Dealing with anxiety and depression

[RJM]

Hi new here, need some assistance with my situation.

I have communicated with my family and close mate about my feelings of depression and anxiety I currently going through for around 3 months(anxiety I've had for ages). They constantly reassure me that everything will be better and you constantly gotta fight, keep myself busy and love yourself. After getting a gf for the first time. I have been getting really insecure and negative thoughts of her leaving flood my head. She's perfect and It feels like I nothing to offer her. Comparing both of us has made me self aware of the many flaws I deal with. I'm super quiet and it's hard for me to get along with other people may be for the chronic anxiety. If we were together far in the future I can't get along with her mates and or family. My life is also uninteresting in comparison. After the depression hit i have recognise many physical symptoms the constantly gets me worried. Stomach-ache, shakey hands and body when at the gym. It feels like everything is drag because I'm always tired. Cognitive decline such as its hard to multitask or keep up with a conversation. Biggest one of all is memory. I can't recall many long term and short term memories. I'm not sure if depression amplified my bad recall and forgetfulness or if i had it before already. It makes irriated because if I learn a new skill it will just vanish and happy memories that I create will go too. I try to take more pics to remember the happy times or anything at this point. but it gets sad then I need to repetitively do it. I'm dyslexic too, having reading and comprehension problems. I feel super dumb and slow. Usually when someone is quiet they think a lot but my head is empty with negative thoughts of myself. I don't want to die but want a restart in life with better stats ahaha sounds weird reading that back. 

Is my situation curable? Brain is filled with doubt and jumping into medication has got me scared, what if it doesn't help.

[Croix]

Dear RJM~

To answer your question I can only offer my own experiences. I'm not a doctor and cannot say anything other than I have symptoms very like the ones you describe, was a complete mess, and now am a completely different person. True I still have treatment however things are under control and I have a life I enjoy (and do not want to have to start again)

I was diagnosed with several things including depression and anxiety. My body had stomach pains, trembling, and other problems. My mind always looked on the worst side, and I constantly worried about things that had happened, or were going to. Always expecting them to turn out bad.

My mind was so full of these things I had inattention, absentmindedness and had difficulty being with most others.

Your family and best mate are doing the best they can to make things seem better, however I doubt that would be much help. It takes someone to have had the same sort of thing to understand and actually be helpful.

Can I suggest you go and see your GP in an extended consultation and say exactly what you life is like, your physical and mental difficulties and how you feel. Then see what happens. If you are like me the physical symptoms like stomach ache will be thoroughly examined to see if there is a physical cause, and if not may be seen as being a symptom of depression or anxiety.

Treatment of these conditions has taken some time. I was not able to make myself better so relied upon doctors. I had therapy and tried several different medications before I found one that helped a lot, and did not have side effects. My partner was a big help and very supportive.

While many peple feel apprehensive about taking medication, or having therapy, I guess the main thing to remember is that you are in charge. If something appears not to be working you  say so and ask that things be reviewed.

I would be most surprised if with proper assistance your life did not turn around, you stop spending all your time worrying and thinking you are uninteresting and start to enjoy things.

You are always welcome here

Croix

[RJM]

Hi Croix,

Hearing your experiences has giving me a sense of hope. How we've been going through similar things and your enjoying life now because you were more resilent and taken action. I want too as well. 

I've talk with my gp and they recommended a psychologist but unfortunately they been book out until 3-6 months and the other clinic couldn't even book at all due large amount of patients.  I'll try look elsewhere and give updates.  

I wish this all get better before it gets worse. This feeling of hopelessness is draining.I never knew the amount of people who are dealing with issues such as ours. I want to thank you for taking your time of day to help me and other people who are struggling. You've probably saved many lives at this point. Need to have my name in that list 🤞

[Croix]

Dear RJM~

It's not me that has saved lives, in every case it is themselves. I just try to be an example of what can happen. I am sure you are as resilient as me, just need the proper assistance.

It is a right pain having such long waiting lists for a psychologist. I always make sure for any medical specialist I also register on their cancellation list, surprising how often that works, then you have a foot in the door.

In the meantime while you wait can I suggest you try the Mindspot Clinic. They are a free government backed site where you can pick an on line therapeutic course for depression, anxiety or some other tihngs.

Although you do the course yourself there is clinical supervision and you can also request to talk to a clinician if you need help with the course. They will liaise with your GP unless you don't want them to.

You are taking action, and that is a pretty healthy first step. I'm sure with assistance of one sort or another you will have a far better life

If you wish to say what you decide that would be great

Croix