Fear of Dying - Anxiety

TTorna
Community Member

Hi everyone,

I have general anxiety about a lot of things but it is manageable usually. I have relationship/social anxiety which has induced minor anxiety attacks like the occasional vomit.

However, I had an anxiety attack two days ago which was the most intense I've ever felt. It went for 12-18 hours in total. I was vomitting, shaking, unable to think about anything else but my fear, had a tight chest, etc. It is all to do with health. I had a scare a few months back about my eye, and potential cancer. Doctors convinced me I had it and then I spent the next 3 months waiting for the next appointment thinking every day I was dying etc, and then it turned out they made a mistake and I was perfectly healthy. Ever since then any symptom of my body feels extreme and I notice it like it is the only thing happening, and I google the symptoms (ive tried to stop this since) and find all these links to cancer, etc. I become overwhelmed with the idea that I am definitely dying and nobody will really care that I will be gone. It was so overwhelming, I tried meditation of all kinds, breathing exercises, and focusing on the present but nothing could help me escape those dark thoughts.

I went to a GP about my back. 1st doctor didn't even examine me just said it is muscle pain. 2nd doctor was great, did a full back examination, was 100 percent sure it was muscle related, but then also got me to do a chest x-ray just to calm my nerves and prescribed me a small amount of valium due to my anxiety attack. He has since rung me up and told me the xray showed nothing and that I am fine, and if the pain continues just see a psysiotherapist. But I still feel that feeling of not being able to be present and escape those thoughts of dying, even though everything that has been checked around these symptoms is checked. I am quite fearful of this anxiety attack happening again, because honestly I don't know how to escape it. I do have valium from the dr, but it didn't seem to do much for me.


1 Reply 1

Gambit87
Community Member

Hi TTorna,

Not very professional by the doctors! can certainly see why you are experiencing the anxiety.

While I dont experience the same things you do, I do often worry about my mortality especially having a heart attack (my dad had a heart attack fairly young - survived though!). I'm only 33 cholesterol is high and im on cholesterol meds (im pretty slim aswell) so im always thinking about it. When I eat spicy/high fat foods I get heart burn which causes a little tightness across my chest - so I automatically think I have heart attack symptoms, even though I know full well its just heart burn.

A few weeks ago I had a very mild curry, got heart burn and got the normal pains etc. I went to bed and woke up - my mind was calm but my body was freaking out (something i have never experienced before). To calm down I just looked around at the things I could see/touch/smell (grounding techniques) and listen to soft music. I try not to take medication because it makes me feel like have had a weekend bender the next day.

Have you considered talking to a psychologist? Talking through the thought process can really help your understanding.