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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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PastaTime Feeling like I'll never be good enough
  • replies: 1

I've been trying to get my life in order and do things that make me happy, but it just feels like I put in so much effort to get very little results. I want to make my art into a business but because of how I function with adhd and other commitments,... View more

I've been trying to get my life in order and do things that make me happy, but it just feels like I put in so much effort to get very little results. I want to make my art into a business but because of how I function with adhd and other commitments, it feels like I'll have to give up that career because I don't make much money from it and I don't have a large enough audience.But when I think of having to take on other work to survive, it just makes me depressed because I'm not good at anything else and the only work that pays well would make me unhappy. I feel stuck and that I'll never get achieve my goals and that I've wasted my whole life up to this point, it makes me wish I didn't have to live in this world because I'd be unhappy no matter what choice I have to make.I wish I was able to change, but after 30+ years change feel impossible at this point

Earth Girl What to do when people say things like this
  • replies: 5

My parents say really racist things. My Mum often says things like "Those Asian people" "A police officer was chasing an Asian man because... and then the Asian man..." "There's this Asian woman on this show who I don't really trust... I think it mig... View more

My parents say really racist things. My Mum often says things like "Those Asian people" "A police officer was chasing an Asian man because... and then the Asian man..." "There's this Asian woman on this show who I don't really trust... I think it might partly be because she is Asian" "I don't like saying certain sayings like you're welcome because it's very American" "I don't like annoying American accents." (She once also impersonated the way Asian people speak, and she was mumbling when she did it and not even saying any words). When I was little, since my parents kept talking about how evil Americans are, I thought they must have been really mean people. My Mum was reading us a picture book, and she said, "Typical Americans, they don't know how to draw." About 5 years ago I think it was, I asked her why she didn't like Americans and she said, "Because they think they are better than us!" I said most of them probably don't think that and she went "Oh yes they do!" She also says things like "There was a very nice black man at... today" and the other day she said, "Dad and I went for a walk, and there were two men there and one of them was black." When she finished the story, I asked what him being black had to do with anything and she said that she was just talking about his appearance (even though there was no need to). I mean, if I was asking what someone looked like because I was trying to find them then it would be okay to say, "They are tall, have dark skin, etc.", but she'll say that people are black or Asian when there's literally no need to. My Dad was watching a show and he said "Wow, she's dark haha." Why do they feel the need to say these things!? I've tried to explain to them that there's no need to say these things and that every culture has nice and not nice people in them and that I've known lots of really nice people who are Asian. But they just get annoyed with me and my Mum says "Fine, I just won't talk to you about this sort of thing then" and I said Well, I've told you before that I don't want to hear it! My Mum has also told me that she doesn't think that I should worry about being politically correct because it's a waste of time. I can't cut my parents out for many reasons, but even if I could, they would make me feel bad and say, "We may not be perfect." Everyone thinks they are so nice, but they have no idea how temperamental they are, and they act very differently outside than they often do inside the house.

Guest_21750272 Moving to a new place and regretting my life decisions
  • replies: 2

Don’t really know how to word this well but I’ve recently moved to a new place and I wish I could move back to what I am familiar with being closer to family. Also struggling with my past life decisions, financial and having no friends after moving. ... View more

Don’t really know how to word this well but I’ve recently moved to a new place and I wish I could move back to what I am familiar with being closer to family. Also struggling with my past life decisions, financial and having no friends after moving. I guess just wanting some advice and what others have done to help, just feels like nothings going right as I get older and I just feel stuck:(

Guest_35370081 Angered
  • replies: 1

My wife an i have been happily married for 18 yrs we have had the odd argument but nothing major recently i had a birthday which my wife threw a surprise party which i really enjoyed 2 days later idestroyed Xmas for my wife, we had a heated argument ... View more

My wife an i have been happily married for 18 yrs we have had the odd argument but nothing major recently i had a birthday which my wife threw a surprise party which i really enjoyed 2 days later idestroyed Xmas for my wife, we had a heated argument 2 days before Xmas, I lost my cool and pushed her not meaning harm, but she feel over, I accepted full blame and apologised profusely, she say she's fine and we're fine, but I know we're not the love has left her, I am afraid I have broken the one thing in this world that means anything to me. I am so ashamed and hate myself for what I have done to her, she won't talk about the future in depth. Is it over?

Guest_09781325 That time of year?
  • replies: 3

Hi, posting as I don’t know what to do or where to turn. I’ve suffered depression most of my life but had been doing well lately. This week everything feels like it used to, and due to recent (past few months) false allegations about me and cyber bul... View more

Hi, posting as I don’t know what to do or where to turn. I’ve suffered depression most of my life but had been doing well lately. This week everything feels like it used to, and due to recent (past few months) false allegations about me and cyber bullying I have only a few friends who are too busy to talk to me. I think social media have a false else of people in my life. It’s my 40th birthday tomorrow so I don’t know if it’s just this combined with Christmas, nothing has happened but I can’t pull myself up & feel like I’m falling deeper into a black hole

booga suddenly dont feel like talking to anyone
  • replies: 2

all of a sudden, i just dont want to talk. just like, in general. even over text. i love my best friend and theyre one of my favorite people, but suddenly i just,, dont want to talk to them. its not that we're growing apart, they might be getting a c... View more

all of a sudden, i just dont want to talk. just like, in general. even over text. i love my best friend and theyre one of my favorite people, but suddenly i just,, dont want to talk to them. its not that we're growing apart, they might be getting a computer tomorrow so we can play games together, and its not like i dont like them. i just dont feel like talking. i dont know whats wrong with me and i feel guilty about it

Quilter57 Getting over depression inertia
  • replies: 2

I have had depression for years. It is being treated with meds and lifestyle changes. I have been suicidal in the past. I also have AUD and am on medication for it. Christmas was horrible this year due to estrangement from my DIL. I can't say anythin... View more

I have had depression for years. It is being treated with meds and lifestyle changes. I have been suicidal in the past. I also have AUD and am on medication for it. Christmas was horrible this year due to estrangement from my DIL. I can't say anything to family cos my daughter bent over backwards to make it nice for us. I appreciate that. I had been doing well , but have fallen in a heap. No motivation, don't care about anything, exhausted just playing games on my phone. There are things I'd like to do but can't push myself. Hubby and I are not talking. We have a good marriage, but he is very angry with DIL and I want to reconcile. So I don't know what to do. I know the medication im on exacerbate depression and suicidal ideation so going to see my Dr on Jan 8th.

Guest_10343 Taking small steps when depression makes everything feel heavy
  • replies: 4

Hi everyone,I’ve been reading through a lot of the posts here and finally felt ready to share something of my own. Depression has been part of my life for a while now, and lately it feels less like intense sadness and more like a constant heaviness a... View more

Hi everyone,I’ve been reading through a lot of the posts here and finally felt ready to share something of my own. Depression has been part of my life for a while now, and lately it feels less like intense sadness and more like a constant heaviness and lack of energy. Even simple things, getting out of bed, replying to messages, taking care of myself, can feel overwhelming. Some days I don’t feel “bad enough” to justify how hard things feel, which then just adds guilt on top of everything else. I know logically that depression doesn’t always have a clear reason, but emotionally it’s hard not to question myself. One thing I’ve been slowly trying is breaking help into smaller pieces. Sometimes that’s just talking things through online rather than face to face, or checking in briefly with a GP or mental health professional when I don’t feel up to a full appointment. I’ve used a couple of telehealth services like Hola Health Beyond blue, abby and while it didn’t fix everything, it did make reaching out feel a bit less daunting on low days. What I’m still struggling with is consistency, keeping up routines and self-care when motivation is basically non-existent. I wanted to ask:What small things have helped you when depression feels flat and draining rather than intense?How do you get yourself started when everything feels like too much?Has anyone else found low-pressure ways of reaching out for support helpful?Thanks for reading. Just being able to write this out already feels like a small step.Sending strength to anyone else who’s having a hard time right now.

phightingphan I hate art
  • replies: 3

Art is probably one of the only good coping mechanisms I have in life. For as long as I can remember, I've loved to just... pick up a pencil and draw. Or open up a drawing application and draw on it. However, lately, for the past year or so, I've sta... View more

Art is probably one of the only good coping mechanisms I have in life. For as long as I can remember, I've loved to just... pick up a pencil and draw. Or open up a drawing application and draw on it. However, lately, for the past year or so, I've started to despise drawing. I can never draw the way I want, and I'm aware I need to actually practice the fundamentals and practice and whatnot, but I have 0 energy and drive to do these things. Making art and seeing how ugly or disproportionate it is has genuinely caused me to have multiple breakdowns, because I realise how far behind I'm falling. I was so convinced I was ahead of other kids my age in art, but then going onto the internet and seeing the masterpieces people YOUNGER than me can make destroys me. "Be happy for them!" Like it's that easy for me, oh my GOD?? I try my best to be confident in my skills, but it is so soul-crushing to see that everyone else can somehow grasp these things that I'm unable to. I've tried to study a few times before, but I can never create study routines or good practice methods, or do things that actually stick in my brain, and it's like... am I missing something?? Is there just something wrong in my brain that doesn't let me understand/do these things? This is also the reason I'm falling academically. Studying is something that seems to come easier to others, but never to me. It is impossible, and when I try it, it's unenjoyable. It is NEVER fun. Which, I guess, you would assume it would be, but studying anything feels like hell. I refuse to learn anything at all. I've seen people say that I don't need to study art, but I want to! I want to get better, and I want to understand these things I just... can't. It's likely a matter of me having a very fixed mindset; I'm aware of it, too. But once again, I can never get up to fix it. Do you understand how it feels to see something I thought I was so good at, something I put endless hours into, being done 10x better by another teenager? Someone in the same position as I, someone who has lived the same time I have, someone who can do it better than I ever could dream of. It's not a competition, I'm aware, if anything, I should only be improving for myself, right? I know these things, but I can't believe them. I'm losing my passion. I hate art.

phightingphan I don't know what to do
  • replies: 6

I really don't know what to do with myself. I've gotten so lazy and apathetic that it's pushing me back. All I wanna do is play games and lie down and not talk to anyone. My family has noticed. Everyone has, for that matter. I'm not who I used to be,... View more

I really don't know what to do with myself. I've gotten so lazy and apathetic that it's pushing me back. All I wanna do is play games and lie down and not talk to anyone. My family has noticed. Everyone has, for that matter. I'm not who I used to be, I'm freshly 16 and I have no job or license or drive to do anything at all. My mum tells me to wake up and do something, or she tells me I can't do anything.I feel so hopeless I don't know what to do anymore. I need good grades, but I'm too lazy to get off my ass and I have nobody to blame but myself. I'm in fucking year 11 next year and I can't get a grip on anything, I have no solutions or anyone to lean on. I'm alone. I have trusted adults, or I thought I did, but I tried opening up to them and got shut down instantly. My friends can't help me, nobody can even tell I'm suffering so what the fuck do I even do??? Im so tired of everything and everyone I wish I could stop time, curl up into a ball and rot. For what reason??? I don't know. I don't know anything. Im burnt out and stupid and lazy and weird and ugly and slow I cant do anything right and I want to kill myself because of it.

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