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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Alel Constantly feel like a character
  • replies: 1

Whenever smth would happen in my life, I would catch myself acting like I'm in a story. I feel like I'm constantly acting. I don't know who I am and how I really feel about things. I recently got diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression. And I'm ... View more

Whenever smth would happen in my life, I would catch myself acting like I'm in a story. I feel like I'm constantly acting. I don't know who I am and how I really feel about things. I recently got diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression. And I'm afraid I'm going to make this my whole "life story" instead of just living life like everyone else. I'm afraid itll become my whole personality and I'll just self sabtoage for this story my brain is making up. I tend to self sabotage when things go well because I think I'm supposed to live a sad life because that's the story I made in my head. Why can I not just be happy and get better without feeling like smth is off? I cant imagine myself getting better. I just see myself suffering and trying to get better, but will always be sad. Like I live in those sad stories where I'm destined to be unhappy and everyone feels bad. It sounds so childish and attention seeking but i can't stop. My anxiety and depression I know are real. They are smth I can't control and they are the only time I actually know what's happening with me. But when I'm feeling okay, I don't know who I am, or what I like, what I want to do or how to just exist. I still have trauma to heal from, learn to cope with anxiety and depression, finding a purpose in my life and overcoming many many fears. Can someone explain what this is or tell me if this is normal?

lisa1987 Pregancy and anxiety trying to concieve
  • replies: 2

I have been wanting a baby for the last 8 years and that feeling never goes away, I just have alot of anxiety and barriers I'm wondering if there's any mums to be or people who are on their trying to concieve journey with a mental illness and anxiety... View more

I have been wanting a baby for the last 8 years and that feeling never goes away, I just have alot of anxiety and barriers I'm wondering if there's any mums to be or people who are on their trying to concieve journey with a mental illness and anxiety daily that can give me some advice or hope that it can work out even with anxiety I am 36 now so I don't have unlimited time it just sucks because i don't know if I will ever be ready or in that right place

John1701 I feel lost, tired, anxious, depressed, no energy
  • replies: 3

About a month ago I went to a work going away party. I am a new father, my boy has just turned one. I thought this would be a great night to unwind for the first time for over a year and a half. As much as I love my son more than anything, fatherhood... View more

About a month ago I went to a work going away party. I am a new father, my boy has just turned one. I thought this would be a great night to unwind for the first time for over a year and a half. As much as I love my son more than anything, fatherhood stresses me out more than anything that preceded it. The night was a perfect storm as everyone bought me drinks. As the night progressed my memory and cognitive function lessened. I can't remember exactly how much I drank but it would be close to 20 standard drinks(extremely irresponsible) and something I haven't done since I was 21. Though I thought it rude to decline a single one. A friend who used to work at the company who had shown up that night. Asked to see my house which I was building near by the pub we were at that night. Around midnight when the pub closed I vaguely remember getting in her car and arriving at my future home. I stumbled around the half built home showing her around the various rooms. I remember giving her a hug goodbye when I finished the tour to which she turned it into a kiss. Me not pulling out of the kiss has left me scarred beyond what I thought possible. The last thing I remember that night was her strongly advising me to get in her car. I declined and immediately walked to my parents and called my wife to what had transpired. Since this I feel all sorts of emotions from betrayal, depression, anxiety, guilt and night time panic attacks. I don't know if I feel like the perpetrator or the victim, or somewhere in between. As the ex work friend was sober enough to make the decision to take me in my extremely inebriated state to a secluded destination to take advantage of me. But also me not strong enough to pull out of the kiss in time and putting myself in that position in the first place. My wife and family have forgiven me but I can not forgive myself as this is far out of my character. I feel like I'm spiralling as I have never broke my moral compass like this before. I apologise for rambling to all who read, I am currently on medication to stabilise me but I'm afraid I'll never recover fully to be whole for my family who need me most. This is the lowest point of my life.

Mullows Struggling
  • replies: 2

This is my first discussion as I have tried everything I thought that this might help. About 6 years ago my wife left me because I was away for work too much and I took it so badly I tried to take my own life and from there because I had depression i... View more

This is my first discussion as I have tried everything I thought that this might help. About 6 years ago my wife left me because I was away for work too much and I took it so badly I tried to take my own life and from there because I had depression it took me 2 years to even get to see my kids unsupervised. Around that time my father was diagnosed with cancer and I took on the role of his primary caregiver which was the hardest job I have ever done. In short we became best mates and he fought the hardest fight I have ever seen the human body fight against and unfortunately he passed away 4 months into Covid and again I tried to take my own life as my kids had stopped talking to me for reasons I wish I understood and they were surrounded by my ex wife’s family who I could only imagine said nothing but bad things about me. So again I tried to take my own life and came close but was back in the same battles. I am struggling to even leave the house and am scared of my own shadow, I live on my own but I’m not really living I’m just surviving with no love or happiness in my life….

Kapteinen My girlfriend is depressed and stuck - might leave the country
  • replies: 1

Hi all, I’m posting here as I’m all out of ideas or good conversation to have with my girlfriend. Me and my girlfriend are both from Norway, living in Australia. I moved here initially for uni, and as she is studying online she decided to move down w... View more

Hi all, I’m posting here as I’m all out of ideas or good conversation to have with my girlfriend. Me and my girlfriend are both from Norway, living in Australia. I moved here initially for uni, and as she is studying online she decided to move down with me. We are both due to move back home either July or November 2024 depending on my enrolment.Before leaving for Australia she did start a downwards curve as the uni she applied to and is now studying online at wasn’t what she expected. We were both living in Oslo (not together) and her uni wasn’t very social and it only had like 1 lecture a week, additionally most of her friends were living in different cities so already here she was feeling slightly alone from time to time. In the end she decided she might as well be uneasy in beautiful Australia with me than being alone in Norway. Long story short - her situation is rooted in her life in general, but moving here has worsened it at an alarming rate.Fast forward to now - we are both living here, but she has no friends, no physical uni to attend or go to, and she struggled a lot getting a job with no luck. For the past month or so she has gotten gradually worse waking up and going to bed depressed, we have a lot of nice moments together and laugh a lot but ultimately she is growing more and more frustrated with her situation. She feels a lack of purpose, which might be due to her having no passion or hobbies (still figuring her life out, fair enough) and that combined with little to no social life and no job or routines to keep her afloat she seems like she is drowning. Both me and her are trying to include her more in my social life, and to add some structure otherwise - like going to study at the library while I’m at uni, or to come study with me at my campus and such, along with social stuff with my friends from uni. However nothing feels quite "real", permanent or her own she says, and though it helps a little, it doesn’t to much in the grand scheme of her situation.Now she is unsure of whether or not she should stay and keep pushing through, leave me and travel the country, or go back home to Norway - and in that case whether or not we should do long distance for over a year before I get home or if she should break up with me. We did long distance for 6 months and it was excruciating, however we both love each other and both feel like once we land back in Norway we are good to go and start our lives together for real. I suggested we should pull through as a couple no matter what she does, but she feels desperate and anxious and feels she is choosing between different "evils" and that breaking up - making a serious change - is at least a change.I agree that SOMETHING needs to happen, be that getting a job and routines to give her purpose on a day to day basis, or move back home. However with her emotional and mental state fluctuating a lot, I suggested maybe getting professional help to sort out her head and help justify or solidify whatever decision she lands on.I am at a loss and I can tell I am getting more and more frustrated myself as her state just gets worse and I am running out of smart things to say about it. There is nothing I can currently do and I feel like I am watching the love of my life slowly crumble to bits.

luke95 Needing help.
  • replies: 3

Needing some advise and a bit of support.im 28 years old who holds a relatively stable job and stable household with my mum and grandma.12 months ago I starting dating again after splitting with my fiancé whom we were together for 6 years. We had bui... View more

Needing some advise and a bit of support.im 28 years old who holds a relatively stable job and stable household with my mum and grandma.12 months ago I starting dating again after splitting with my fiancé whom we were together for 6 years. We had built a house and both working stable jobs, to find out she was being deceitful and borderline cheating on me with a girl. Since then coming out as gay. We split, sold the house and left on amicable terms. I began dating a new girl 12 months ago who still had a close friendship with her ex-boyfriend. After many attempts to steer her from contact with her ex, she was still partially attached, lied and said some things to him that indicated she missed him. Since that point about 9 months ago there has been multiple attempts to forgive and build trust walls but happened on another 3 occasions of being lied too. I don’t have many friends and can come across as stubborn and it has started to really hurt my mental health over the last few months coming to this realisation. We have what you would call split but am attempting to still talk however her behaviour is extremely shady and never getting the full picture. I struggle lots with self confidence and am easily put down by the thought of being lied to or cheated on by her with all these “friends” she has. It has got to the point where I have began to self harm to feel some sort of feeling that isn’t that. I just want a friend. Someone that I can talk to about this. I have tried to start swimming and get into routine like making my bed and getting to work far earlier then I need to but my mind is in pieces trying to get better. It’s becoming very tough. All I need is a friend.

Red Wheelbarrow Back here again
  • replies: 4

I can't believe I feel like this again. Ive been living with depression of various intensity for almost all my adult life. Im 67. I had been feeling so good for nearly a year and now I can't even move from a chair without effort. Im trying all the tr... View more

I can't believe I feel like this again. Ive been living with depression of various intensity for almost all my adult life. Im 67. I had been feeling so good for nearly a year and now I can't even move from a chair without effort. Im trying all the tricks of the trade, meditation, living in the now, CBT, but I'm still under water. I worry about every thing I say or write in emails, frightened that I've upset people. It seems to be a lot of little things that build up. This time I think the final straw was my sister being admitted to hospital unable to walk and covered in a rash . She is an alcoholic. She was in hospital for over 4 weeks and was doing so well I thought I had my sister back. When she was discharged she started drinking again with her husband buying the alcohol. I thought it probable, but it completely flawed me. I am so angry with him and her. She has a son and grandchildren. I'm an alcoholic too but I have not had a drink for 21 years and it makes me mad that she was so clever and lovely and now she is a train wreck who can't string a sentence together. I know this isn't about them but it's about me. I am so sick of this roundabout. I'm wasting my life with this but can't stay happy. I have a loving husband and sons and 2 gorgeous granddaughters I should be jumping for joy every day. I hate this so much.

Richju That low, low energy
  • replies: 1

It started yesterday. I had had a better night's sleep than I had had for a long time but felt tired in the morning. My granddaughter visited but was happy to play with playdough and when my son picked her up I had lunch and returned to bed. I slept ... View more

It started yesterday. I had had a better night's sleep than I had had for a long time but felt tired in the morning. My granddaughter visited but was happy to play with playdough and when my son picked her up I had lunch and returned to bed. I slept till 4 p.m. but returned to bed at 7.30 p.m. and still felt tired this morning. So I've allowed myself the day in bed, sleeping till lunch time. I feel a bit more lively now and listening to my favourite music, also played a few games of scrabble on my mobile and I'm contemplating a shower in a while. I haven't had a depressive bout like this for years and previously I would force myself to exercise and do my housework so I just wanted to let everyone know how much I've grown. Grandpa Depression you're nearly dead.Ruchju

Halogrl Depression
  • replies: 1

I am soo badly depressed right now. I don’t know how to find the help

I am soo badly depressed right now. I don’t know how to find the help