Feeling overwhelmed

[Loz83]

Hi all, having a very hard time atm and I feel like things will never get better. I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety since a teenager as well as endometriosis from age 12. This year my Endo has become the worse it ever has been, along with ovarian cysts and uterine polyp, which has subsequently left me in pain more often than not. I can’t function anywhere near my normal level and the bad day’s have far outweighed the good. As a result my metal health has suffered incredibly and i feel like I’m failing life. I have 4 kids and a hubby who works 2 jobs and very long hours. I just had my second rather large operation for Endo, cyst etc removal 2.5 weeks ago which I was so optimistic would help me but the recovery (approx 6 weeks) is proving to be much harder than expected. To make things worse my husband has had ongoing severe back and sciatic issues which became so bad this week he can’t walk and is looking at surgery himself now next week. I’ve had to take on everything in the household as well as looking after him while trying to heal and now I’ve overdone it and my pain levels have gotten really bad again. I don’t know how I am going to keep going. Im so down and full of anxiety, my hormones are a mess, I’m struggling to function and it’s so hard to go any see anyone about it as we have no family to help out and I don’t have a GP I trust. My life is just full of physical and emotional pain that never seems to disappear. I feel like I haven’t enjoyed life for a very long time and I’m worried how it is affecting my children in the long run. What do I do 😢

[Sophie_M]

Dear Loz83
 
Thank you for showing such courage in posting and sharing your experience.  We are a helpful and supportive community here, and you are very welcome.
 
We are sorry to hear that things don’t seem to be improving for you lately, being everything to everyone whilst tolerating so much pain can’t be easy to say the least, more so when you have a limited support network.  You mentioned you only had your surgery just over two weeks ago so remind yourself that it’s very early days and it’s important to make use of whatever small chance you get in amongst that chaos for some self-care Loz83; you sound like an amazing Mum who wants the best for your children, and that starts by taking care of you first.  Is there anyway you can make an appointment with an alternative GP, maybe one that specializes in women’s health and will have the compassion and support you are seeking right now?
 
It might help for you to speak with one of our counsellors too, even if to just explore some options for support or self-care?  You can all anytime, it’s completely confidential and available 24/7.
 
To call us, contact 1300 22 4636
To use webchat, Click Here 
 
Thank you again for joining us here and for starting this conversation. We hope that you find some comfort here in the words of wisdom and kindness that our community can offer, and please feel free to keep us updated on how you're going, whenever you feel up to it.
 
Regards
 
Sophie M

[white knight]

Hi, welcome 

In such situations where you are desperate, kind of durvival period, I've found it's best practice to put everything on the table- everything!

Such meetings with hubby (and professionals) can result with short, medium and long term goals. Eg, around 1987 during a crisis period my 1st wife and I acknowledged we needed a less stressful lifestyle that meant a move to a regional area away from the city, traffic, etc. It worked. I also changed professions away from physical work. We found housing cheaper and other spin-offs.  It all depends on your situation.

In the meantime take advantage of centreline, make an appointment for a chat.

I hope that helps.

TonyWK 

[Mark Z.]

Hi Loz83,

I'm so sorry for your challenge, it must be very hard for you and your family.

As you're in a very important period of recovery, you do need to have good rest, it's important to your physical and mental health. When you say you don't have other family member to look after you, have you tried to seek help from your or your hubby's close friends? Alternatively there might be some resource in your community, for example, support workers. Some of the support might be even free but you need to check availability. You can feel free to ring Beyondblue hotline for some referral.

Regarding a good GP, are you using 'Nextdoor' app? You can ask your neighborhood for a recommendation on it.

Hope everything will be better.

Mark

[relaxed_robert]

Hello Loz83 sorry to hear it sounds like such a hard time all around for yourself, your husband and family. You mentioned you have four kids I wonder if the school can help at all. Being on a school board myself I know that schools try to do a lot to support students and families. This depends on being ready to share your situation. I’ve found this community really helpful.

I hope you get the support you are looking for!

Robert