Hi Keeeks84
My heart goes out to you so much, with you having had both your parents pass. While many questions can come with either Mum or Dad passing, I've found a whole different set of questions come with both having gone. 'How do I start living without both my parents?' can be one of the toughest questions to ask in life.
When people say 'Time heals all wounds', I have to say I don't agree with such a simple statement. I believe it's the skills we develop and our gradual change in perception over time, amongst other things, that is what helps heal the wounds. Time alone makes little difference. The people we surround ourself with can make a big difference. Those who raise us through greater insight, through moments of inspiration and even laughter, a sense of direction, a sense of vision and many of the things along those lines can be like a godsend. Those who feed our sadness are not those who come to raise us out of it. It can take time to find the way forward and during this time it's important to be kind and patient with ourself as we feel the challenging emotional triggers along the way. They are a part of our path, our way forward.
I have found some of the best elements of who I am through both my parents. It is so important to not lose those elements of yourself that you have found through your mum and dad. Through your dad, you've found you thrive on guidance and shared conversations about the funny, stupid or nonsense things in life. While what you've thrived on may not may not be present right now at this time of life and grief, remember to find ways to regain that through the people you know and/or come to meet. Don't lose yourself.
With my mum having passed this time last year and my Dad's funeral having taken place today, I have to say one of the greatest of gifts at a time of loss has been my imagination. I like to imagine that they both came into this world on the slipstream of life, into a baby body, and now they have left on that same slipstream leading out. They have always been and will always be (before their time here, during their time here and after their time here). I can connect with them anytime, through what I imagine. So if I was to ask now 'How do I live without you both', I can hear the answer...'You will manage, one day at a time, just as we did when we lost our parents. You will come to manage. Have faith in yourself and your ability to find the way forward'.❤️
