anxious about war

[Bookgirl]

War is one of my triggers and all this Ukraine is stuff is sending me spiralling. I HATE IT. I wish the world could just be peaceful. After the last two years of covid and now this, i just can't take it. Feel so overwhelmed at the moment. Feel sick all the time. Worried about my son's future. I don't understand why this is going on now when you would think the human race would be over this crap by now. Covid seemed to bring people together and now its just fallen apart. I just want my son to grow up in peace.

[Bookgirl]

Thanks. I managed not to fall completely apart and stay at work and come into work today. Still feel like crap (bad stomach and tingling in my hands and arms) and that the world is ending but i managed it. I feel exhausted from it all. Just wish it was all over if we are going to have a war and if we all die then at least i will be at peace.

[Banksy92]

Hi Bookgirl, sorry to hear you're feeling the weight of the world right now. It truly can be a horrible thought and I empathies deeply with you. The media is such an important tool but I do believe it can be terribly harmful - particularly to people who are more susceptible to worry.

May I suggest a media detox? Just to distance yourself from these type of triggers? I think deleting news apps, avoiding the news channels on TV and even steering clear of social media for a few weeks might be really helpful to reduce your worry and help give you space to regulate your nervous system. Actively giving ourselves permission to look away and filling that space with self-care and things you enjoy is really helpful.

I have had to do this in the past when I was very upset about politics going on in the news, it helped a lot.

Let us know how you're feeling.

[missep123]

Hi Bookgirl,

I can really see how much you have been trying to cope and I'm really proud of you for that and you should be proud of yourself. It can be so hard to deal with our thoughts they can really feel like a monkey hanging of our shoulders.

I really like @banksy92's idea above regarding a media detox. I have had to do that when the case numbers in Sydney were going up, every 11am I would always find myself searching online. I think it's really important to remove triggers because what we don't realise sometimes is that:

Trigger = thoughts (negative automatic thoughts) + behaviour (not feeling well, falling into a cycle of researching)

We are definitely here for you during this journey!

[Russian_Red_Foxx]

Hi Bookgirl,

I'm sorry to hear that. Just know that you are not alone and I, along with loads of other people, have been feeling the same way. I would suggest talking to lifeline, they are really good at listening to what you have to say and being non-judgemental.

[Bookgirl]

I have these points where i am ok and then everything seems hopeless. I hate feeling helpless and i don't understand why this is happening and why anyone would want this to happen. War is stupid and nobody wins. People suffer and for what? So you can say you are right or get what you want. Just feel exhausted all the time and sick to my stomach about the stupidity of it all.

[Bookgirl]

Saw the news today and came home from work in a panic and stayed in bed all day. I hate, hate, hate this world right now.

[Learn to Fly]

Hi Bookgirl,

I couldn't have agreed more with all the friends here who had recommended you sustaining from media coverage for some time.

How do you familiarise yourself with the news? By watching TV, reading feeds on various apps, listening to the radio? How do you find not following the news? Easy or difficult to ignore the TV or whatever other device you are using? How does the news abstinence make you feel? Does this feeling encourage you to continue to ignore the news or prompts you to watch them?

Sorry, I feel I might have bombarded you with my questions. I don't mean to be disrespectful of your privacy but maybe shedding some light here would help us to help you? Please do not feel obligated to answer any of my questions. No pressure at all.

Sending loads of positive vibes your way. You are not alone.

[Bookgirl]

Hi, i have taken news off newsfeeds from everywhere on my devices. I don't look much but when i do its abc news. I don't read the paper or anything. But when i don't look i feel anxious anyway about what is/isn't happening and how i need to know what is going on in order to protect myself i guess. To prepare for whatever is going to happen even though there is absolutely nothing at all i can do. I made the mistake of looking at work today and it just sent me into a panic attack completely. My husband tells me not to look either but how does that help in the long run? I don't know may be i will be happy until the end. I don't know. I am just so unhappy at the moment.

[Learn to Fly]

Hi Bookgirl,

Thank you for such a prompt response. I really appreciate you answering my questions and sharing some more information with us. Thank you.

"Easier said than done" - I imagine this might be going through your mind after hearing from me and others "how about not watching the news", am I right here?

It seems like this is catch-22. You familiarise yourself with the news to know what might be coming and/or what to expect next. This puts you in anxiety mode and worrying about the future for your son and your family. You know there is nothing you can do about it all, but you struggle to refrain from further watching the news in case you miss on something and you won't be prepared and protected. Did I get that right? No wonder this spiralling thinking sends you off to the high anxiety mode. You would have to be made out of steel to be able to sustain such weight on your shoulders. There is nothing wrong with you wanting to do everything in your power to protect your son and wanting for him to have a better world to live in. We all want this as we think that generations would've learnt as it seems the human race has done it all.

Have you ever had a chance to talk to a specialist or even your GP? I think you are past the point of "just stop watching the news" and it wouldn't hurt to try a bit more in-depth approach involving providing you with help. How would you feel about it?

[Bookgirl]

Hi, i do have a psych and take medication but this is next level for me. How does everyone else cope when it seems so bleak? my husband says he can't control it so he just lives day to day which i try to do but its so hard.