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Too strong of an empath

Daliah
Community Member

Hi, so I have really really strong empathy and I’m a little worried.
I was about to tell my parents that what they had bought had an incorrect ingredient (they made a small mistake at the shops) but the minute I thought it, my heart froze and I felt intense sadness and guilt as if I was on the opposite end. So now I can’t tell them because I can’t put them through the emotional turbulence of making a mistake without hating myself.

Has anyone felt this? Like understanding the other persons pain to the point it physically hurts?

7 Replies 7

Banksy92
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi Daliah,

This sounds like a really difficult thing to experience - is this something that has come on for you suddenly? Or would you say it is something you have always experienced?

There are definitely some people who experience more extreme levels of emapthy or "hyper empathy ". A range of techniques and supports are available for these people. But I definitely don't want to put a label or diagnosis on it as I am not a professional!

If you are concerned, I would suggest having a chat with your GP as the first step, just to see if they have any advice or can connect you with someone who can help.

Let us know how you go.

Beeee
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Daliah,

I can understand how such strong empathy can have you feeling worried. You're definitely not alone, as Banksy92 mentioned above, many people experience extreme empathy.

It's amazing that you can feel so deeply what others feel and connect meaningfully, however, if you're finding yourself at the point of physical pain perhaps it could be valuable to contact your GP and let them know what you're going through. I'm sure this is something you can work through and find a solution for.

Wishing you the best

Beeee

ChildHeart
Community Member

Hi Daliah,

I am an empath and I can relate. It's hard when you feel what others are feeling so intensely. When you say feeling it as if you were on the other end, you are picking up on the energy of others and not your own. As empaths, we tend to feel energy strongly and when we are around others, we pick up on that energy and feel it as if it were our own.

It can be difficult at times but you are not alone in this. Being able to separate your feelings from others can help a lot.

ChildHeart
Community Member

Sorry Deliah, just to add..

I'm a spiritualist and I don't normally talk about it here because I know everybody is different and has their own beliefs and even religions so forgive me if it sounds like I'm preaching here but, a good thing to do regularly is to cleanse your energy field because as I say, we pick up on the energy of others and it can stay in our energy field if we don't cleanse it much like how we take showers to clean our body. Speaking of that kind of cleaning one thing you can do if you take baths is to have a salt bath as salt is a cleanser, but if you're after something even simpler, go to youtube and search up cleanse energy field binaural beats. These frequencies may be able to help if it sounds like something you could do. You basically just listen preferably with headphones and you can meditate or you can even listen to them as you sleep. 🙂

This is just a suggestion please do whatever you feel works best for you and as I am not a doctor of course, if the pain continues perhaps see your GP? .

Username01
Community Member

Hi Deliah,

I understand exactly what you described as I experience the same thing. I think some people are naturally highly empathetic, and although I know it can be painful at times, I think it’s actually a really lovely trait to have and you can use it to your benefit if you can manage it.

My previous job was at a cafe, and I would feel overwhelmingly sad for the cook when food she made went unsold and was thrown out. The other workers thought I was so silly, to them it was just a part of the job!

I think just taking a minute to acknowledge that what you are feeling is perhaps a bit heightened really helps get some perspective in the situation and bring down the emotion.
If it is causing you distress, it might be a good idea to talk to a counsellor about how to manage it. It can be very tiring taking on other people’s emotions.
Definitely always put yourself first, but remember empathy is a beautiful thing and not everyone has enough of it. It allows you to connect with people in a special way, and your kind and gentle personality is an asset to you.


geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Daliah, having a strong empathy is always lovely, but it can leave you with a narrow box to respond and if something does happen that doesn't please you, then a drop from the top rung of the ladder can hurt and make you unsure of what to say.

If you tell your parents is only being honest and may be disappointed with themselves in not in purchasing the correct product and could go back and buy the right item.

They could be upset that you haven't confided with them, and this is no blame on you.

Geoff.

StevenK
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Sometimes as children we have maybe been brought up to feel responsible for our parents pain subconsciously. When I broke something that my mum bought me as a child, I would feel extremely guilty.. because I took on my parents pain subconsciously.

it’s also about practicing confidence, every time you push your comfort zone you grow as a person