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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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pawsy Seeing a psychologist isnt really working
  • replies: 13

I hoped that seeing a psychologist would slowly but surely steer me out of depression and isolation, and back into the world of social contact and proper employment again. I have been seeing a psychologist for 18 months now and while it has been an e... View more

I hoped that seeing a psychologist would slowly but surely steer me out of depression and isolation, and back into the world of social contact and proper employment again. I have been seeing a psychologist for 18 months now and while it has been an enormous relief to tell someone what has been going on inside me, and feeling the hurt and painful feelings instead of just pushing them aside as I do with other people, i'm not actually getting out of my isolation or feelings of fear and unconfidence. It's just that im telling someone and they are being kind about it. In some ways I feel further away from meaningful social contact than I did before. Not that the psychologist has made things worse, just that talking about my sadness doesnt change the conditions that make me sad: unemployment, loneliness, parents dying. How can i ever get better? Will i ever be happy in the world again, make new friends, feel valued again? Or will it always be this now ... for the next how long? 40 years? Fearful, withdrawn, worthless. How is everyone else going? Is there anyone who got very socially isolated, who has found a way back to contact with others? Id be so grateful if someone has ... and could share how it happened. best wishes, pawsy

jburrows I'm not who I thought I was
  • replies: 3

I suffered depression, anxiety and psychosis as a kid. It was without a doubt, the hardest time of my life. Now at over 30 years old with 4 kids I thought those times were behind me, until recently. I was doing all the 'right' things, getting a house... View more

I suffered depression, anxiety and psychosis as a kid. It was without a doubt, the hardest time of my life. Now at over 30 years old with 4 kids I thought those times were behind me, until recently. I was doing all the 'right' things, getting a house and a career. I was doing everything that you're supposed to do. And I thought I was strong enough to do it all, but I think it all just became too much. I've all but abandoned my work which I can't do with a mortgage. Last time I was going through this I was a kid without any responsibility, now I'm an adult and a father and everyone looks up to you to do the things that you just know you can't do. And your partner says she's there for you but you can just see that all you're doing is draining her of her own emotional reserves. Where does it end? I had a vision of who I wanted to be for my family and it turns out I'm not that person. I'm not strong enough to be who I wanted to be and I don't know what to do to get back to where I want to be.

MermaidLady23 My Life Feels Pointless
  • replies: 2

I don't know if anyone will read this or respond. This is my first post on here. If anyone here is reading I just want to say thank you. I've been struggling a lot with depression, anxiety and feeling worthless for a while now. Especially around this... View more

I don't know if anyone will read this or respond. This is my first post on here. If anyone here is reading I just want to say thank you. I've been struggling a lot with depression, anxiety and feeling worthless for a while now. Especially around this time of year. I'm 22-Years-Old and for nearly three years I've been working part-time in retail and hospitality. Prior to that I was unemployed for a long time and it hit me really bad with my self-worth. I'm grateful to be working the last couple years now but I still struggle a great deal. At age 22 I expected to have my life stable and to be a fully independent individual. I see all over social media people I graduated high school with four years ago now getting engaged, moving out, travelling and finishing college. Meanwhile, I'm working part-time, still living at home, still on my L's, though I've done over 70 hours driving now and I'm.going to be sitting my drivers test this year. I'm only just managing to get by and to save for a car, I dropped out of university when I was 19 due to not knowing what I wanted and being unable to cope. I did a Certificate III in Aged Care in 2018 and completed it but I feel I even struggled with that and I'm scared to go in to a new field of work. I love to help others and make people happy but I feel like I'll mess up as I had a hard time with everything. I am also lonely, try as I might to seem upbeat and happy I have no close friends. I blame myself for my past in being not the most positive person to be around. I understand my flaws and people's reasoning to maybe why they don't speak to me. That bring sad I've also been deserted many times by friends, can't open up to family and my psychologist I can't see until the end of the month. I want to go to college again someday but my mind isn't ready and I'm struggling mentally. I suffer from BPD, anxiety and depression. I feel like a failure and like I live a vicious cycle with mental health, always coming back to feeling like this no matter how much I try. I take antideppressants, recently started going to the gym and I still feel horrible. I'm ashamed for not going to uni or having my life together either. Am I alone in this? Will it always be like this? Am I a failure and stupid like I tell myself? I just needed to vent. Thank you for reading this far.

RoseToez Sick of being told tales!
  • replies: 2

I am utterly sick to death of people making up or exgerating stories just to upset me. I don't understand why people make things up at all.. don't they hear what comes out of their mouth? It's really been effecting me lately.. to the point I'm depres... View more

I am utterly sick to death of people making up or exgerating stories just to upset me. I don't understand why people make things up at all.. don't they hear what comes out of their mouth? It's really been effecting me lately.. to the point I'm depressed for days. I just get better then someone tells me something.. I look into it and what do you know it's a lie and I look like an idiot. I'm a single mum of 2 under 4, everyone knows I'm not coping very well. My ex who I left 5 months ago has a 21 year old girlfriend living with him, I was obsessing over it really badly.. but are getting better until this happens all over again. My dad did it for his own pleasure and a family friend has been coming out with really out there stuff. I dont know why theyre doing this! I find it hard to just ignore it because once ive heard it i cant stop thinking about it. I have no social media, I'm just sick of it!

Chapin Poem - Men's struggle
  • replies: 3

Hi, I wrote this poem about how I was feeling being a man suffering depression. It's not meant to be a male only thing, but of course I don't know what it is like facing depression as a woman! There are some of us who live our lives according to conv... View more

Hi, I wrote this poem about how I was feeling being a man suffering depression. It's not meant to be a male only thing, but of course I don't know what it is like facing depression as a woman! There are some of us who live our lives according to convention, Knowing there's a part of us we don’t feel free to mention To others we don't wish to hurt, or who wouldn't understand, The daily inner struggle that in our lives was never planned It happens to so many, different backgrounds, different ages And unfolds just like a story, as we slowly turn life’s pages As we battle with the sadness deep inside that’s always there And at times it seems to reach the point we simply cannot bear Loving husbands, caring fathers, in a never ending fight As we struggle with our demons, ever present dark as night And we hold it in, aware that it can tear our lives apart Too frightened to reveal the truth, and share what’s in our heart We think no-one can understand the pain and isolation The complexity, the sadness with no easy explanation And we ask ourselves, what have I done to end up with this life- That delivers me such hopelessness and never ending strife? We wonder how can we go on, get through another night? And every day before us is the constant, endless fight Why me ? what will I become?, how will this anguish end? But we tell ourselves for now at least, “just continue to pretend” Our depression seems so constant, causing conflict and divisions And we worry that ahead of us are difficult decisions For we are caught, just like a trap, we are not really free And for some of us we think that is the way it has to be But we need not walk this road alone, there are many who do care And if we open up our feelings, and be prepared to share We will find that there’s assistance, a friendly helping hand From people who have empathy, who really understand There is help and great resources, and we all should make that choice But it does take strength and courage to release our inner voice Remember we are decent men just living life the best we can And our inner secret doesn't mean, we're any less a man.

Rabbit33 Depression mood swings depending on the weather?
  • replies: 7

Is it just me or do others tend to find that there depression heightens when the weather is cold, dark and gloomy and then when the weather is beautiful, blue skies, nice warm breeze, suddenly you feel a whole lot better as if the depression almost l... View more

Is it just me or do others tend to find that there depression heightens when the weather is cold, dark and gloomy and then when the weather is beautiful, blue skies, nice warm breeze, suddenly you feel a whole lot better as if the depression almost left with the ugly weather? I asked my Psychologist the other month and she said that some people are actually emotionally affected by the weather a lot more than others and it can make our depression worse during the colder months! If so, does this mean if i travelled around the world, always surrounding myself with blue skies, warmer days and sunny atmospheres that i would concur my depression? And, just my luck to live in Melbourne where in 1 day, we can experience all 4 seasons, Wet, Sunny, Windy, Dark, Sunny, Windy!! No wonder I'm struggling haha

Bbool Squalor and self-neglect
  • replies: 9

Hi everyone I am extremely embarrasssd about what I am going to share, but here goes. On the face of it, I am a 33 year old with a modest job, live in the city in a small apartment that I own. Some may think I’m successful. In reality I have had seve... View more

Hi everyone I am extremely embarrasssd about what I am going to share, but here goes. On the face of it, I am a 33 year old with a modest job, live in the city in a small apartment that I own. Some may think I’m successful. In reality I have had severe depression for many years and have zero self-worth. A lot of it stems from childhood trauma. I am currently going through the following: 1. I live in squalor. My home is extremely filthy with rubbish everywhere on the floor, clothes everywhere, dusty, cobwebs etc. Things need to be repaired. My home stinks but I’m so used to it I don’t notice the smell anymore. I am so deeply ashamed and embarrassed about my living circumstances I make excuses to friends/family to not invite them over. This is not a lifestyle choice, I hate it. But I am so overwhelmed by the squalor I don’t know what to do or where to start. I fee paralysed by my lack of motivation. 2. Self neglect. For example, although I shower everyday, I don’t wash my hair frequently. I only wash my hair once a month or two. It’s itchy and I get scabs on my head. I have long curly hair down to my waist that most people would say is beautiful. I hide it by tying it back in a bun. I love the feeling of clean freshly washed hair, but I just can’t bring myself to do it. I struggle doing basic tasks at home like pay the bills on time (not because I can’t afford it). I can’t explain it, it’s like a strong brick wall in my head stopping me from doing tasks. I also compulsively pick my skin. I have scabs/sores on my chest, legs and worst of all my face. I have had this one scab on my face for 3 years because of the urge to pick. My mum once made a comment that the scab on my face makes me look like a meth user (I don’t do drugs and I rarely drink, though I am a heavy smoker). There are other things but I won’t go into detail. i literally feel like trash. Has anyone else experienced forms of self neglect and squalor? How did you tackle it? Does anyone know of any online support groups for squalor?

Florek When you feel nothing is going right
  • replies: 10

Hi all, so lately my emotions are out of control not only do I feel like everyone is on a different page then me I know they are never in my life would I put someone down to feel good about my self, I’ve resentently decovered that no one else seems t... View more

Hi all, so lately my emotions are out of control not only do I feel like everyone is on a different page then me I know they are never in my life would I put someone down to feel good about my self, I’ve resentently decovered that no one else seems to think the same way . I started a new job and found that working with people is way harder then I remember, I am finding it hard and at the moment I’m just not able to cope with the smallest this without bursting into tears ive always been such a strong person and I don’t understand why this is happening the last few years has been mentally and physically straining, I’ve been really sick and I don’t mean cancer, but it was bigger then the flu, I went from being able to run to not even being able to stand with out being in constant pain. I’m now at the point I can stand for 15 mins before pain sets in still really can’t walk for to long I get around 20mins before needing a rest but I still can’t shift the weight that was stacked on with all the hormones that were unbalanced . at that point I was feeling low and angry so I went to see my doc and got some meds they seamed to have worked and I was not as angry or upset all the time, deciding I wanted to make the choice to go of them I was so wrong I’ve started a new job and the bull that comes with that has sent me on a mental downwards spiral , I spent all last night crying my eyes are so sore today I can barely see what I am typing, i had a script of a mild does of my meds so last night I started on them again and I’m booked into see a doc on Friday. im just wanting to talk to someone I just can’t control anything now and I thought if I can have a chat it may help any one up for a chat ?

Guppy123 So confused don’t know how to keep self on track
  • replies: 1

Hi.. first post that hopefully passes the rules!! Need some staying on track over ‘festive’ season where judt feel like a loser (who can’t type!!!). bipolar 2, recently been hospital for overdose and had ect, precious/ continue eating disorders: issu... View more

Hi.. first post that hopefully passes the rules!! Need some staying on track over ‘festive’ season where judt feel like a loser (who can’t type!!!). bipolar 2, recently been hospital for overdose and had ect, precious/ continue eating disorders: issues . been trying to stay off the piss bit keep drinking when happy or sad. Feel like loser and keep doing it - 2 kids 9 and 11 and struggle to read to them when on the piss. Bring such bad example but otherwise good to them. failing self, kids and hubby what s fool I am dont know how to stop would think being hospitalised would fix but have realised have so few real friends, hard to feel that any one I see gives a damn. Of all people I know only 3 people made contact her I was in the nut house. No one from my full time work - been there 7 years, they send flowers to everyone else who is crook,! Find it hard to work out what is wrong with me.

mmmmmmm I can't stop thinking about sad things?
  • replies: 12

But not sad things in my life, my life is actually great. I think about completely random things. The level of sadness completely varies. E.g. sometimes it would just be a father and son having an argument, but sometimes it would be a man being dying... View more

But not sad things in my life, my life is actually great. I think about completely random things. The level of sadness completely varies. E.g. sometimes it would just be a father and son having an argument, but sometimes it would be a man being dying violently in front of his wife. Yep, that escalated quickly. There are others, those are just two examples. You're probably thinking it represents something that's happened in my life, but it really didn't. I have a great relationship with my parents, and I've never witnessed real death or violence. I don't think it's depression, because I'm not exactly sad for no reason. I start off completely happy, but then I get these thoughts, and I feel really sad for the next few hours. What could it be?