Constant anxiety and I don't know exactly why

[LDeeDee99]

Hi, i don't usually reach out online for my mental health, this is my first time so ill go through my history with anxiety,
I'm 19 yrs old and have always been an anxious person for as long as i can remember and at 16 I was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder by a psychologist I was seeing. Since then I've had periods of being very anxious and depressed for a few months and then pushing through to being ok only for something else in my life to trigger me and fall back again. With each of these episodes I've come to know and understand my anxiety symptoms and how to calm my body down when my symptoms come.
This time last year my family GP thought it was a good idea to put me on anti-depressants as I was in another anxious and depressed pit and they had really helped me as well as seeing a psychologist. In August this year i decided that i wanted to try and come off the medication, so i listened to my gp's instructions of tapering off and all went well. Since then i've been dealing with health, relationship and family issues that have sparked my anxiety however i felt ive had some control over it and the feelings would wear off if i engaged in breathing exercises and/or an activity.

This past week and a half however, i have had anxiety like i have never felt in my life. The physical symptoms have been the strongest ive ever felt- (extremely tight chest, out of breath, increased heart rate, burning skin, weak upper body, bloating, sore/ upset stomach, sleeplessness, irritability). These symptoms have been constant at a high level and don't want to go away no matter what i do. I cant seem to find the trigger of this and it seems as though it has come for no reason, im not really thinking about anything to make me overwhelmed. Ive tried mindfulness, having hot showers, breathing exercises, all of which usually helps me relax but nothing works. My body just has a mind of its own and is randomly going into panic. Im so exhausted yet i cant rest because my body is really tense and it's just driving me insane making me depressed as i feel i have no control.
I have been put back on the same dosage of medication yesterday by my GP so we will see how that goes.
I feel hopeless
Would anyone have an explanation as to why im feeling such intense feelings even though im not really thinking of much to be triggering me?
And what some relaxation techniques work for you?
 

[Mina19]

I honestly understand what u are going through. I’m 19 too and my anxiety also started when I was about 16 but from a different cause. When I was in my second last year of high school I was almost sexually assaulted by one of my teachers he exposed himself to me and since that day I’ve had literally most of the symptoms u mentioned above as I’ve also said I feel like my body is in constant fight or flight and it makes me sick to my stomach. I haven’t used meds but have been prescribed them. Don’t worry pal

x

[Worrynomore]

For myself, the best descriptor for the constant worrying is continual internal turmoil but it’s really hard to answer the ‘why’. Ultimately I think it’s just a part of someone’s makeup and therefore part genetics, but probably made more visible at certain times because of events going on in life. I know that’s probably cold comfort and how much of a crap feeling that constant worrying it is, which feels like an eternity and is so debilitating.
It’a super impressive that you’re really advanced with your anxiety knowledge and support structure but I wouldn’t focus on a silver bullet fix, if there was one, it would be able to be googled. What I’ve found helpful (until there is a panacea) is to draw upon your support options according to circumstances. (Cold comfort again I know) Sometimes you may only need to use one or two options and other times you may need to bring out everything you’ve got in the shed. The other aspect that sucks is you never know how long you’re going to need them either. From my experience, to help use your support structures and let the episodes pass you have to grow your self-acceptance that anxiety is part of you just like your taste palette or what music you like (it’s just part of who people like us are) and develop your recognition and agility to know when, what and how to use support structures. These things didn’t grow for me overnight because in a month (or so) it’ll pass so i tended not to prioritise responding to symptoms as much...until the next episode. I’m 20+ years down the track on my anxiety relationship and in some ways (not trying to sound defeatist) haven’t budged it....I feel a bit stupid saying that. I have learned to recognise and manage when it appears a bit better though however the constant worrying from internal turmoil is very hard for me to escape at times. Here’s hoping for a medical miracle...

[Moonstruck]

My eye was drawn to this thread from LDeeDee and feel deeply for her to have such turmoil at such a young age. A CD that I find helpful and reassuring is available from the ABC Shop, called "Worry Free" spoken by Carrie Warrington, I think her name is. It helps me considerably both during anxiety attacks during the day and I often play it to fall asleep by.

Worrynomore described what we are going through very well. Mine has escalated over the past couple of months into an unbearable state....I guess having a relative's death followed by relationship breakdown and then the stress and pressure of Christmas, making travel and family plans and so on...(all in the blazing heat) has me in a pathetic state. "continual internal turmoil" is how you put it and that's exactly how I feel. I am scared I will turn to alcohol again just for some relief...as I did years ago to the great detriment of my health.

It's all I have.

I know I need support but family and close friends have no idea I go through this...I am too embarrassed to reveal how bad it is, and they would have trouble believing me as I put on such a good "facade"....(they actually tell me their troubles and lean on me for wise advice...go figure!)

I begin a Mindspot online treatment course in January....have no idea how that will go. I am at the stage now where I am beginning to think I actually need assistance just to accomplish ordinary everyday tasks!

I wish you both and Mina, good wishes and love, in keeping on doing our best...that is enough.