I have no friends

[Shelbelle]

Well if you couldn't guess by the title i have no friends, well i have 2 friends. I just finished year 9 and am part of a pretty big friend group, on the last day of school they all went to maccas and i was the only one not invited, they all tried to blame me because 'i left the group chat' but no one tried to tell me, and i left the chat because it was all wildly inappropriate stuff that i just didn't want to deal with. So when i asked someone to add me back and confront them about it they all blamed me for not being in the group chat and it's not like i would win an argument against 15 other people. Then they removed me from the group chat and they were all mocking me and saying 'ding dong the witch is dead' like i was the problem. Then like 4 people private message me and say it to my face. One of the boys Maddox is in another group chat with me and Tessa and he just started ignoring us, and he got mad at me asking about maccas the day of and i got mad at him for making it seem like i knew about it the whole time and chose not to come so i unadded him. Anyways he kept ignoring us and i was like this is like no i am not doing this so tonight when he responeded to something tessa posted i said 'Omg u actually responded,

stop pretending that "not having an input" or "reading it too late" is a valid excuse. If you cared even a little, you’d make the effort to engage or at least acknowledge me instead of letting me feel ignored. Saying nothing at all repeatedly just shows you don’t value me or my presence. And now you want to twist it around and say, "this is why I don’t respond"? That’s such a weak excuse. The so-called "backhanded remarks" you’re accusing me of making are just me standing up for myself because of how you’ve treated me. If you’re so quick to cut me out and use that as justification for being removed from the group chat, maybe you should think about why this all happened in the first place. If this is how you define friendship, then no wonder things fell apart.' and then he left the chat apparently after saying some hurtful stuff but i didn't open it because i was ignoring him the same he ignored me. But it was a 3 person group chat and neither tessa or i have any other friends to add to it so it's back to being just us. And tessa is supposed to just be finishing year 8 and my other friend izzy i can't tell anything because she is in yr 10 and severely depressed and i don't want to make it worse so. Sorry about the rant. 🙂

[Sophie_M]

Hello Shelbelle, 

No need to apologise for the rant, that is why we are here! This honestly all sounds so frustrating and disheartening... no wonder you are feeling hurt. It seems like your friendships aren't feeling supportive or stable right now, which can really make things feel overwhelming, can't it? 

I am curious, when did this friendship group feel good for you? What was different?

And what makes Tessa and Izzy better friends? Is there a way you can still be heard and spend time with them but also balance also being there for them right now? (These are the best friendships in my opinion!) 

It could be helpful to talk about all of this with a trusted adult, teacher, or school counsellor? You can also access more support through Headspace and ReachOut: 

headspace National Youth Mental Health Foundation

A Safe Place to Chat Anonymously, Get Support & Feel Better | ReachOut Australia

But for now, I'd like you to focus on how you can be extra compassionate towards yourself today. Friendships can be really, really tough and it's hard trying to defend ourselves when we feel unheard or unseen. You are doing your best in a very tricky situation. 

Looking forward to your reply, have a lovely weekend! 

Warm regards, 
Sophie M.