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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 0

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Aussie.Girl Why can't I just be happy?
  • replies: 8

Apologies for the essay...I recently quit my job because I was feeling overwhelmed with stress and it was causing RSI as well as issues with my back and knees. I thought that afterwards I would have significantly less stress and I would be able to co... View more

Apologies for the essay...I recently quit my job because I was feeling overwhelmed with stress and it was causing RSI as well as issues with my back and knees. I thought that afterwards I would have significantly less stress and I would be able to complete some tasks which have been on my to do list for months. However, external factors are still getting in the way (the weather, getting sick etc) so I have basically made no progress at all. Anyway, I have been thinking for a long time that I would like to work from home in future and with the end of year sales I was able to purchase a laptop. I live with my family and we have a desktop computer but it is a shared device so I thought it would be good to get laptop just for me. I did loads of research and spent hours at the shop testing before deciding on a mid-range HP. As soon as I got to the car I panicked about the price (even though I have savings and it wasn't crazy expensive). Now I can't bring myself to open the box because as long as its still sealed I can return it for a 100% refund (I have 2wks to decide) I don't know what to do, I thought I would be happy with this but now I just feel guilty every time I look at the box because I didn't /need/ a laptop and I've never really spent that much on something not strictly necessary. I feel broken... This isn't the first time I've tried to do something fun or buy something nice only to feel guilty and anxious instead. What should I do? I can't even tell if I want the laptop anymore, it just makes me stressed to think about it. Why can't anything in my life just be simple? I'm trying so hard to do the right thing and I always end up stressed and upset afterwards. I just want to be able to live my life without feeling guilty for every little thing... I want to feel relaxed and happy and free. I left my job and I still feel trapped, and I don't know what to do... Please share any advice you think might help, and I would appreciate opinions on whether I should keep the laptop or just return it. Thank you

Guest_0845 Feeling like a total loser
  • replies: 2

I was hoping I wouldnt have to do this again but here I go... I feel like the biggest total loser, never good enough for anyone, never good enough at anything, im totally over trying. Im at point of giving up, no matter what i do, I end up worss off.... View more

I was hoping I wouldnt have to do this again but here I go... I feel like the biggest total loser, never good enough for anyone, never good enough at anything, im totally over trying. Im at point of giving up, no matter what i do, I end up worss off. Im of no use at all to anybody, never had been. I dont have any friends, I have the socials skills of fence post. I feel all i do is just get in useful people way. Might be time to end it all i guess.

nurse91 Partner blaming me for his suicidal thoughts
  • replies: 4

This is going to be a long one. Partner and i have been togther nearly 7 years and they have been up and down. We did 3 years long distance for career reasons after being together for 2 years. We have now been living together for 2 years. In the begi... View more

This is going to be a long one. Partner and i have been togther nearly 7 years and they have been up and down. We did 3 years long distance for career reasons after being together for 2 years. We have now been living together for 2 years. In the begining i will openly admit i was 100% the problem. I had untreated anxiety, depression and ADHD - related to life long trauma and i was alot to handle. I have since become medicated and taken back control of my life and i think although not perfect i do strive to become a better person everyday. I thought my history is relevant as i do not want to paint the picture that my partner has not been there for me in the past. Fast forward to now. My partner is going through a lengthy and very stressful time in his life, financially, mentally and physically. I do my best to help with this however recently i tried having a gentle conversation about a few of my own insecurities and difficulties (tried having this conversation many times) and eventually it ended in an arguement where he said i dont help him at all, i make things more difficult for him and he has sucidal thought a because of the extra pressure i put on him. I am now stuck in the situation where i want to leave to give him the space he needs because i dont want to make him want to kill himself but i cant leave because i dont want him to be alone and i dont want him to feel abandoned. I dont know what to do. I have mentioned getting help and couples therapy but he just says "all you have to do is be nice". I do all the house work and i work a full time job plus help him with his career. We havent been intimate for nearly 1.5 years and when i bring it up he says the same thing- "just be nice". I am willing to take some blame becauae i am far from perfect but what he said about the suicidal part and it being my fault has really shook me. Can someone please shed some light on this for me.Thanks

TBear5879 Please help
  • replies: 6

I have autism and ADHD and would like to get tested for depression. So, not a great start to life for me . feel so sad and energy less all the time, I just don't know what to do. Please help me.

I have autism and ADHD and would like to get tested for depression. So, not a great start to life for me . feel so sad and energy less all the time, I just don't know what to do. Please help me.

Musiclover10 Chronic pain and depression
  • replies: 5

Hi everyone, I am in a world of pain right now. Both physically and emotionally/psychologically. I have been experiencing physical pain for almost 2 months nonstop now. One of the issues has been jaw pain from a TMJ condition, which flares up every n... View more

Hi everyone, I am in a world of pain right now. Both physically and emotionally/psychologically. I have been experiencing physical pain for almost 2 months nonstop now. One of the issues has been jaw pain from a TMJ condition, which flares up every now and then. The pain has been ongoing and I feel it has led me to symptoms of anxiety and depression, which is now causing me to doubt and question everything. Including my new relationship. Just a couple of months ago, I was feeling happier than I ever have, so confident and so sure and on top of things. Now I feel the opposite. I have overcome depression many times before, but it just feels so hard this time as I am dealing with physical pain as well. I welcome any suggestions or insights as I am really struggling to get on top of it. Thank you

Loveanimals So Infuriated By Neighbours
  • replies: 8

One year ago there was an incredible storm here and the neighbours' carport collapsed and left tonnes of mud and detritus in my yard.( I have posted about this before ) At that time they immediately tried to put some onus on me. They never apologised... View more

One year ago there was an incredible storm here and the neighbours' carport collapsed and left tonnes of mud and detritus in my yard.( I have posted about this before ) At that time they immediately tried to put some onus on me. They never apologised or did anything to remove the mess. After investigating it transpired that their carport was non compliant and had no stormwater removal. Hence the storm was the straw that broke the camels back as there had been 11 years of water running off against the fence. When the neighbours learnt of this they were furious at me? Not my problem! They then tried to get me to pay $25k to go halves in a retaining wall. Again I investigated and it transpired that the house plans for their build (back in the '80's) had a retaining wall included....which was not built. Needless to say they were angry about this ..again..not my issue! They then tried to get $ from me thru the fencing act. I consulted with my lawyer who stated the entire cost is theirs and in fact I could sue them for damages. I did not pursue this, in fact offered them $1000 as a goodwill gesture (?) which is the paltry sum I received from my insurer. I sent them the letter from my lawyer explaining everything and they emailed me that they would accept the $1000. Very long story...works began on the retaining wall/fence 3 weeks ago! Understandably there has been noise and mess from dawn until early evening. What galls me is that these works were to take two weeks. It will be five weeks until completion. The neighbours have not once informed me of what is taking place, and when. On Friday I had a concrete truck blocking my driveway for over 2 hours. I wanted to say something but the concreter was rough and swearing contantly and I was scared. Further to this all of my washing was covered in concrete and I have had to dispose of some items. I had a beautiful bouganvillea tree alongside my carport. Doing the neighbourly thing I paid my gardener $50 to trim it back to allow ease of access for the workers. I went outside earlier and it is dead. It has fallen over from the stress of the drilling etc. The workers were very apologetic. They moved it onto the pile of dirt in front of my neighbours property. I then went outside to collect my bins and the neighbour was out front doing same. He totally ignored me and basically ran inside. I would have expected some words of apology but no...nothing. He is a gutless worm. I am so incensed at the lack of respect and regard shown towards me by these scummy people! I have tolerated this for over one year! Throughout this year I have witnessed their son throw their pool scum over my fence..they have used my bins for their rubbish...I have always been kind to them When they went overseas last year I put their bins out etc. They have proven themselves to be disgusting and disrespectful. I am also very heartbroken as I am always the nice guy. Look what that gets one. I feel bullied, laughed at and am totally furious. The one good thing is that I am seeing my lawyer next week. I may well pursue civil action against these filthy things. They should be sorry for messing with me. But at the end of the day their messing with me has almost destroyed me. I don't know....I will wait until next week to sort this. After everything that has happened lately I just end up hating most people. Also the people in my life who I bend over backwards for are yet again not there for me That is good. I now know that the only person I have to care for is me. I did ring Lifeline earlier as I was so absolutely besides myself. The counsellor was great and reiterated I have to stop being so nice to everyone else and start being nice to myself. My poor soul is very damaged and I need to restore it.

viciouscycle It’s a joke
  • replies: 2

I have a degenerative spinal disease have done since birth I’ve tryed working most of my life I have so many certs I’ve paid for myself to try different avenues of work and easier on my back and the chronic pain I suffer especially when it’s a daily ... View more

I have a degenerative spinal disease have done since birth I’ve tryed working most of my life I have so many certs I’ve paid for myself to try different avenues of work and easier on my back and the chronic pain I suffer especially when it’s a daily L5 disk pinching my S1 ouch really sux to name a few I have bobcat,excavator,HR,cert4 PT, fully qualified life guard,all my hospitality and gaming I can keep going paid for myself I might add.. anyway for atleast 10 years now they will except my disability for an 3 month exemption every 3 months and except it to put me with a disability provider but won’t except it for a disability payment or pension and expect me to work and now won’t except my doc certs wtf… in the very word degenerative means it gets worse and worse the system is a joke designed to make u fail and be forced off the payment one less payment they gotta dish out.. I’m also chronicle depressed and have anxiety and atleast 10yrs of history with all of these I have15 diff med certs I’ve uploaded and have shown just in past 3 yrs but not good enough so off I go to pay for more doc apps on an already not coping can’t survive as is payment with kids I get 790$ in bank a fortnight my rents 650 of that can go on and on and they wonder why suicidal thoughts creep into our heads but to scared to do it kids dnt deserve it I won’t give centerlink the satisfaction but feeling trapped and stuck is worse than it all wish I wasn’t on it u think I like this they treat us like where all drug addict dole bludgers fkn joke

noah55655 Im struggling
  • replies: 2

my life is shit I have always been over weight (I am also dyslexic and stage 1 autism and adhd) until my birthday last year I lost weight in 4 months I was going to the gym working but while i was at work one of my very close friends called me like 3... View more

my life is shit I have always been over weight (I am also dyslexic and stage 1 autism and adhd) until my birthday last year I lost weight in 4 months I was going to the gym working but while i was at work one of my very close friends called me like 3 4 times and I didn’t pick up i got home and didn’t call him back because I was too lazy and then 2 days later I went past his house and his parents told me he oded and I didn’t leave my room after that for almost 4 months my family brought me food and water i only left to use the bathroom i didn’t brush my teeth and barely showered now it’s been 8 months and ive been eating my self to death hoping one day i will just not wake up and i am getting very close to just ending it I feel too guilty.everyone is distancing themselves away from me and i have no one to talk to my gf broke up with me and barely have any human interaction

New_mum_of_1 Partner is depressed + newborn baby
  • replies: 10

Hi, my partner broke down a week ago and told me he is depressed. We have a 3 week old baby girl. He says he hasnt been happy for a long time (before baby) and then he told me he doesn't think he is in love with me anymore. He runs his own business a... View more

Hi, my partner broke down a week ago and told me he is depressed. We have a 3 week old baby girl. He says he hasnt been happy for a long time (before baby) and then he told me he doesn't think he is in love with me anymore. He runs his own business and has been experiencing extreme financial stress with that and also trying to open up a second small business. His plate is very full especially now with our baby and he is very overwhelmed. I am still heartbroken at the fact that he said he isn't sure he is in love with me anymore and cry everyday over this! I love this man more than anything and had no idea he was feeling this way. As far as I knew we were happy. I admit that with everything going on in the last year or so, we haven't been as "connected" as we once were and our relationship was lacking affection, intimacy and quality time together but he has still been the fun, happy, positive guy I love and adore up until a week ago. Im struggling to cope with this change in him, its so out of character. He has gone from being funny, happy and positive to miserable, angry and negative. Like someone has flipped a switch! I was hysterical in tears, shocked at what he was saying to me as I just can't imagine my life without him. During my pregnancy he seemed distant sometimes and now it breaks my heart because he has distanced himself so much from me and our baby that he is missing out on the special bonding time with her. He said he is going to get help but hasn't made the appointment yet and wont let me help. He is pushing me away, shutting me out, we are living like we are housemates. He wants to be alone and wants space. He helps with bub sometimes but is putting his time into the gym and the new business so is hardly home. He seems angry towards me like he is blaming me for all of this? I feel so alone and upset that we are going through this and not spending time as a family, and that he isn't spending quality time with our baby. I really want him to go to therapy so we can work through this and then work on fixing our relationship. He said he needs to sort himself out first. Its like he is suffering a mix of depression and postpartum depression. He is showing all of the signs. Im giving him the space he has asked for but I am really struggling. I've told my mum about it so that I have support but he won't speak to any mates or family. Im so heartbroken, lost, alone and don't know how to encourage him to take that first step to get help I miss him!!

Esplin-C Carer fatigue
  • replies: 4

I am a 67 year old single woman supporting my 40 year old son who has a degenerative neurological condition. He has an intellectual disability and struggles to cope with his declining speech and mobility. I have always struggled with my feelings of s... View more

I am a 67 year old single woman supporting my 40 year old son who has a degenerative neurological condition. He has an intellectual disability and struggles to cope with his declining speech and mobility. I have always struggled with my feelings of self worth and depression and have fought this most of my life. I am from a family and an era that sees depression and anxiety as a choice and a weakness. I see a counsellor and she is helpful. Currently I am struggling and I am feeling very inadequate and very much on my own. I am currently moving my son on to supported independent living and I am struggling with my feelings of worth as a parent as I know this transition is going to be very difficult for him. I am also facing a transition for myself from being busy caring for and supporting my son to living alone. My family are supportive but not at all present. I would so appreciate some honest comments and feedback from the forum to help me put this transition and my feelings of worth into perspective.