Coping with coming off strong medication

[Guest_3712]

Hi all,

Its been a long time since I posted here but I've never forgotten the support I received during some very difficult times. Without going into a lot of details I have had major depression and anxiety for a number of years. Several admissions to psych hospitals, countless medication addictions and ongoing therapy and still I'm not "well".

I have tried to live a 'normal' life these last couple of years, as possible as that is while still heavily medicated, I've had a job ( retrenched before Christmas) , seen my daughter marry and the birth of my first grandchild- all good for sure.

But the price for this normality is that to function I have to take a lot of medication. But no more. I decided a week ago I cant live in this twilight world any longer and stopped one of my meds that left me so zoned out I could only take it at night or if I knew I wasn't go anywhere. not to mention the 30 plus kgs I've put on.

I have a supportive psych who I see regularly and while he wasn't happy I stopped without talking to him first he understands my need to try and gain back some control of my life.

Dear Readers I know I'm doing the right thing, but I have been on these meds for so long I'm scared I wont be able to hang in there. Its not my first time coming off strong medication but before I was in hospital and it was still very hard. I can feel some of the old anxieties creeping back and that dark cloak of depression I have managed to kept above my head, is beginning to slip further over my shoulders.

If anyone has gone through similar experience I would appreciate any support or advice.

Stressless

[Ken1]

You seem to be doing really well Stressless, despite everything you're trying to deal with! Between staying off your meds and talking yourself out of a panic attack, you're a real trouper 🙂

Why do you think you couldn't apply that thinking to other areas of your life?

[Guest_3712]

Hi Ken1

Thanks for the cheer squad

I had to think a bit about why I couldn't apply my positive self talk to other things . The only thing I could come up with is that coming off meds and stopping a panic attack are actual physical things that I can see direct results from.

I have always been results driven and need to see immediate outcomes from my actions, besides these two things are what I have direct control over. I can stop the meds. I can stop the panic attacks.

The other stuff, there are too many variables. A lot depends on what other people think, how they react etc etc .This will impact how I cope with these disclosures. I have found in the past being honest is not always the best way to go. A lot of people get hurt , including me.

Not sure if any of this makes sense

Take Care

Stressless