Making friends as an immigrant

[NewInTown]

Hi everyone,

I’m in my 30s and recently moved to Australia. I live in a small town, and I’m finding it really hard to make friends.

I have a few challenges. One is that English is not my first language, so while I can have a basic conversation, it’s very hard for me to go further and truly connect with someone. Another challenge is living in a small town where there aren’t many chances to meet people. And I also struggle with starting conversations and small talk, so I often stay quiet even when I want to join in.

Because of all this, I feel lonely and sometimes hopeless. It’s frustrating to want connection but not know how to make it happen. I’m posting here hoping to hear from anyone who’s been through the same thing and found a way forward, or anyone who might have suggestions or advice.

[randomxx]

Hi there op and sorry about the struggles.

While l don't really have any advice in this department except l guess just trying to get out and about, go to things of your interest that might be on around the place- if any. One thing l did find was just sitting down for an outside coffee at any coffee shops around- weirdly the few times l did that l met people.

Another one that was a bout a 25min drive from me but they had a whale watch platform area. l loved going for the whales but also socially 100s of people would go and l often had chit chats with someone.

l also loved getting out and about to the other small towns around for lunch or whatever, even just groceries and you often had some nice encounters.

Butttt, alas , small towns in general are famous for being hard to break into even if your a native- but a new one, so don't worry it's not just you.

There's quite a few threads around from people struggling with the same thing.

Another thing l found was where say one town you may not be able to break into at all but yet the next one over you'd find people totally different there.

Good luck with things anyway.

rx

[sbella02]

Hey there, thank you so much for posting, and we warmly welcome you to the forums. And welcome to Australia too. I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling like this, and I can understand your frustration. 

Small towns can be really diverse in the way of connection - in some, you'll get to know people really quickly and in others, you may find that people keep to themselves more, which makes it hard to meet people.

My first suggestion would be to have a look online for any local groups or clubs based on an area of your interest (sport, books, crafting, just general social clubs), but this may be limited in a smaller town. It may still be worth having a look anyway - often Facebook will have pages for local events that could be interesting to check out.

I'll echo Randomxx's advice in that becoming a regular at coffee shops, cafes, or other places can be a good way of meeting people to connect with. People tend to be more open to starting conversations with people who they find to be familiar, so the more regularly you start going to these places, the more opportunities you'll have to meet new people to connect with.

I hope this helps. Please feel free to keep chatting with us some more if you'd like, we're here to support you!

All the best, SB

[NewInTown]

Thank you so much for your suggestions and advice. I liked the coffee suggestions. I can remember the times that I socialized with local people when I was out there. Nothing happens if I stay at home.

[NewInTown]

Thank you so much @sbella02 

I deeply appreciate your support

Thank you for your advice and suggestions

I agree with you. If I try the activities that expose me to local people, it's more probable that I can socialise with them. Thank you