Birthday Depression and Anxiety

[EspressoAndDepresso]

Hi just wanted to get this off my mind

I just turned 21 on Saturday and had been planning my party for ages, spending money etc. which I really don't have as I just wanted a happy night. The night came and I was riddled with anxiety which only grew throughout the night. My friends weren't having fun and I was stressed and having a panic attack. People started leaving by 9pm which is bad and I could barely stay awake and keep myself from crying. By 10pm it was only my closest friends left and we pretty much went straight to bed. In the few days after until now I've been so depressed as my birthday sucked and I feel bad inviting people over for a bad night and I made myself and my parents help and stress so much and spend money we don't have on a party that turned out terrible. I didn't allow time for my family to spend time with me, didn't cut cake, didn't get my family's presents or anything and I just feel so terrible and told my mum i feel bad and could tell she felt like she did a good job and i was telling her that it sucked. It's all a mess and I feel horrible. I wish I had just had a family birthday without friends there instead of spending my time crying for the past 4 days.

Anyone else experienced the worst time?

[jess334]

Hi EsspressoAndDepresso,

Birthdays & parties can be so disappointing. We build them up and then it is difficult for them to meet our expectations. Plus it is so much harder to relax and enjoy when you are have anxiety.

I planned a huge party for my sons 1st birthday last month. All the family was coming, even my nan from interstate. Then my son got a contagious sickness two days before. I had to cancel the whole thing. I felt so bad for putting everyone out and felt even worse that I had no pictures of my son on his first birthday. It still makes me sad.

I hope you start to feel better about it soon.

Kind thoughts, Jess

[SHELBY MUSTANG]

It seems like your best friend was there at the end and all that matters. Your mom will be fine as you are still young and things will heal and you will both come out the other side.

I have never had a birthday party my whole life in fact I wandered the streets when I turned 21 after a verbal fight with my mom. I now go away on my birthday either interstate, country or overseas maybe you should do that then you don’t have to host a birthday party but go away with your friend.

Remember your birthday is about your own happiness not fickle friends so go somewhere that makes you happy.