Finding happiness uncomfortable.

[Dwwmills]

Hello.

I’m just wondering whether anyone else has experienced this.
I’ve found in the last year of my recovery I have times where I feel quite
happy but I have times when I find it difficulty accepting or trusting this
feeling. I don’t want to sound like I’ve had a horrible life and I’ve never
been happy before because this is just untrue. It’s as if it’s easier to deal
with negative emotions than positive ones.

I’m not anxious about it or obsessing over it. It’s just
something that I had not expected.

[Bluey_moon]

I completely get this feeling! And I feel it too. To the point sometimes where I even think I self sabotage my happiness by thinking negatively.

I still have a long way to go with my recovery but. 

Its almost scary to feel happy again? 

[Chicken_Wings]

I understand this too.
Sometimes I will laugh and then think "no, stop, you're upset" and it's almost like I don't believe its possible that I'm truly enjoying the moment.

But I've started to try and tell myself that having enjoyment, just means I'm improving. Because when this thing is at it's worst there was nothing that could make me smile.

[Guest_1055]

Hello Dwwmills

Your topic heading really got my attention, because I have never thought about it before, but I am sure I get this feeling as well.

It is truly unusual, and I am finding it hard to get my mind  around it. Yeah an uncomfortable feeling when you are happy. 

Yes I agree, I think it is a sort of scary, like it is a bit foreign or something. Like its something new. 

Ok bye

[Mummybee]

"I miss the comfort of being sad.."

Frances farmer will have her revenge on Seattle- Nirvana 

[Dwwmills]

Hi guys.

Thanks for all the replies. It’s nice to know that other
people experience it as well.

It’s just a little bit out of left field and I only became
aware of it the other day. It’s funny how the mind works at times.

As you say “It is almost scary being happy again.”

[BBUser90]

This thread was started 4+ years ago so I don’t know if anyone is still reading this - but I’ve recently had a lightbulb moment where I realised that being “happy” is a major trigger of mine. I don’t seem to know how to deal with the energy and emotions when I feel happy, proud or energised by making good life choices like going to the gym consistently etc. I can totally relate to feeling like negative, depressing moods are easier to manage.

I feel like I’m really being my own worst enemy at the moment - dulling my shine and not living up to my full potential because whenever I feel excited, happy or energised about life all I can think is that it feels uncomfortable and I want to drink wine or something else to numb the feelings.

I don’t like to drown my sorrows... I like to drown my happiness!

Hopefully some of you others who feel discomfort in happiness have found a way to progress through this stage? I know it’s not serving me well. I want to be able to experience all that life has to offer without feeling like it’s too much to process.

[quirkywords]

wxt

Welcome to the forum.

I feel uncomfortable feeling happy but maybe for a different reason and I know why.

I have bipolar and my mania was always the mood that disrupted my life and caused chaos much more than my depressions did.

So now I am ok being sad as I know it will pass but if I am too happy or find myself enjoying myself or when things go well I get uneasy and reign in my happiness.

The chaos that my highs caused still haunts me.

I know that is different for you but my partner jokes that I don't like being happy and it makes me sound a bit weird.

If you want to continue this discussion you could cut and paste and start your own thread, and that way more people will see it.

Thanks again for your post.

Quirky