Centering this centaur

[Centaured]

Hi.

I ain't quite sure where to start. I'll start by introducing myself. I'm a 26, non-binary nerd. I'm obsessed with mtg, gaming, and pretty much anything in fantasy genre (though due to my mh can't actually read a good book anymore)

I have a long list of my issues, most of which I guess can be pointed down to anxiety and obsessive thoughts.

Though rn I'm manic and don't know how to get support. I ended up in emergency on Tuesday following police intervention only to be kicked out the psych ward them telling me having a goal will fix all my problems. Ive been on the wait list for a psychiatrist for months, I have no idea what happened to a psychologist referral I had last month, and I can't get into a dietitian til next month.

I don't know how to recenter and get my head screwed on straight enough to use my safety plan right now. How do I slow down enough so I can use a strategy.

Though the main reason I'm turning here is for advice on eating disorders. Does anyone have experience in this topic. Where do I go for help. Is recovery possible. Can you find yourself aside from the ED.

Is even centering oneself possible when the brain is shutting down from lack of nutrition and sleep.

[ErinB]

Hey Centaured,

Are you on medication? A lot of therapists recommend a mixed treatment of medication and therapy because the medication can give you the boost you need to get to therapy and be present and apply the things you learn in therapy outside of therapy. Perhaps it would be worth looking into medication? Especially if the waitlist for a psychologist is all over the place.

I too suffer from an eating disorder. Recovery is possible. There are so many stories of people who have recovered from eating disorders. I find reading real life stories helpful sometimes! I think the best help you can get for this is to discuss it with a psychologist so definitely keep trying to find one!!

[Centaured]

Hey Erin B

Thanks for responding.

Ive been waiting to see a psychiatrist regarding medication.

I feel so stuck.... waiting lists are just too long.

[Centaured]

I went to my GP today to get referrals to mainland inpatient treatment options. There's probably no chance of going to treatment because of the corona virus and geological restraints.

My GP wants to see me weekly now for tests and ECGs. She said if my weight drops again she'll put me in the stupid hospital here. I cant go back there...

[Ggrand]

Hello Centaured..🤗..

Im sorry your struggling so much with your mental health and eating...

I had the same problems with psychiatrist, psychologist etc...my Dr. prescribed some basic anti depressants until I was able to see a psychiatrist..Maybe if on your next visit you could request if your dr could do that for you...Maybe your Dr. could set up a Skype session with a psychiatrist, psychologist etc...

Some hospitals just don’t care about mh patients..and it’s so unfair..I’m sorry they said that to you..it’s not right..imo..

I comfort eat..the opposite of you..I’m wondering if you just don’t want to eat, you can’t eat or couldn’t be bothered eating....

Eating balanced meals is so important for our mh and physical health..even if you boiled an egg, or bought those ready made meals from Coles or Woolworths, they are quick to cook..a few minutes in the microwave and they aren’t really big meals, they are healthy and balanced in nutrients..and not overly big....Please Centaured..It’s so really important to look after you....

I have trouble falling asleep at night..I now listen to gently spoken sleep stories, and listen very carefully to the readers voice and story..I usually fall asleep before he’s finished reading....Do you think that you might try some of these suggestions..I know what works for one doesn’t always work for others..but worth a try anyway...

I hope your day today was okay and tomorrow will be a better day....It’s a very hard time we’re trying to get through with this Corona virus...Please keep yourself safe..

sending you Kind thoughts, my love and caring hugs.💜🤗.

Grandy..

[Centaured]

Thanks for the reply Grandy

Since making this first post I have managed to get some sleep. Things are no longer manic 🙂

I am booked into the psychiatrist next Wednesday and have a dietitian on that Friday. My GP has resent the referral to a psychologist because the psychologist didn't get the first one..grrr.

With all this covid stuff I'm worrying that none of this stuff will happen anymore. Doesn't help that I have a cold. My physio and OT services have already shut down for treatment of my disability and so has all my social groups.

Eating balanced meals is too hard for me. I don't want to eat/can't eat. On bad day fluids are hard enough (I am aware how dangerous that is, I'm sorry). Sometimes I do binge eat, but then bulimia kicks in. My anorexia/bulimia is spiraling due to the state of the world.

I asked my to refer me interstate for treatment but that's probably not going to happen because of travel limitations and idk if the referrals will be accepted anyway coz im not underweight. There is literally no treatment in my state. My GP says if i get sicker she'll force a general admission to hospital here despite there being no treatment and no MH support in my local hospital.

I'm ready to give up with my ED tbh.

[Centaured]

I've been accepted into treatment through BETRS I just can't go coz of stupid covid19. I cant deal with this shit anymore.

[Ggrand]

Hello Centaured....

Please..Don’t give up on you..It’s hard right now..I have lost my mh support worker’s home visits..plus my volunteer work...It’s is so hard to cope through this virus..but I believe it will end and because you have been accepted through BETRS..when this is over, your acceptance will still be valid..maybe I’m not sure, they might ring you and do a phone session....

Please try to eat..something each day...I understand that it’s hard for you atm..but hospital will be even harder...I was hospitalised at one stage and in their you are made to eat...so dearest Centaured, try as hard as you can to eat something that’s nutritious daily...The meds only take the edge of our depression but we must try as hard as we can to help us along the way..by showering, eating, drinking, by looking after our physical and mental needs..

The last few days have been hard for me..and I’ve been a bit down...missing my weekly visits a lot..I rang my only friend in town this morning and we chatted a little which made me feel good..I haven’t seen or heard anyone for nearly two weeks..as I only went out to my volunteer job...Do you have someone you could ring to have a nice chat with?..Maybe from your special groups...it does help make us feel not so alone..

Please don’t give up...Things will improve once this virus has gone and things get back to some kind of normal ..hang in their the best you can...I’m walking along side of you, sitting next to you, listening to you and holding your hand to support you..

I hope that today, something good happens for you..that makes you feel a little less alone...

Im sending you my care, love and some hugs..🦋💜🤗..pl

Grandy..

[Centaured]

Grandy sorry it's taken me so long to respond. I'm really not coping atm.

Im sorry you're struggling too. I don't have much advice I'm sorry.

Food is too complicated. I can't do it. Im seeing my GP for tests on Thursday. I'm scared about it. I'm scared she'll force me into hospital....I can't deal with that idea.