Hi,
apparently I should introduce myself, having joined up to beyond blue. I only looked at some posts today after a friend said sometimes they help her to see she’s not alone when she is struggling with something.
I have recently been diagnosed with BPD. I figured it out myself and then went gung ho to try to get help. I’m starting group sessions tomorrow and have had individual therapy twice so far. For me, this diagnosis is incredibly welcome. I wish I had got it years ago, perhaps my life would have played out very differently if I had.
I’m not upset that I have this thing. I think there are some very positive aspects of being this way - increased empathy, depth of feeling, passion, caring about others and the world. And to me, they are wonderful things to have and I wouldn’t want to give them up. However, the downsides of BPD: boy oh boy are they downsides. Sometimes I go from joyful exhuberance to suicidal ideation in the space of a few days, or a few hours. I haven’t had a relationship in something like 8 years, I lose friends, I have no faith in myself and can struggle with basic things like finding a job.
BPD is really hard work, most days.
But, I feel like there is no fault in us who have it. I feel like we have gifts to add to the world, we just need scaffolding and support to be in a world where we don’t quite fit.
I am joining Beyond Blue because when I talk to others who also have BPD I feel a sense of community and belonging, which is something that is not a standard occurrence when you have this thing. Knowing now that I have BPD, I can speak to others who understand me and can relate to my experiences and feelings, and I can relate to theirs. I feel validated 🙂 How wonderful that is.
Thanks for reading.
