I got my first job about a month and a half ago and it makes me feel horrible. Talking over the PA, making small talk in the break room, conversing with customers, everything is making me nervous. Even worrying about whether I'm packing groceries too slow.
I'm 15 and I was diagnosed with social anxiety and depression last year. Things have been spiralling downhill ever since and since I got a job things have been even worse. All I do now is worry about my next shift, when I'm out with friends or family or if I'm alone in my room. It's all I think about now.
Before every shift I feel sick and I can't stop myself from remembering previous mistakes I've made and how my supervisors/co-workers hate me for it. I've considered resigning but I don't want to disappoint my family and I don't want to stop making money.
The only reason I haven't resigned is because of the income, I love going to events and festivals but asking my parents for money makes me feel guilty and I hate it. So without a job I won't be able to go out with friends or to events anymore. Without my own money I won't leave the house as much as I do which already isn't a whole lot.
Recently I've been thinking that if I quit it'll be harder for my to get a job in the future because of my anxiety and the employers looking into my records or whatever they do.
I don't know if the money is worth the anxiety, what should I do?
