study part time. I got the results back for a assignment I got 24/40 so yes I passed but I’m disappointed in myself. I have anxiety about my marks for my other subject, will it be enough to pass?

I have never worked full time and studied part time before. Today is a 8 hour day of work. My shifts are broken up into 3 different shifts through out the day. I started at 6:15 this morning and finish at 8:30 tonight. Tomorrow I’m working 8 hours, Thursday 8 hours Friday 1, due to a cancellation, Saturday 9 and Sunday 9. I fit study and class around that!

i have to get my car battery fixed in the next week, get my hair done and study for my final exam. On Saturday and Sunday I study while I work because I have to sit around for hours while I watch someone sleep.

I want to pass, I guess I got cocky with my university work, I did try it’s just been hard because I have to work so much. I’m smart but I’m not used to writing assignments in an arts format as I am science based. It’s been a while since I have written essays and I’m out of practice.

i had a group assignment and the girls in my group were lazy and I was left to teach them the work. To run the group and by the time their parts were done I was exhausted and my part looks sloppy. I then worked a 60-70 hour week and had no time to fix up my part. I had to submit my part (with errors).

I am trying my best, working to support myself and studying is really hard. I have the flu. Work is exhausting, I feel like I’m never good enough. I feel like I’m not good enough for university. I’m not giving up. But I have to pass this semester. Mentally I would break down if I failed a subject. There’s a lot of pressure on me. I feel anxiety.

People take and take and they expect a lot. I only get paid $21 an hour for one job. It’s a second job so it’s taxed at 40%. I’m also expected to pay for a lot of out of pocket stuff. But I’m there for a reason I have a plan.

I know what I want and where I want to go. I’m just exhausted, it’s the end of term and I need to stay strong and positive. My ex said I could never survive the work force without him and here I am. I’m learning to be assertive it’s just hard.

[YellowPoppy]

Just in case no one has said this to you. I am proud of you. I am impressed by your resilience and determination! What you are doing is incredible! Good f*cking job!!

I know this is tough, and I know you're struggling but you have also indicated that you can do this and that's important. No matter how tough it is, you got this. And I might take time to respond but I will always get back to you!

Keep it up!

[Haveachat2u]

Thankyou