I've been diagnosed with depression for 14 years now and anxiety for 10 years. Recently, things have become really difficult for me. Due to severe anxiety and terrible panic attacks, I was forced to resign from a new job (had only been there 7 weeks) in December last year and I am now relying on my partner to support me while I try to get better. The problem is, I found out after I resigned that my partner is in quite significant debt and so despite him earning very good money, we are struggling to make ends meet and getting down to the last dollar every fortnight just to get enough groceries for meals.
This is extremely stressful for both of us but I have always been one to hate being in debt, never had credit card debt, paid off my car loan early etc. so I find it really stressful and depressing, like I am trapped and powerless to help in my current situation.
I don't know what to do or how to get help. Previously I was seeing a new psychiatrist as I moved across town and also did not click with my old psych but I've been unable to go back and continue the work to receive an updated diagnosis (was diagnosed last October with Borderline Personality Disorder but another psychologist said I was "borderline borderline" which was not helpful being in limbo about what is wrong with me) but we can no longer afford it and things continue to get harder and harder.
I want to earn money but I can't work. The thought of being forced back into work makes me so panicky and sick to the stomach. My old psych was happy to do up the paperwork for the disability pension but because my partner earns too much (despite his debt), I am unable to access this for myself. It is very frustrating and bewildering. I am so down and I really don't know what to do.
I could really use some advice 😞
