Sleep issues - I can count the number of times I have seen a rising sun (Max 10 times I guess- I'm 25yo)

[okadoka]

There is so much to write about myself. I have been going through immensely bad times. At one point everything was happening all at once - university study load - concentration problems, fear of people, fear of future , social anxiety, sexuality, night terror attacks, Hyperhidrosis, depression, GAD, Problems with house mates which lead to accommodation problems,and failure to find a job. But, with support of family and university counselors I made through that nerve breaking time.

Some issues never seems to go - such as my chronic hyperhidrosis (Excessive sweating in various parts of body and extreme anxiety and embarrassment it causes) and sleep issues (regardless of what time I sleep - I wake up only after 12 hours), so if I fall asleep at 7.30 am, I'll wake up at 8 pm or sometimes even later. When I wake up I just don't like the feeling that I woke up in dark and that my routine is so weird. When everyone out there is commuting to work in morning I'm preparing to go to sleep and when everyone is heading home from work I wake up from sleep in agony. I've moved multiple times, now I've a private room again (because of sleep terror attack and also I generally do not have good relationship with room mates). So, I'm currently unaware if I'm getting night terror attacks but I do get weird dreams - it was of snakes when I woke up this evening.

I do not do any physical exercise specifically, so I walk to supermarket every other day, that's a total 3km walk from and back home. When I go out I generally make sure that I'm looking immaculately good, it takes a lot of time during night when I'm awake. When I'm outside for grocery shopping I do not make eye contact with anyone. Head down, pick my stuff up, scan, tap and run. When I used to live other house mates, I used to cook and was always appreciated for my cooking, but when I cook for myself it always turns out bad - but I still eat it as I don't like food waste.

I think I'm getting in too much details here. I would like to get suggestions for improving my sleep pattern, hyperhidrosis (Although I have lost all hopes on this one - as I don't believe in pausing the sweat for some days), tips for finding a part time job - I don't get replies ( I only have volunteering experience in university) and lastly how to go to a gym when you have social anxiety.

Thanks.

[Croix]

Dear Okadoka~

You sound under a pretty large burden, and coming here may have been difficult but I expect will be a help.

You mentioned uni councilors helped you through together with your family when things were really bad before. At present you have a pretty heavy load, may I ask if you are under any form of treatment for your depression and anxiety? This is not idle curiosity, it helps to give you more accurate answers if we know a bit about you.

If you are under treatment I'd strongly suggest seeing your doctor and explaining how things are at present. Your regime needs adjusting or rethinking - nobody should have to live as you describe.

If you don't have treatment please see your GP, book a long appointment and say all about your current life. If you think that might be a problem consider writing it all down first and sharing the paper in the consultation . Hopefully you will be given a Health Plan, some subsidized visits to a psychologist and perhaps medication.

Now please excuse me if I mention matters you have already thought of. In relation to your sleep, do you think it is partly a matter of habit, with your life turned around by 12 hours? Perhaps trying to re-establish a normal rhythm might help.

beyondblue has a paper with advice on healthy sleep practice - and exercise - here

http://resources.beyondblue.org.au/prism/file?token=BL/1785

It may not all apply but is worth a read. Speaking of exercise some regularly every day has been a big help to me in combating anxiety - and may help with sleep too. You do not necessarily need to use a gym to exercise, I go for a walk.

It must be pretty discouraging to eat badly cooked food. Can you reorganize so as to either cook things you know you are good at, or that are very easy? The enjoyment of eating and the sense of accomplishment can make it worthwhile.

I am no expert on getting a job. I do know everything I've done for very many years has started with volunteering, which either morphed into something permanent or lead to it. This sort of activity, with the regularity it imposes can help put your life-clock back in synch with the ordinary world.

You said your family had been supportive in the past, is this still the case? Having someone to lean on is a very big thing.

Having a look around this Forum to see how others have got on can be helpful.

I'd be very happy if you came back and said what you thought

Croix

[HamSolo01]

hey okadoka

firstly, let just say how much of what you described sounds a lot like me so i hope what i say here can provide some sort of help

Well done on making it through the nerve wracking time you went through earlier - i myself have recently been through very similar. That's mental health i guess. You are right however, when you say that some issues never seem to go or leave. My own stuff stems from early childhood and to some extent high school as well.But it does nothing for getting rid of it all and fixing it - that's just a process i go through with the psych.

However when one keeps the smaller things of life in check then the playing field is slightly more even in your favour. Things like diet, exercise and sleep. These 3 are crucial. Now you mentioned that sleep was an issue? It was for me too. I told my GP this and he put me on melatonin (sleeping hormone we all have in the brain). I started taking it and it helped but then it didn't so i stopped it, now as i type this i will be taking it in 5 mins before i go to sleep. IT takes an hour for it to kick in PROPERLY so I just read my book before sleeping. The idea is i read to make myself sleepy. Even plugging in my earphones - my dad snores like a sailor. Also quit using any tech at least 1 hour prior to sleep. This has meant I've had to quit watching youtube (addicted) but it's hard.Also maybe bring the hyperhidrosis up with your gp too?

Diet is also key. I'm trying to put on weight and its VERY hard as my bodytype is ectomorph and im a 6'5" guy lol. My social anxiety kicks in like it wont quit at the gym. The way I view it? As long as im hurting afterwards then its good. I just focus on bits and pieces to my routines. In this day and age body image for our generation is ridiculous, and i take it from your post that you are female? (you said you wanted to look "immaculate"). For whatever it is worth, any decent guy wont value you for how you dress. Not gonna lie, looking good does help but then if its not matched with intellect then forget it. That's my view.

And lastly, in terms of jobs. I've only done tutoring due to my anxiety. So i have VERY little money and haven't been able to travel or do all those things I like. It's taken time to get to where I am now, it will take more time to get to a better stage. Give yourself credit and focus on your health. We progress at different rates in life so you gotta remember this

Posts like this are vents, so get it all out!

[Dr_Kim]

Hi there,

Ok... there are a lot of things on your plate and it is probably going to be hard to tackle all of them at the same time.

So make a list and decide which ones to work on and in which order:

Something like 
1. Sleep disorder
2. Social Anxiety
3. Exercise 
4. Social skills
5. Excessive sweating 
6. Night terrors
7. General anxiety
8. Employment

Now shuffle them to work out what might be worth starting on first as it may be too daunting to try to fix everything at once.

So, for example , if you decide to work on the sleep issue , I would check in with your GP and try and get a programme for a sleep routine and maybe some Melatonin. You would need to really work implementing this change for some weeks for it to sink in to your brain and become your “new normal”.

If you decide to work on your Anxiety, again check with your GP and sort out your medications and get a good therapist and maybe a support group . For example, https://www.adavic.org.au/. I am not sure what is available in your area , but ask your GP or check the Beyond Blue directory https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/find-a-professional

I think for most of these things , you are going to need people to help  keep you on track . Finding a good GP and therapist  to help you work through the list will be really valuable. So book a double appointment with your GP and work through the list . Work together on what to start with and don’t rush . Be realistic with the GP and with yourself otherwise you will get frustrated and give up. Remember it is often 2 steps forward , one step back .. so start the journey and go one step at a time and be kind to yourself.

The main thing is is to start moving in the direction of where you want to be. Your post here might be your first step!

[okadoka]

Hi Croix,

Thanks for suggestions.

I have seen GP earlier and have discusses my depression symptoms. So the GP prescribed me an anti-depressant ; but after few days I stopped taking it due to irrational fear of the side effects and placebo effect of reading those symptoms. So, I started with Homeopathic medicine after that for few months - now gain due to placebo effect I guess, my sweat was under control. My homeopathic medicines finished 15-20 days ago, and I'm not willing to get further homeopathic medicines as I doubt if they actually work.

Sleeping pattern has been a matter of habit but I'm sure it started with my mental health. I do not want to sleep at night - at night I'm looking for interesting stuff to do and and I do not wake up on time later during the day as I'm usually not up to much.

Yes, family support has always been there both emotional and financial - Siblings and mom, constantly checks on me through whatsapp. I'm on student visa at the moment and graduating this year. Planning to stay after, so that's another thing to do.

I think what cause most depression to me is that I'm not financially independent.

[okadoka]

Thanks for the suggestions HamSolo01,

I have discussed my sleep issue together with depression and hyperhidrosis with my GP. She prescribed me anti-depressant but I did not go with them because of the fear of side effects, I took the tablets for few days when I realized that too much was going in my mind due to the medicine. My GP said that anti-depressant might help with sleep terror attacks. For hyperhidrosis, she referred me to another doctor, but due hefty consultation and treatment fee I dropped the idea.

I take care of my looks because I like to, but than again there are some days when I don't give any attention to looks. I'm a gay guy. Haven't come out to parents yet -as they are live in a very traditional culture and a homophobic country. So this keeps on biting me all the time that I'm hiding this from my mom and how she will react when she will come know. However, I came out to sibling about 6 months ago and they are cool with it, so that was relaxing.

[okadoka]

Hi Dr Kim,

Thanks for suggestions,

I have seen a good GP. She prescribed me anti-depressant but after taking it for few days I stopped because of the fear of side effects. However, for sleep I asked for sleeping pills (because my condition was very bad then) but she said that't the worst thing she can do. She said anti-depressant might help my sleep. Before that consultation I was taking blackmores sleep support, it worked for few days and then I got resistant with it effects.

Currently, not taking any medicine. But I think I'll book an appointment again and ask for Melatonin if my sleep patter doesn't improve by the start of this semester.

Thanks.

[Cloud_teal]

Hi okadoka

I have a few suggestions which has helped me with sleep and gym. I have anxiety and depression. I struggle mostly with staying asleep.

Sleep (combination of all of these):

• Sleeping in complete darkness with a dark eye mask.
• No caffeine within 8 hours of sleeping.
• No use of mobiles or laptops within 30 minutes of going to bed.
• Using a meditation mobile application such as "Relax Melodies" when I go to bed. Only problem is that I wake up when the 2 hour timer ends so I turn it back on and repeat the timer. I use the meditation audio every night.
• Using another breathing exercise application for muscle exercises.
• Timing my wake up alarm to coincide with an end of a 90 minute REM cycle.
• Very rare occasions I do use prescribed sleeping pills which basically sedates me.
• Sleeping with heavy blankets and a pillow over my tummy. I like the weight of comfort they provide, like being tucked in.
• Knowing my room is clean before I sleep.
• Having a fixed routine each night before bed - Change into pyjamas, brush my teeth, wash my face with a cleanser, moisturise my face with a night​ cream, moisturise my legs and then drink a glass of water.

As you can see routine has mostly saved me. I still have nights where all of the above doesn't help so I stay up reading books until I'm tired of exhaustion.

Gym:

• Go during the middle of the day during off peak times. I found this to be 2 or 3pm.
• Treat yourself to new functional gym gear. I felt embarrassed to go in daggy sweat clothes.
• Start off on the cross trainer and just observe what everybody else is doing for a couple of months. Eventually you might get familiar.
• Wear headphones (you don't need to actually listen to music) and look like you know what you're doing, i.e. stick with the cross trainer.
• Watch and read as many guidance materials at home before you go into the gym. I found livestrong.com useful.

It took me a couple of years before I started doing the classes. Now 10 years later I do weights on the floor with the big boys.

[okadoka]

well compiled and great tips, thank you 🙂