Do I have social anxiety or general anxiety

[Morehope]

I've always had lots of close friends and never felt anxious in social settings. I always love being under the spotlight. However, 4 years ago since I have moved to another country on my own for studies, I have grown more and more introverted. I feel as if whenever I do small talk with someone I try too hard and end up saying the wrong things and just embarrass myself. It pains me to talk to someone new and regret it and try to get out of it. I think it makes it worse since I've found my partner in life in these 4 years and don't feel the need to talk to anyone else because I can talk to and hang out with my partner. I don't go out with the few friends I have in this new country and always make an excuse to not go out. For this reason I have absolutely no social life with my friends. I do not reply to any of my messages on my phone for at least a day just because I don't know what to say to someone I'm not in contact with on a daily basis. I am almost completely out of touch with my best friends back in my home country. I also worry about random things through out the day. What will happen when I have a baby. Will I be able to be financially stableto have a baby. I will think of this all day and will be unable to fall asleep at night. I am also worried when I'm in a car all the time that a car will hit us and I will die. My anxiety in cars has made me not get my drivers license as I'm sure I'll die once I get my licence because I will get anxious of other drivers and not be able to make the right turns because I blank out. On the days I don't have work I would rather not go out and worry about all that I need to get done but not actually do it and hence waste my free day stressing about something I haven't gotten done for months. I'm not sure if the anxiety is triggered or worsened by anything but I have had a few very traumatic events happen to me in the last 3-4 years that I still have nightmares and flash backs and sadness about. I also feel very below average. Seeing a movie or film with people working in an office upsets me as I feel ill never be able to achieve that. I feel like I am worthless to the society, do not have any creative talents to make up for my lack of critical thinking and intellect. I feel sad when I see my friends start a business and it looks good because I feel like I would never be able to recreate anything merely as nice. It's not jealousy, it's just sadness and feelings of uselessness. Do I need professional help?

[Guest_4643]

Hi, welcome.

We can't make diagnoseses here, we're not professionals. You would be best discussing this with a GP then a Psychologist, etc. Sorry to hear you're struggling though.

[Guest_1643]

hey morehope - another form of anxiety is PTSD which u may find helpful reading about

i hear that ur in a dark place... maybe there are helplines u could try to call just to get a bit more sense of what's going on

life line is a great place to start

i respct and undrestand that ur feelings of hopelessnss feel very real and are all-consuming. i feel like that too. sometimes eveen with these horrible feelings, we can try and distract ourselves for on moree minute or hour or even day just to get through. the feelings will still be there, but we get a small break, which offers us some perspctive.

[Guest_4643]

Hi Morehope. I'm sorry, I must have misread your thread due to the title, I do apologise. I hope I didn't upset you, you are welcome here, everyone is. It was my mistake.

It sounds like general anxiety with the stuff you bought up such as driving etc.

[Guest_1643]

Hi tayla, hopee u don't mind me getting involvd, i understand it's hard when we talk in general here about diagnoses but i think it's okay within limits if we do share our expreienc with diagnoses and our understanding of diagnoses in general. if we're sharing our experience, that's ok. Eg I have this diagnoses, or this experience in being diagnosed, I think that's okay. I know it's hard and sometimes ppl are too forceful saying like "You have this daignosis" but bar that, if we just chat a little about what we feel, what comes up for us when we read a post, and our own experiences, it should be ok. We're all trying our best and ur helping others a lot here. Thanks to everyone on these threads for being so awesome, urself included!

Hope ur okay morehope 🙂

[Guest_4643]

I'm sorry I made a mistake Sleepy, I'm already upset about it. I see your point though I guess. I wrote that in the other thread too. I just misread and got confused by the title. I do apologise sincerely.

[Guest_1643]

hi tayla

sorry if that came out wrong

i was just saying that talk of diagnoses is triggering for many here, but that doesn't mean it's totally off limits, and hoping we as a forum can continue to be open and redefine what a safe and helpful way there is to talk about diagnoses, without triggering ppl, but still allowing the convo to continue. It is my hope that there are ways to do this. Cheers.

[Guest_4643]

Sorry Sleepy and Morehope.

[Guest_1643]

absolutely nothing to apologise for... disagreeing and learning and asking questions are all totally okay here.

[Here2Talk]

Hi Morehope,

The main feature of generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) is persistent worry that is severe and frequent enough to disrupt your life, and generalized, meaning it can be about anything - fears of dying, worry about financial things, and random things fit this. Social anxiety is specifically a fear of social interactions - you mention being worried about saying the wrong thing, and don't know what to text back to people for a whole day. This also sounds like social anxiety. BeyondBlue has information and checklists to get you started examining this, for both GAD and social anxiety (sometimes referred to as social phobia). Do check out the link below for both of these if you think you would like to:

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety/types-of-anxiety/gad

You have also been through a lot - moving to another country and the traumas you alluded to: what country did you move from, and I assume it is Australia you moved to?

The above comments are right, it would be best to see your GP, who may recommend medication and therapy (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) with a psychologist. The psychologist will be able to assist you with talk therapy and perhaps other things like progressive muscle relaxation, mindfulness/meditation etc.

You can have two disorders at the same time. GAD and Social Anxiety Disorder have been often found to occur together.

Again like someone else mentioned, this forum is not for diagnosis - that's for a Clinical Psychologist or Psychiatrist to do - if they do. But I think it's worthwhile to at least know about them, and the Beyond Blue website that this forum is a part of has information on it, so why not.

I speak as someone in my 30s now, who has grappled with generalized and social anxiety for over two decades now, so I am an expert, and happy if you want to keep chatting here, talk about my experiences of what works for these kinds of anxiety, or if you want to ask any questions.

Warm Regards.