Help

[Speeder]

Hi there, I have been dating my girlfriend for 4 months now and just recently she has been diagnosed with depression. She has not entirely blocked me out of her life but has said she has no feelings for me or anyone atm. Being young and in love it hurt to hear her say that and I don’t plan on leaving her ever. I try message her and it’s always a negative response like we’re no longer together but as her psychologist says it’s just her brain doing this. I have only ever been with her in person 1 time in the 4 months we’ve been dating which makes it so much more tough. She is on medication and does see a psychologist and now it’s gotten to the stage where she needs more help. I speak to her mum almost every night to ask how she is and she seems fine but when I’m talking through her mum. Her whole family knows we are still together and the depression is doing this to her but now I’m hurting just as much.

[white knight]

Hi Speeder, welcome

I know being in love is hard.

If your gf says you are no longer "together" it means just that. Depression wont change someones feelings. Depression doesnt mean we dont know what we are saying. Also by talking to her mother nightly you are suggesting she isnt capable if making her own decision not to be with you.

I know this is a hard hitting reply but there is no easy way to be real about it.

As a last resort, have a break from her and her mum then contact her in a few weeks asking her if she has any feelings for you.

Tony WK

[BballJ]

Hi Speeder,

Firstly, welcome to the forums.

It sounds like she is having a hard time with a few things at the moment and it is never easy being in a relationship when one party is suffering from mental health concerns, you sound very caring which is awesome however you may need to respect what she says about possibly not being together, I do hope it isn't the case but maybe some space is the best thing for now, as hard as it would be.

My best for you,

Jay

[geoff]

hi Speeder, it is a shock when someone you love gets stuck down with depression, so you keep asking yourself so many questions why, believing that it's because of you, well no one really knows why, but it will certainly change how she feels in life, with your r/ship and with the quality of life.
Depression makes people say things they may not mean in real life, never the less it still hurts you, plus her mother is only saying this to protect both you and her daughter but it doesn't appease you.
What you need to do is go and see your doctor, because the effect from all of this is causing problems for, you don't know where you stand here, so please book an appointment, it's in your best interests because the future is what you don't know about. Geoff.