Dear New Member~
I'd like to welcome oyu here to the Forum and ask if it is only speaking to others that is difficult or if you have a more generalized anxiety over many things?
If the latter is the case may I suggest you see your GP and set out these worries and see what happens then . I have generalized anxiety and it is only though treatment and meds it has improved. Then agian I fell into the trap of leaving it far too long.
It does not sound as if you have fallen into that trap but are seeking assistance quite quickly.
Firstly the second language business. Your written English is just fine, at least as good as mine. When you are talking to someone do they normally understand what you are trying to say?
Confidence in taking to a group is one of things things that is a spiral, the worse it feels, so the less you do, so the less confidence you have, so the worse you feel ....etc
The same applies in reverse the more you do the better you feel. Having spoken to many groups and audiences over a long time I still get nervous but know I can handle it. In a meeting I write down quick dot points of what I want to say while others are talking (saving me thinking and taking at the same time), and with an audience I use notes.
You may find breaking into a conversation is difficult, all I can suggest if you cannot find a pause in which to speak is to quickly agree/disagree with the last speaker and then say waht you want. That allows you to jump in where there is no real pause.
I"m not surprised you "find myself feeling frustrated, disconnected, and constantly doubting myself." If you feel gagged and unable to express your views that is only natural.
The only other thing I'd suggest is to balance what is the most important thing, how difficult it is for you to voice something, and how imortant the matter is - it may need saying no matter what.
Then again you can also arrange for someone else to ask you what your views are.
I hope some of this helps
Croix
