Hi all Newbie here I was raped 6 years ago. I only started seeking help
about it last year, before that I completely denied it had ever happened
& lived completely in denial about it, never speaking about it at all.
No one was there & I didn’t know t...
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Hi all Newbie here I was raped 6 years ago. I only started seeking help
about it last year, before that I completely denied it had ever happened
& lived completely in denial about it, never speaking about it at all.
No one was there & I didn’t know the perpetrator. As nightmares, anxiety
& depression started to rise it became clear I couldn’t hide from it any
longer & my life started to unravel. I couldn’t work for almost a year,
could barely leave the house, couldn’t even make phone calls to make
appointments for myself with my regular GP who was helping me through
this challenging time. Since that unravelling its been an absolute
rollercoaster full of massive highs and massive lows. Massive highs of
finding the strength to begin and continue therapy, tell my family what
had happened to me and make other big steps to finding my version of
stability and recovery, as well as massive lows such as incredibly bad
days, diagnosis of PTSD, and other major obstacles. Despite being on
medication, semi-regularly continuing with my psychologist, having a
super strong network of family and friends that know now of my rape &
can support me I still struggle so much. I know that I am so lucky to
have a great network of supportive people around me, but I’ve hit a wall
& I just feel exhausted, nauseous and as if my body has been hit by a
train. Every day my whole body aches, my head hurts, I have stomach
problems and struggle to make it through a day without needing a nap or
mass amounts of caffeine to cope. And I don’t understand why L . To add
to this I’m just feeling more & more that no one really understands what
I feel & how hard every single day actually is. I am grateful for every
single person in my support network but they don’t understand. They
don’t understand feeling so sick & exhausted basically every day for no
reason. They don’t understand how hard it is to just have nightmares
most nights.. Of my attack and just of distressing, disturbing things.
They don’t understand my brain & the hardest part is I don’t understand
it either but I am trying to. I guess I just wanted to reach out to stop
feeling like no body understands me