Hey everyone, I want to know if there is something wrong with me or if this is just another case of overthinking. I've been bound to this idea that i must be a good person in order to receive good things in life. hence, if i am a bad person, bad things will come to me. it has been torturing my mind for years and i wish i never cared about these moral consequences. especially with my actions that have unintentionally people (i have already apologised and we are on good terms now), i cant escape the thought that because of my past, that bad things will come to me. i am sitting my hsc next year and i feel like i wont get a good atar because of my bad actions (it sounds ridiculous i know). even the smallest things like forgetting to wash a cup will have me questioning if i am a good person. i need constant reassurance from people such as my parents to confirm that i am a good person. this means i will consistently ask my parents or even try and explain my behaviour to them to the point where they get frustrated at me and i start crying. i have self-inflicted injuries because i felt like i was a bad person/friend. even my thoughts arent safe, if i have bad thoughts, then i am a bad person. i would ask my questions why did you do that/ why did you think that multiple times throughout the day, and i get splitting headaches everytime i think about my actions. i kept searching up ways to deal with my past actions and yes, they are helpful, but i feel like its never enough. i am always spiralling. there was a time where i was scared to do my english assessment because i felt like ive been a bad person so i am going to receive a bad mark. i replay interactions and conversations in my head to try and determine if i was a bad person or not. i try my best to be a good person because i fear of being a bad one and its controlling my life. is there something wrong with me?
