Im at a crossroad

[9pmto3am]

ive never reached out for help in my life and as far as most people know im fine, but i havent been fine in years. i dont know how to explain my constant sadness. the amount of times ive rewrote this is incredible. i want to give up on writing this but im really pushing myself to make a change and this is just my attempt to just say im really not doing well, im feeling very emotional right now and it feels really great to be able to say that im not okay and to get this out of my head even if its just some silly forum. thank you

[Maddy_84]

After years had passed, I admitted something was wrong but that was mainly because I thought I was having a heart attack or stroke. The shortness of breath the tightening of the chest. I mean I'm 34 now and this started when I was about 23 years old. It has drained my life. Still to this day I have episodes I hate it! I wish I could flick a switch and breath a sigh of relief. Telling my family was another story.. they didn't want to believe it and kept saying how can that be god forbid that someone in the family has a mental illness. It was like my mum was ashamed. I had the whole lump in my throat too. I'm so sorry that you are feeling this way. I wish I could do more to help you.. day by day.. I always say that but why is that I can never stick to it I'm always thinking 20 steps ahead.. I am here for you

[Bethie]

Hi

You have admitted you need help. Great first step taken. 2nd you have posted here big hugs great work.

3rd step now is going to see your GP. Tell them how you are and have been feeling. I never had to do a test. Maybe it had something to do with me breaking down, crying and hyperventilating while I was trying to tell my doctor I just was not handling my life even on normal days.

We have alot on here about depression maybe read some of the stories and see if you can relate.

Our help line is full of useful links and can also help point you to places.

Your doing great