i dont know what to do?

[qsrgyjil]

Hi. I am just so sad, helpless and alone. no one cares about me, and i am at the end. i dont know what to do. i dont even know if i have depression or anxiety or anything, but i get really really nervous when going somewhere, and often feel like i am not good enough for anything. i convince myself that im sick and i think thats all it is. its not like ill ever talk to anyone, i dont even know why im doing this? i dont want to talk to anyone like a therapist or doctor. but can you respond if you can relate?

[qsrgyjil]

You see, i have always had it relatively easy. i know that sounds like bad, but read the rest and it will make sense. So my family, were not like rich or anything but its definatly not like were poor. So, nothing in my life has been that hard, i grew up in a good home, i went to a private schools, and everything has been fine. until i started getting really sad and worried. why is this happening - like theres no reason nothing in my life has been very hard or challenging. but its getting really bad and i dont know what to do. i know i sound like an idiot when i write this but yeah, no need to respond just how im feeling. thanks if you read this - i will never know - but it means a lot.

[qsrgyjil]

i cannot do it anymore. everyday i go to my school there is tears involved. i dont know hwat is wrong with me or why i cry, but everyday i really struggle to go. mind you, i go to a private school, have a good education with plenty of oppourtunities, have pretty goood friends and everything is absolutely fine - so why is it so hard? 

The work is too much stress, and even though im not even in an older year, everything is super stressful and important. when i see people there in my year, it makes me really (REALLY) nervous and self consious. i feel like i wanna pass out, cry, throw up or do all at the same time. 

the thing is - i dont know who to talk to about this. its to much, andi really just need some time off, but if i do i will miss a lot of stuff and then struggle to catch up. everything ii do now feels like it will count towards my entire career or the rest of my life (this includes every conversation i have, and all the schoolwork to).

i dont want to talk to my school counsellor or anyone, and when i try and tell my parents they just say that im not pulling my weight and im not helping anyone but myself. i really need help, but i dounbt if anyone is reading this even. if you are thankyou, i appreciate it.

anyway, thats all. im sorry for saying all this, you dont have to read its, its definitly not anyones problem but mine, and so i need to figure it out. also what is even wrong with me - i shouldnt be concerning anyone with this but here i am, like the idiot i am. im sorry if you had to read this, im going to post it so its my fault anyways, but sorry and thankyou.

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear qsrgyjil,

A warm welcome to our forums..

I’m sorry your feeling sad, helpless and alone…and feel like no one cares about you…You’ve come to a great place, these amazing forums, because you’ll definitely feel and will be cared for so much…

I joined the forums in 2013, so lost, alone, scared of life and didn’t want to talk to my Dr about how I felt…slowly I shared my story and got so much beautiful help and support from the lovely members here, that eventually I built up my courage to reach out to my gp….and i received the help I needed to get past my deep depression and move forward…

If you are in depression and anxiety, it really does need the help of professionals to help you better to understand and learn how to manage those dark, sad, anxious thoughts and low self esteem…A lot of people write down on a piece of paper, how there feeling and thinking and hand that to their Dr…if they don’t feel up to talking to them….Do you think that would be something that you could do?

Has anything happened recently that might have made you feel this way?….only answer if you feel you want to…there’s no obligation here at all…

Hope to hear back from you, thinking of you with kindness and my care..

Grandy..

[jaz28]

Hi there,

I am sorry you are going through this. I can relate. I feel you. I understand you! It is really hard to want to talk about these issues with someone, but you have taken a good first step in reaching out to us.

I would highly encourage you to talk to your family first - it is hard but it does help. Professional help might be something you can slowly work up to, but it can be life-changing and it really helped me. Please consider it!

I really hope you feel better and please continue to reach out.

Jaz xx

[Eagle Ray]

Hi qsrgjyil,

It is really good you have reached out here about how you are feeling. It is better than keeping all your feelings inside and not telling anyone, especially if they keep affecting you over time. Your feelings are valid and are no less important even if you feel you come from 

a good home, have good friends etc. Sometimes it’s possible to still be experiencing difficult emotions and it can help to talk it through to begin to make sense of it.

A resource you could consider is Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800 kidshelpline.com.au It is free and always open, so it may help to chat with someone there, if you want to.

When I was your age I was full of difficult emotions and didn’t tell anyone. I got nervous a lot, like you describe, basically going anywhere. There were fewer resources back then for young people but we did have a school guidance counsellor. However, I was like you and didn’t want to talk to anyone and didn’t think my feelings and emotions were important enough. However, I remember the guidance counsellor being a nice person (she came on a school camp with us) so it probably would have been helpful for me if I had tried to speak with her. I certainly needed to feel support but didn’t know how to ask for it.

So I think it is wonderful you are expressing how you are feeling here. It is a brave thing to do. Feel free to keep reaching out. Take care.