Avoidance

[gloria10]

Hi,

So I've been trying to work out why I struggle with work and I think one of the issues is avoidance. It can be if I avoid a confrontation or getting upset at work and even now I realised I've been putting in a lot of energy to avoid Work for the Dole. I know it isn't a bad thing, I know that it helps with confidence and keeping active with the community, but I find myself trying to avoid it and I realise I do this a lot as well.

I also find it hard when I feel backed into a corner like there's no other choice (which is how I feel with this situation) and I guess I just feel agitated.

Has anyone gotten help with avoidance and has it helped? I am going to see a counsellor soon and think this will help. Just feeling a bit anxious at the moment..

I think I am also worried about failure. Workplace providers can put a lot of pressure on and I'm worried I won't be able to achieve what they ask. I guess I haven't had much luck with them.

Gloria10

[_FallenAngel_]

Dear gloria10,

"Fake it till you make it" attitude worked for me. Wear a smile on your face always and appear confident, that's what most people do. I still do 🙂

[gloria10]

Thanks FallenAngel I'll remember that. I just don't know why it's bothering me so much, normally I just accept things and deal with it, this time I've been trying to fight it so much.

[BballJ]

Hi gloria10,

I am a little confused over the avoidance context you are referring too, are you saying you avoid things at work so there isn't confrontation or do you avoid working in general? Sorry if I missed it just wanted to make sure I was 100% clear on what you were referring too.

I think with anything mental health related, seeing a counsellor really does help and gives so much clarity. I have suffered from anxiety for many years now and it wasn't until I started seeing a psychologist that I gained an understanding of it and how to deal with it and manage it.

The worry about failure is very common in the work place too, we never want to disappoint our managers but I find if you have an open dialogue with your manager and making sure you understand the task at hand it can go along way to succeeding in the work place.

My best for you,

Jay

[Sophie_M]

Hi everyone, this is a continuation of earlier threads so we're going to close it off.  

When seeking support on the forums, we really encourage members to use one thread rather than starting new ones all the time.  It's really difficult for the community to keep up with your story if you have a lot of threads going at once, and you may find yourself having to repeat information if your story is spread across the forum - sometimes our members will be repeating themselves as well if it's an issue you've had previously.  

Help us to support you by keeping to one thread, even if you're returning here after a period of time.  There's a lot of value in seeing how someone's story evolves over time, and when facing a new crisis it's helpful to scroll back and see how you've coped previously.

Links to the earlier threads on these themes are below:

Advice with anxiety

Couldn't cope with new job