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Dear unknownalivebutnotlivinganormalhumanlife~
I did look at all your name, and think I have picked up what you were trying to say and do understand. To have chosen it like that shows a degree of desperation. It also takes courage too for laying it out so frankly
You live in a country with one culture, but hemmed in at home by another
You have a very unhappy life, feeling anxious, angry, low self-confidence, low self -esteem, frustrated and having to live with parents and brother who probably due to their Iraqi origin have a fundamentally different view of family relations. Overlooking your individuality, treating you as some sort of stereotype and consistently comparing you unfavorably with others. An entity to be controlled and not really trusted.
You have diminishing number of friends and no one to talk frankly with and share your life’s problems - and joys.
There seems no end to it even though you have tried for jobs, a brave act in view of you mother’s behavior
Their outlook is in contrast to outside the door, where you are an adult, an individual with all the respect and responsibilities that go with it. A person free to determine their own life with their own beliefs. An attitude shared by your Australian cousins
I’d like to ask you:
Do you see a solution? Maybe move to a cousin?
Are you having medical support for your current feelings, after all they are pretty profound and a repetition of your eating disorder would be a great tragedy
I know I’ve not covered everything, please be patient come back and talk some more,
Croix