Wanting advice on how to deal with a scary experience

[Shymumma]

Yesterday while driving a guy cut me off and was yelling at me, he then followed my car for over half an hour (changed lanes behind me, followed when i turned off several times). I called a friend then the police who said for me to drive to the police station in the city. I was starting to get panicky and by the time i got to the police station i was crying. I parked out the front and he drove past. Police said someone would come out and to stay in my car. Waited a few minutes and still no police then saw same car in my rear view mirror - he’d gobe round the block!! He stopped next to my car for about 3 minutes and finally left, by that time i was having a full blown panic attack and still no police. Finally they turned up & i gave a statement.

my question is, how do i deal with this mentally? Do i try ont to think about it and keep busy or should i talk to my friends/family about it and maybe seek professional help. It keeps popping into my head and ive already cancelled going to a party because i didnt want to bring the party down with my story. Im also angry that this idiot has upset me so much

[Croix]

Dear Shymumma~

I'm very sorry to hear of your horrible experience, it sounds very frightening and the fact he would not just go -and the the police were slow - makes for a nightmare situation.

It really is over now, and the chances are you will never see that person or car again though of course that will not stop you worrying about it. I guess the important thing at the moment is not to try to bottle it all up and attempt to deal with it all by yourself.

If it was me I would tell my friends and family, and receive their support. I think being alone in this situation simply makes the fright and feelings of vulnerability worse. I've found comfort in numbers.

You are quite right to be angry, the man is an idiot and caused harm to a stranger, you, for no reason. Drugs or road rage immediately spring to mind, which in all probability means he has forgotten the details by now, maybe members the police station.

Of course it will keep popping in you head for a while, and that is most unpleasant. Hopefully in the next week or so it will tone down to manageable levels. If you find you are still pretty well consumed by the matter in three or four weeks if it was me I'd go see my doctor and get some counseling.

I'm no expert, that's just what I'd do. In the meantime family and friends are people to lean on during tough times.

Please let us know how you go

Croix

[demonblaster]

Hi and welcome to the forums Shymumma ☺

I'm sorry hearing you went through that it would have been very frightening and I commend how you handled it, well done ringing a friend and the police you did well on both accounts.

I suggest not to try blocking this because you need to be able to process and come to terms with what happened which would shake anyone so please try not to be too hard on yourself and being angry is I'd say a normal response but directing it at yourself would inflame how you feel and this wasn't your fault and you didnt deserve it at all. Poor form from that person.

I also suggest talking to family and friends about this and you might find it helpful to talk to a professional which can be arranged through your GP.

I am sorry for the stress you're under and please feel free at anytime to talk here and if you'd like to speak to someone in person the number here is 1300224636

Very best wished for you darl ☺🕊

[jollydolly]

What a moron - but you handled it really well! I've had this happen to me (nowhere near as long or serious as yours, but a few times for a few kms) and it makes scared, but really furious too, that someone would try to intimidate me. I'm not an expert, but I think sharing your story and getting it all out there, rather than feeling like you're keeping a secret, would be a better option. You could be casual about it, like "It might sound weird, but ever since this guy harassed me on the road, I've been a bit shaky" and then if that feels comfortable, tell more of the story and how you're feeling. Or if it's playing itself out a lot in your mind, try writing down how you're feeling, or talk to yourself (thank yourself for being so brave, or reassure yourself that you're safe and sound now). And if you do go and seek some support from a counselor, I'm sure it will have a positive outcome. Best wishes.

[Jacstar44]

Hi Shymumma,

Wow, that was a scary experience you had there. I am not surprised you are still feeling traumatized afterwards. I agree that you should definitely talk to someone about this, family and friends who can give you emotional support and professional help who are awesome at helping you move past this point and out of the fear/anger you are feeling with self help techniques.

Victims of Crime may be one organisation you might like to contact, as they will have information on who you can see and what support you can get after being treated this way.

I know exactly how you feel about feeling that this guy has taken away your power and made you feel so upset. A professional counselor will be able to help you take back your power and let that guys go.

I really hope you find peace and can move past this point. Good luck Shymumma, my thoughts are with you.