Crying

[Miss_Out]

I cry every day for the life I should have had. I am the single mother of two teenagers. Their abusive father left me 10 years ago for someone better, then on breaking up with her killed himself leaving a letter blaming me, his mother also blames me.

I am ugly, I have lost 50kg but ugly is to the bone, hey. I have been unable to establish new relationships as I am not what all the men want..

I live in a small community and the stigma of being a single mother is always there plus so much gossip and assumption of things that are not true.

I am also a professional, to my clients I seem happy and upbeat, able to solve all problems,but on the inside I am crying,hoping for someone to help me with my problems. I am just so alone in the world.

 I have some good friends, but they rely on me a lot and dont understand how lonely I am as they all have people who love them, and are not hideously ugly like me.

I feel constant envy for people who manage to be happy and loved although they hurt people' lie and cheat. I want bad to come to them and good for me. I am not perfect but surely I do not deserve a life sentence of misery.

I tried to get help today, my GP is booked out for 1 week, and my clinical psychologist is booked out for 2 weeks. There is no psychiatry in my area, the closest being over an hour away...I feel so alone and isolated, and only stay alive for my boys...I need help SSRI's are not working

 I am afraid for my own future

[geoff]

dear Miss Out, you have to remember that beauty is not necessarily the one attraction someone has for you, because after awhile this then fades away into the background, it's HOW YOU communicate with others, and to have the fortune of being able to listen, understand what they are saying, the rational and reasoning to be able to accept or talk about any situation, THIS IS THE MAIN BEAUTY of a person, which can last for a long time.

It's obvious that you have this ability, so then this makes you a beautiful person, so print this out if you can, and stick it on a wall or frig. where you can remind yourself that you are a beautiful person. L Geoff. x

[Miss_Out]

It's obvious that you have this ability, so then this makes you a beautiful person, so print this out if you can, and stick it on a wall or frig. where you can remind yourself that you are a beautiful person. L Geoff. x

Thank you Geoff, I know in my heart this is true, I have many wonderful friends who I am always there for and they are for me. However when it comes to romantic relationships I fail so badly. I  always allow myself to be treated badly and fall for very bad prospects. I feel lonely and isolated from the "couples world".

I know my self esteem is low and I feel inferior to others, but I also know that through my work I have met some amazingly clever people who still believe that looks and thinness are still the most important things a woman can posses when it comes to being attractive.

I am clever, witty and compassionate but it will never be enough in this world we live in..