Crying again!

[ci]

I'm so tiered had 2 terrible days anxiety so high causing me to be physically sick. Woke up today a little better really keen to achieve something I'm so behind with work and the house stuff! 

Everything seemed to go wrong though and here I am balling my eyes out again because my head has just run away with itself thoughts are crazy the pressure of day to day stuff is to much. Everyday this happens I  fall more and more behind then the pressure of everything seems overwhelming  and makes it worse it's this horrible cycle I  can't get off!

How do you make this end I  feel so weak but honestly it's hell in my head! 

Sorry for the rant need to get it out

[Mummybee]

Hi Ci,

sounds like today is a bad day for you. I have these too sometimes.

if you can, try making a list of the most pressing things that you have to get done in order of their importance. Sit down with a coffee or cup of tea and do it at your own pace.

then take a deep breath, keep taking them and do number one on your list. When it's done, go and cross it off and see if you feel motivation to do number two. Often a list helps me move through all the tasks that seem too overwhelming. If that doesn't work then I have nothing but empathy for you 

good luck. Go get stuff done!

mummybee 

[ci]

Thank-you mummybee 

Funny you say that I big on lists pat down yesterday wrote it out to organize myself so today I could get things done.   I also find list helps unscramble my brain helps me focus I  just crying looking at the list I've tried twice to leave the house get things done down the street but have had to turn and come home I'm  not ok to be in public. I work from home but can't get any of that done either I've found myself in a bit of a mess not sure what or how to do anything. Something is broken this week it's scaring me not sure what to do. I know will get better but oh my gosh this is so hard! Just want it to stop 

[Guest_5218]

Hello Ci.  So sorry to hear your having such a bad few days.  I do understand how you feel.  I too get that way sometimes where everything just seems way too hard, and you lapse into tears at just about everything.  I too stay out of the public eye during those times.  You're right, it is a very scary thing to go through, because all you really want is for it all to stop!

Please know that you are not alone in this. So many others care and support you.  You just have to keep telling yourself that tomorrow will be better. And then you will be able to start ticking off those things on your list.  A sense of achievement is healing in itself, no matter how big or small.

Hugs { ci } and understanding from me.

Sherie xx

[Guest_1055]

I'm sorry Ci

It's awful when we want to clean the house, or other house stuff, but we are simply just to tired or overwhelmed to do it. And crying, well for me that just makes me more tired. In fact the dishes are still waiting to be washed in my kitchen sink. So take heart, don't be too hard on yourself.

One thing that has helped me, is..... I just wash my face, because I have been crying, like you.  Make sure I always make the bed every morning, which is a real challenge for me when everything feels overwhelming.

Then before I go to bed, I walk around the house, and pick up five items, and put them away, only five.  These items are things that sort of niggle at you. For instance, I finally threw out some dead plant, that had been starting at me for months. Then I would go into the bathroom, pick up anything that was left on the floor, like wet towels and dirty socks. Then clear away and wipe down the basin area.

This hopefully leaves it a bit more clean and organised, for when you wake up the next day. And your head feels a little more clearer and organised as well to face the day. Well that is the outcome of this cleaning/organising routine that has worked for me.

Not sure if anything of what I have said helps, but if it hasn't, please know you are not alone in this overwhelming feeling, or  the fact that you simply burst into tears. No...... you are definitely not alone here.

With many hugs to you

Shelley anne xxx

[ci]

Thankyou shelley anne and Sherie  it is nice to know your not alone although i wouldn't wish this on anyone to go through. 

Shelley anne i to find washing my face helps start fresh or i tend to go one bigger and get in the shower feel like im washing everything away. 

Today is a little better ive so far been achieving things for the first time this week! need to get the usual mum stuff done around the house so its not frustrating me but at the same time work piles up on my desk im taking a well deserved break to right this reply give myself some time out and chance to breath im determined to make it through the day!

last night was bad couldn't do dinner made the kids huge salad and my husband went to grab the kids piece of fish and some chips to go with it. does anyone else have this problem feel like such a failure of a mum when this happens and it happens way to often lately.

hate not being the mum i used to be the mum i should be the one my kids deserve!

hope you all having a good day xx

[Guest_1055]

Afternoon cinema

 Hey ci

It's OK!  and yeah I know we do feel like we are letting them down. But the salad you made sounds pretty cool. You know I have tried preparing extra dinners, and then freezing them, that seems to work.

Hugs to you

Shelley

[Guest_5218]

Hello again Ci.  You're right, it is reassuring to know that you arent the only one going through this.  And that others do understand and care.  I'm glad that you feel that too.   I hope that it will provide you with the strength to hang in there until you once again come out the other side a stronger and more resilient person and Mum.

At least you are feeling a little better today and have been able to start accomplishing a few things.  Thats fabulous, well done.  Keep ticking things off and you will get where you want to be in no time.  Try not to put undue pressure on yourself.......  It sounds like you are a great Mum.  Nothing better than a good healthy salad.  And with the addition of fish and chips, you cant go too far wrong there.  

Regarding the work which you have kind of put on the back burner - are you facing any deadlines there?  You didnt say what type of work you did from home.  But if you dont have any hard and fast deadlines, perhaps you could just put it all aside for a week or so?  And just try not to even think about it. That will enable you to get yourself sorted out on the home and family front first, and that sounds like it is your greatest concern.  You dont need to be battling two fronts just now.  So just concentrate on the one.

Then when you are back in a better place, you can tackle your work again, with renewed vigour.  It could surprise you just how quickly you are able to get back to that point.  

Are you able to do any exercise at all?  Perhaps obtain some tapes or DVD's for yoga or pilates. Something not necessarily strenuous, but that can get you moving and concentrating on something other than all your existing pressures?  You dont have to leave home to do that, so that could be worthwhile looking at.  In the meantime, keep up the relaxing breathing.  

Thinking of you Ci, and hope each day brings further improvement and joy. Give those kids and husband of yours a big hug.

Sherie  xx