Hi there, I am new on this forum. Am on one hand lonely but also have
people am trying keep away from me ala restraining order. Being isolated
and lonely should not make me want to be with anyone. As a youngster i
socialised with my bullies who calle...
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Hi there, I am new on this forum. Am on one hand lonely but also have
people am trying keep away from me ala restraining order. Being isolated
and lonely should not make me want to be with anyone. As a youngster i
socialised with my bullies who called me ugly every day and abused me
etc and today i know its better be alone than with those who are bad for
and to you or when to many times is to many times. One must have a right
to choose ones spouse and friends. Recognised a lot of the things
chriscat wrote of in his post as i feel the same in many regards. Except
I truly know i deserve to feel loved and have a love and social life
swell as a sense of belonging and simply ackknowledged i have rights. I
beleive and know i deserve this but still do not have it and truly have
been bullied and threatened , abused etc and truly deserve a better
life. I have been to counsellors since childhood and never found help,
on contrary it had opposite effect as did medication which made me feel
worse with sideffect and one dr giving me 5 different types medications
(many which are illegal now). Think of the song "ive seen seven drs and
they cant help me they say im in trouble and its love i need" It may be
that simple :0 Being isolated, alone and on top of that perhaps have
trauma, abuse, molestation and other things in baggage may not help. Not
feeling a part of community, no inclusion but instead a alienation,
bullied and when it hits "adult years" it just becomes more educated and
clever.Beyond organised crime and often disguised to not be seen. I had
ovarian cancer 3 yrs ago and am living alone, isolated and ontop of that
had death threates, abuse, bullying, stalking etc upon me. Am 35 years
old single woman with no friends . No social life , no love life. I also
have been working very hard and not asessed my finances or
ackknowledgement for it. (yet). Thought advise plan things to look 4ward
to such as a holiday. But since have not assessed my money yet i can not
do so. Some one i know of went travelling the world when i had cancer
and was gone for few months. That would be wonderful to do such a thing.
One could go on a shorter weekend getaway. I also understand what
chriscat wrote of loosing passion or flow for hobbies and talents. For
me its more been du to so many years of suppression. Like a artist or
author who 4bidden may not flow. It may not be you. One woman apparently
had a polititian with all her friends attacking her , slandering and it
was indeed very educated and clever a ways also illegal but that was
covered to look good. She had no friends in community and lies told of
her etc. She was also a educated and good woman but this still happened
to her and defending her self was not so easy despite as she was alone.
Hope to start exercising (get walkman start jogging) and be more
physically active aswell as maybe start attending church but one may
feel a fear of people if one been treated bad, wrongfully judged etc so
not dared go yet but shall. Also low on energy. Have a few people live
far away i would love to be with including a romantic interest. Could
say we been in contact "online" as its not in person so to say. If some
one is depressed , what would i advise? Depends who they are and
circumstances. Exercise, forums, asking for help are a few . But maybe a
symptom is exhaustion and one has no music to pump up with and who can
one ask for help and what when forum does not help. My body has pretty
much not been touched in 3 years , no friends nada and specially after
cancer wuld love cuddle , massage and one say :give yourself one. True :
why dont i. One could indeed sit down and massage ones hands for a good
ten minutes. Is that also a part of depression , not grooming so well
and if lack of energy. My latest thought is to start attending church,
try do exercise of some kind, eat better, groom body better, clear up
legal matters in court now regarding my work and finances and
realestate. And keep faith love and "my people" i miss and love will
come be with me soon. Have volunteer worked a bit also. I do not know of
any one who is so lonely as i. Every one seems have friends and contacts
, specially at such a age. Even old people with no family seem have very
active social and love life . People speak "watch a movie together", go
out for lunch and they always do these things. I have never really done
these things, socially and thats just not ok. ive been giving love and
work( but not been working physically with my body) but dont get back.
dont feel good or happy can not seem to articulate myself well as i
speak another language that most do not know and that is a part of my
court case that i am educated and worked hard but not had it
acknowledged. Advise for myself..... to do mean while Finish of court
case and legal matters start exercise and eat better study read,
volunteer untill my work and finances been acknowledged Attend church
(afraid) take up a new activity, learn some thing new go horse riding
start to groom better such as paint nails and keep maintnance of it do
sweet things to self until lovelife happens such as massage hands keep
the faith keep working determined to get my legal rights met and receive
what is legally mine. go and play in water with myself like jump and
skip and keep playful (maybe one day a friend will join me) lol (that is
some one i actually want as a friend) (in court restrainingorder long
story) try baking (no fun baking for self) (bake anyway) cookies,
buns.... awake passion to do so. Will think of some more things. Still,
what do those things help with love life, social inclusion, restraining
order (in court for that one) forums have not helped me either feel
connection. had one man chated with 3 yrs (that was 7 yrs ago)but then
computer was hacked. sure we can think of more things that are uplifting
so to say God bless
How do I talk to my doctor?
