Applying for a new job

[rachulip]

Hello,

First time posting here, I am currently in an industry that I am losing passion for. It is making me so anxious that I feel like i am not performing to the best of my ability. I am so stressed and anxious, I cannot think clearly and make decisions, I do not feel supported by my team and not to mention the wage is not good and the communities perception of my industry is also so disheartening. I don't want to go anymore, I feel like I just want to run away, it's becoming so overwhelming, I just don't know how I am going to keep going until I find another job.

I desperately want to find a new job, in a new industry... except, I can't bring myself to hit the 'apply' button online for some jobs that I have found. I don't know what is stopping me, I so desperately want to get out of the industry (I've been in this industry for five years and at this particular company for nearly three years) but I just can't bring myself to apply, I am so nervous about going to an interview and messing up any questions that they are going to ask me, it's making me feel sick!

I've put a lot of time and effort into the current industry that I am in, completing a certificate III and a diploma and I know the industry almost like the back of my hand, so I guess it's a comfort zone thing but I know that I cannot stay there any longer, I don't think it will be good for my mental health.

Has anyone else felt like this? How did you overcome these feelings? How did you take that first step?

Thanks in advance for your support!

[Janey123]

Hi Rachulip!

I can relate a lot to your post, my anxiety mostly stems around my work and a lack of support/trust in the workplace.

You do not have to stay in a job that makes you feel like this, forget the time and effort, it is all in the past! Try and focus on where you are now and take action (even if it is a teeny tiny baby step), doing this you will build confidence and feel less trapped hopefully.

At a course I did once, they asked us to list the top 5 most important things we wanted from our work (security, flexibility, task variety etc). Once we had done this, we had to rank our current job 1-5 on how well it met what we truly wanted, before we considered changing careers. This worked well for me, and it might help you narrow down your job search.

Have you talked to someone about your anxiety? My GP sent me to a psychologist who helps me immensely with my work issues, and I'm slowly getting better and better at dealing with all the stuff my work throws at me. It used to overwhelm me, but it rarely does anymore.

Nearly everyone feels sick about job interviews, it is just a crappy part of life. But just imagine how good it'll feel once you've actually made the move! If it were me, I'd make a plan to change careers and start today. I would write down a bunch of possible options (so that all my eggs weren't in one basket) and then JUST SIT DOWN AND HIT APPLY! Try and find a few jobs that meet your criteria a week and just go for it. Nothing that bad will happen, people go to job interviews every day and they survive, just as you will.

Failing that, a life coach or something similar might be able to help inspire you to take that first step?

A couple of tips on how I survive in my sometimes toxic office (they may be applicable to you)..

1. Wireless headphones with happy music or positive podcasts/audio books (means I cannot hear my boss talking and get upset by it)

2. Avoid spending any time with toxic (energy draining) people wherever possible. Know who they are and steer clear. (Can you work from home or remotely?)

3. I make it my mission to be nice, honest and helpful. Maybe you are in this workplace to be the light in a dark place?

Hope some of this helps!

Janey

[rachulip]

Hi Janey,

Thank you for your comment, it has made me feel less alone and it's nice to know that I am not to silly for having these thoughts and feelings!

I just took the first step and applied for a job, eyes closed and pressed the button! I feel really nervous but am trying my best to stay calm and see what happens. I had my first psychiatrist appointment last night and she has given me some mindfulness things to work on to help with my anxiety.

Your first point unfortunately is not possible for me to do as I work with children.

Your second point is helpful, I have been thinking about this recently and trying to figure out how to go about my day with minimal interactions with these type of people.

Your third point is wonderful, you are so inspiring!

Thank you for your wonderful response!

Rachulip

[Guest_9870]

Hi rachulip, I think i know what industry you are talking about and im having the same issues, although ive only been in the job for a month and a bit so far i am finding it hard to work up the courage to talk to my employer because of the responsibilities i have been given already.

I kept going back to the industry also because of only having those qualifications.
My best advice is to apply for elsewhere, or if this has been your only job in this industry, perhaps try another place, especially if youre not happy, I know it isnt easy but you need to put yourself first.

I so desperately just not to want to turn up, and rather not speak to them at all, but it could work out better for the long run.

All the best.

[Janey123]

Wow, well done on taking a first step already! I hope it felt kind of liberating. Good luck with the rest of the process!

I'm really glad some of the tips were helpful. Please keep us updated on how you go 🙂

[rachulip]

Hi Everyone,

I made it through a phone interview and then on Friday I had a face to face interview which went well. I was successful and now have a new job! I just need to give my notice on Monday. Only problem is... it’s a role where I will have to work most weekends so I’ve had to give up my sport and now my mum is angry with me because my first weekend of work also happens to be my grandfathers 80th birthday party. I will be working with my brother in law so it’s going to be tricky for both of us to get the time off. I am feeling incredibly anxious and am questioning myself on if I really want this job, if I am willing to give up my sport and my family time on weekends. I always said I didn’t want to work in an industry where I will have to work weekends but I feel trapped in my current job and seriously need a change, I did feel pressured into applying for this role however I know I can’t blame people for my actions. I’m trying to convince myself that I have done the right thing and am trying to hype myself up about the opportunities which lie ahead except I can’t. I am so so so anxious and worried and I don’t know if I have made the right decision. I guess I can still pull out of the new role since I tehnically haven’t started yet? I’m just so unsure! 😞

[rachulip]

Hi Angie,

I’m sorry you’re feeling this way, I feel I can relate to you very much!

This is the third company I have been with in this industry and they have all been so different so I feel like I have tried out the scope of everything.

I hope you start to feel more comfortable soon, just remember that you are so capable of everything that you put your mind too. Don’t doubt your ability to grow and learn and be the best version of yourself you can be!

[Janey123]

Hi Rachulip,

Woah, that's amazing, you won a job already, well done! Doesn't sound like you 'made it through' the interview, it sounds like you smashed it!

It's hard to give judgement on what the right decision is for you, but from your first message, it definitely seems you cannot keep going at your current job for much longer if it is making you so unwell. There is no rule that says you have to stick with this one forever either, but you can only give it a go. Try looking at it as a stepping stone if it helps, use it for a while, keep seeing the psychiatrist, and keep looking for the right fit for you. It is all about taking baby steps in the right direction, and if you make a decision that isn't right, learn from it and keep moving on. You aren't committing to this job for life, just for right now. I had to work weekends for a year or so and yeah it's not great, but I got used to it, my family learned to work around my schedule, and eventually I moved up to a better role that didn't require weekend work- so now my weekends are mine again to do what I want.

It sucks that you'll miss the 80th and your mum is upset, but you cannot please everyone, all of the time. Try and spend some quality time with your grandfather on another day to celebrate perhaps. Does your Mum know why you need to make this move? You have to do what is right for you first and foremost.

I hope all went well with giving notice today! Hope you felt relieved 🙂

Janey