Covid 19 Anxiety - returning out of isolation

[JazzyMum]

I'm a teacher and have immuno compromised family members I am sole carer for. I have been back at work for a little while but I cannot resolve the issue of different rules in school vs social distancing in the outside world. I have had a couple of massive panic/ anxiety attacks in the past two days.

I walk around with 1700 others all day in a world where social distancing is talked about but impossible to maintain. I don't believe children (esp 18 year olds) are affected as differently to adults. I'm the teacher so I can control this to some extent but how can my 14 year old, who returned to school today do this? - he cannot control others - he's a teenager - they cannot be expected to socially distance. How can I let my child back into the system I am rendered unable to cope with?

I have spoken to a few people who try to tell me how lucky we are and how its theoretically safe but my brain has put up walls that I am petrified to knock down.

My GP says its all a myth - so I can't exactly ask for help there.

After isolating for two months I am finding the lack of control of environment incredibly difficult to deal with. I'm walking daily but as soon as I try to chill a bit my head floods with arguments about the valid and non valid aspects of what I'm experiencing.

I know a lot of school children are experiencing the same anxiety that they've never had before - any advice on how to move forward would be welcomed. Big socially distant hugs to anyone experiencing the same - I'm sure we can get through this but I'm just not sure how.

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi JazzyMum,

Welcome to the forums and a big socially distant hug to you too (much needed!). Thank you for your post and for sharing how things have been going.

I can imagine the anxiety of being a teacher in school, but on top of that how hard it must be having immuno-compromised family members as well.

It also sounds like while people may have good intentions, the whole 'be lucky' and 'it's a myth' doesn't sound very helpful either! Reading this, it actually seems a little dismissive. Your anxiety and concerns are totally valid and need to be recognised as such.

What people know for sure is that for some reason, young people aren't as affected by COVID-19 as adults. The research on why this is, isn't clear. We also know for sure that the way we have managed COVID-19 has in fact stopped the spread, so there are significantly less cases than what could have been. It's not a 'myth' but it's just that the benefits of opening schools and the risks that come with that outweighs keeping schools completely closed until there are potentially no active cases in Australia at all.

With that said though, there is no doubt in my mind that nothing is 'non-valid' here. Of course you would be anxious, of course there would be fears. That is completely normal and understandable - you are absolutely not alone in what you are experiencing.

I'm reading back through this post now and I don't think it's very reassuring - but I think it would be an injustice to you to say things like 'it's fine' or 'don't worry'. You are doing the absolute best you can in a very unique and unknown situation and it's okay to feel the way you feel. You will get through this though and another socially distanced hug to you.

rt

[JazzyMum]

Thank you for your words - you have made me feel happier about where I am and that feels a bit better. I spose I just have to start choosing to get back out there and stop being scared - I don't know how but I'll try getting some help.

[Mara56]

Hi JazzyMum,

I second everything romantic_thi3f said. You are justified to feel anxious and concerned. I also agree with romantic_thi3f regarding your Dr sounding dismissive. I had a totally different response from my Dr. She was very reassuring in so much as while Australia has hard borders with each State and also the rest of the world, she felt the risk was significantly lower here. Mind despite her reassurance I still have anxiety about stepping out into the world at the moment. This phase feels scarier to me than when we had more cases in Australia.

I can also relate to you in regard to concerns about social distancing with the school environment. My son is a teacher. He has chronic asthma and I have been very concerned for his welfare since the return to classrooms.

I have to believe that it is going to be a step at time. And it will take a while before we can trust that it is safe. That said though, if the numbers continue to reduce I have to believe all will be ok.

In the mean time stay safe.

Sending a socially distanced hug to you.

Mara

[JazzyMum]

Thanks Mara - I too have chronic asthma and rheumatoid arthritis but I'm not concerned for myself so much - just scared. I think my conviction to quarantine - isolate - protect my family was so strong that - yes - coming out the other side with the possible hiding asymptomatic spreaders does my head in whilst at school.

I think, somehow, I have to start looking at the facts through the eyes of a very lucky survivor who chooses life and is happy to live it in a God given country. My rational thought processes continue to lead me into fearful outcomes which, I know, is irrational! I have to somehow move past the fear. I've made promises to call and ask for help tomorrow. Can't see how someone can help me but I trust that if I hang on there will be someone out there who will help me past this - told kids to this so many times and now faced with it I'm battling it - but I will make the phone call - in fact I will make the phone call until I find someone I can talk to - given the Dr I see says covid19 is a myth I need to reach out to someone else.

Mara, I hope that you realise, as I have done, that you're not alone. And your response is entirely reasonable but we can't stay locked up forever and run away completely (wish I could right now but I'm fighting it). One day at a time and keep believing in yourself and your son. Thank you for reaching out to me - I am more appreciative than you will ever know.

[Mara56]

Hi JazzyMum,

I commend you for deciding to call and ask for help. Hopefully they person you connect to can reassure you.

I agree with you we cannot stay looked up forever. My Dr's reassurance have helped me to a degree, and my rational brain knows that while no one is travelling here from overseas and we have had borders between our States, the risk is minimal especially compered to overseas.

My anxiety is linked to the fact that my youngest son died as the result of an asthma attack. When you lose a child it's normal to have heightened concern for your remaining children. At least that is what I've been told. Given my other son is also asthmatic....... well you can see why my anxiety has risen during this pandemic.

That said, the cases in our area are minimal. I have to believe that all will be ok. The whole world is working on a vaccination. I have to believe that a vaccination will be found.

As you say, one step at a time. We will get through this.

Take care

Mara