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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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cateanne Struggling.
  • replies: 3

Hi. I'm a 20yo turning 21 in a few months. I'd like to pretend that my life has gone the way I thought it was when I was younger, that id be happy and have friends and just enjoy living. But I don't. I'm alone and I'm scared. I haven't had any friend... View more

Hi. I'm a 20yo turning 21 in a few months. I'd like to pretend that my life has gone the way I thought it was when I was younger, that id be happy and have friends and just enjoy living. But I don't. I'm alone and I'm scared. I haven't had any friends since I was 10 years old, and I guess that's partly my fault. I had a best friend since I was 5, who suddenly was invited to sit with the popular girls so she stopped speaking to me completely, it made me feel like I wasn't good enough. That one single event shaped the rest of my life and got me here. I don't know what to do anymore. I want friends, I want someone to tell me I don't deserve to stop existing and support me. I want to support other people. I spend my days watching t.v shows filled with girls with loads of friends and it just hurts. I don't want to struggle on my own anymore and I don't know what to do...

Er12397 Anxiety help? Does it get better?
  • replies: 4

I've been living with anxiety and panic attacks for the past 3 years, but over the past 12 months I've been experiencing constant dizzy spells (I've been to a doctor and nothing is wrong with my body, so it has to be my anxiety) I can't go anywhere o... View more

I've been living with anxiety and panic attacks for the past 3 years, but over the past 12 months I've been experiencing constant dizzy spells (I've been to a doctor and nothing is wrong with my body, so it has to be my anxiety) I can't go anywhere or be alone with out the room spinning, the fear of fainting or having a bad panic attack. I'm terrified of crowds, tight places, being off the ground floor, being in a room with no windows, and being away from the comfort of my bedroom, and It's starting to ruin my life! I'm losing connection with friends, family and I'm not going to classes and I can't drive anywhere by myself because I'm terrified of what may happen. I've even ended up in an ambulance because of my dizziness, which lead to hyperventilating (my anxiety convinced me that I was dying). I'm seeing a psychologist, practice mindfulness, push myself to leave the house, and use things such as rescue remedy, but I'm running out of ideas because I just feel like I'm running around in a circle! Has anyone else experienced this? How did you over come it? Will this get any better? Please help. I don't want this to destroy any more of my life.

Paige02 Intense fear of men
  • replies: 4

I have a very weird intense fear of men and I actually don't know what to do with myself! Apparently I have been very shy around guys ever since I was little, which makes no sense as I did not go through any traumatic experience that I am aware of th... View more

I have a very weird intense fear of men and I actually don't know what to do with myself! Apparently I have been very shy around guys ever since I was little, which makes no sense as I did not go through any traumatic experience that I am aware of that would cause this fear and over the years shyness turned into plain fear. I have a healthy relationship with my dad and my younger brother and although I am awkward around my uncles I am still able to have conversations with them and not feel horrible, however the closer they are to my age the bigger my fear becomes. As a way to get over this fear I applied for a job at a factory as a receptionist and got it, I work around mostly men that are much older than me and I was painfully shy at first but I have learnt to be a little more confident around them however there is one guy there that I actually can not talk to at all and he is the youngest of the guys I think he's around 25 and I'm 18 the rest are 40 plus and married. I recently tried dating apps because my fear prevents me from meeting new people, I have also never had a good guy friend ever in my life! Anyway the dating app nearly made me throw up I was so nervous talking to the guys even online my stomach was in knots I felt like I was going to pass out, I am not confident in myself at all I hate the way I look and I don't really like myself as a person and I think that has a lot to do with it, I was teased a fair bit by guys in primary school and high school but it was nothing to out of hand, but my confidence plummeted dramatically around the age of 15 ish. my family has a long line of anxiety and depression but nothing like this, it really impacts my day to day life and I am about to start uni, I really think I'm going to screw it up bcause of this irrational fear and I really am terrified that I won't make any friends at all. On the surface I seem to be fairly easy going and fun loving so people think I exaggerate when I say that I am scared of boys, they think I'm just being dramatic but it's true and I hate myself for it because it makes no sense! Please does anyone have any advice? I feel like I am stuck in this mess of fear and anxiety and it's really impacting my happiness thanks heaps x

Gcgirl Dealing with it all
  • replies: 3

Hi all im Bree 22 I'm reaching out as I need to vent and release what has been kept inside it seems nobody else cares or understands my cancer passed away in 2012 with cancer it was horrible I have nightmares of the last few times I seen her at her w... View more

Hi all im Bree 22 I'm reaching out as I need to vent and release what has been kept inside it seems nobody else cares or understands my cancer passed away in 2012 with cancer it was horrible I have nightmares of the last few times I seen her at her wake I spoke to this man Ryan who I had known most of my life but not we'll he was my cousins best friend and he and his farther were always at our family get togethers anyway the next day we started dating. We have now been together just over 3 years things were okay, back in November my bf was diagnosed with cancer was to be a huge surgery and long radiation treatment me and his farther had planned who sees him what day in hospital so everyday he would have someone there sadly his farther passed away December as u can imagine it was gut wrenching . My parents were also kinda stressed and took it out on me but anyway we were broke and had to organise a funeral I had to do it my bf has always been abit lazy and often won't answer calls etc so I arranged the funeral and the money to pay for it I managed to see my bf 6 days out of 7 he was in hospital and I went to 32 out of 33 radiation treatments with him it was hard being poor and stressed cz of all that had and was happening but the doctors say he's okay at the moment okay fast forward my bf received a lot of money from his late farthers super and since then he has been so mean saying I only stayed with him for money I didn't even kno about super and I never once thort oh he's gunnr get a lot of money point is I'm still poor and he's not but he will be soon but he says I'm a bum and don't contribute enough he also calls me fat and ugly that really hurts my feelings I have very low self esteem I use to get bullied at school I feel I'm not good enough for him all I do is annoy him I love him so much and he was so loving and caring before I know he must be stressed but sometimes when he throws stuff in my face I think we'll I'm the only person who has been there for u through everything and sometimes I wonder would he do the same for me thanks for reading x

May22 Struggling with uni, work and pressure
  • replies: 3

I'm currently at uni and recently I've been feeling really hopeless. I work a lot and have class 5 days and the pressure of that and study and trying to worry about social expectations is weighing me down. I get really lonely a lot but I have quite a... View more

I'm currently at uni and recently I've been feeling really hopeless. I work a lot and have class 5 days and the pressure of that and study and trying to worry about social expectations is weighing me down. I get really lonely a lot but I have quite a few 'friends'. Everything is just getting a bit much lately and I have a friend I can talk to but I'm weighing them down and I can't do that. It's not fair to them. i don't know what to do... I want to help myself without getting anyone else involved but I'm struggling. m

ROOH Boyfriend can't function
  • replies: 5

Hi everyone,My boyfriend started full time work this year and his anxiety has flared up. He had to go on antidepressants. He was on anti depressants and another medication at first and after this built up in his system he managed to go to work 4 days... View more

Hi everyone,My boyfriend started full time work this year and his anxiety has flared up. He had to go on antidepressants. He was on anti depressants and another medication at first and after this built up in his system he managed to go to work 4 days a week but sometimes had to leave due to panic attacks. His psychiatrist has now put him on a less 'heavy' drug but now he hardly gets to work. It's extremely difficult for me because I have to look after him in the mornings like he is my own son. Is there hope that the new medication will start working with the antidepressants? Also the beta blockers seem to only take affect for 2 hours, has anyone else had this experience? Does anyone have a partner who was not able to work but after months the medication started helping? He is also doing systematic desensitisation to help his fear of leaving for work in the morning. He was also diagnosed with aspergers a few years ago. It doesn't help that his parents said things like "what if you can't handle the job" etc when we tried to move out together. That's when it went downhill. Any info or advice would be appreciated.Thanks

teacup situational depression/anxiety
  • replies: 5

I am a recent graduate from university and I cannot seem to find a job, initially I was really proactive about it, I volunteered my time in a relevant area, I took on a course at TAFE to try and get more practical skills, however I keep getting turne... View more

I am a recent graduate from university and I cannot seem to find a job, initially I was really proactive about it, I volunteered my time in a relevant area, I took on a course at TAFE to try and get more practical skills, however I keep getting turned down again and again and I put so much effort into my applications, I prepare for days before an interview (learning about the organisation, going over potential questions), and I feel like an utter failure. I know that telling people you're suffering from anxiety/depression from not having a job sounds silly, but I just feel as if the regularity from my life is gone, and I am embarrassed about not having a job, I hate the dreaded question "so where do you work/what are you doing with your self?" because I feel like an utter leach on society. I hate it when people complain about their jobs because its the one thing I so desperately want. I often wake up in the night with night terrors and I am moody at my housemates all the time, I try to get out of the house and do things, but I cant afford it most of the time, I try and go to social gatherings and find myself not wanting to be there. I just don't know, I feel like a giant blob of waste. I use to so energetic and outgoing and that person people actually admired for being so 'on top' of everything.

warri0r /Sigh
  • replies: 3

Hi, I'm a newbie here, but most definitely not new to the perils of depression, OCD and social anxiety. I've had depression for many years, probably since year 7 (so 2005), OCD since (2008-09) and social anxiety for the past 3 years (so 2012). It's b... View more

Hi, I'm a newbie here, but most definitely not new to the perils of depression, OCD and social anxiety. I've had depression for many years, probably since year 7 (so 2005), OCD since (2008-09) and social anxiety for the past 3 years (so 2012). It's been manageable (my OCD) and I've never missed a day of school, or work because of it. But only recently, has it begun to cause such issues. This year alone, I've probably had 10 days off because of my OCD/depression, two of which were breakdowns to the point where leaving the house caused me a lot of pain, tears and screaming. There have been times where my OCD (My OCD is checking locks, fridges, doors, electrical sockets, taps, etc) has caused me to just cry and not be able to leave because of the stress. I avoid a lot of things in regards to it. For instance; not using the heater in the morning, avoiding using taps if possible, not wanting to cook breakfast - opening the fridge, using an electrical socket, using the stove, etc. But it's only come to such difficulty this year. In the past few it's been manageable, along with my Social Anxiety mostly because of cigarettes, alcohol and pure avoidance. I was officially diagnosed at the end of May, but I've only gone to see a psychologist booked in for Saturday. I have a partner, who does his best to 'understand' and 'help', but it's very unhelpful when you tell someone what's wrong, and they go 'dunno' or 'i don't know', or they get angry at you because you're upset and you genuinely do not know what's wrong. He hasn't experienced any of the above, so he has no real concept, so I don't blame him for not knowing. He does get upset when he can't fix it, but getting angry at me really doesn't help anything. His friends all know about my SA, and that I need to be comfortable with them before meeting them, yet none seem to really want to put in the effort, and he really doesn't try and support me in that decision, or even explaining anything to them. It hurts that he doesn't really care, and that he just lets them be arrogant and rude to me, while expecting me to deal with that on top of everything else. I need help in how to a) help myself with all that's going on, b) give my partner some tips on how to help me without resorting to medication, alcohol and cigarettes. Thank you in advance - and apologies if I managed to bore you

Kiseki How do you deal with tough times?
  • replies: 4

About two weeks ago, my mum broke her ankle when she was lifting my brother, who can't walk, into bed. She slipped and broke her ankle. She and my brother were taken to hospital, but my brother was discharged about 5 hours later. My mum needed to hav... View more

About two weeks ago, my mum broke her ankle when she was lifting my brother, who can't walk, into bed. She slipped and broke her ankle. She and my brother were taken to hospital, but my brother was discharged about 5 hours later. My mum needed to have surgery on her ankle and she only got out of hospital last Thursday. Since then, she's been confined to a wheelchair and I've had to help out with a lot of things that she would normally do.That's not what bothers me, though. Since about 10 days ago, I haven't had a chance to release everything that's built up inside me, and I know it's hurting me. It doesn't help that my mum's gotten upset with me a few times when I was pushing her wheelchair, because I was going 'too fast'. My brother is in a wheelchair, and I'm used to that, since I've grown up with it. My mum has never been in a wheelchair before and just seeing her like this demoralises me. She provides the stability needed to keep us all together. Whenever mum gets upset at me, it triggers a huge wave of negative thoughts. Why am I so stupid, so pathetic, so weak? Why can't I do anything right? No one else would make such a stupid mistake. It's gotten quite bad, too, to the point where I've wondered what would happen if I were to just disappear or leave. Would they miss me? The thing is, I don't want to talk to my mum about this, because I don't want her to feel upset or sad that this has happened. I don't want her to think that this is her fault, because it's not. I also don't want to burden anyone else with these problems, not when they could be helping someone who needs help much more than I do.I have low self-esteem and self-confidence, and I've never been one to place much faith in myself. I know that there's a whole lot of negativity that I need to let out, but I don't want to cry. I don't want to be weak. I want to be strong, because I have to look after those around me. Crying also makes me feel bad, as well, so I don't really know what to do. Maybe I'm scared of admitting to being weak, or maybe I'm just stubborn. I don't know. How can you feel better without having to feel pathetic first? beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Mate_23 Success
  • replies: 4

Hi everyone. I just thought I'd share a story of success in my battle with anxiety to hopefully provide some encouragement. I have some type of General Anxiety Disorder (I've never been professionally assessed to be honest) - I can't really say its a... View more

Hi everyone. I just thought I'd share a story of success in my battle with anxiety to hopefully provide some encouragement. I have some type of General Anxiety Disorder (I've never been professionally assessed to be honest) - I can't really say its as bad as some of the things I've read here but it has had a major control on my life for the last 10-12 years. My anxiety is generally caused/coupled with intrusive thoughts and negative thinking. It has caused me to become quite anti social and miss out on a few opportunities to live a more fulfilling life. Anyhow, this year I decided that I've had enough and have been learning more about anxiety and trying to overcome it. Finally last night for the first time in my life I was able to go out with some friends for a night out on the town without being too scared and just having some fun. When I was invited, part of me really didn't want to go because I was scared I would get panic attacks and what not. So I said to myself that anywhere I go, I'll always get anxious anyway and just accepted it. I pushed myself and went along. I had a great time. Sure there were some moments when started to feel anxious but I just let it be.(I'm currently reading a book on Acceptance and Commitment therapy and it seems to help). I really think the way to overcome it is just to out yourself out of your comfort zone. Has taken me to the age of 24 to actually go to a club(not saying this is the epitome of fun or anything, but it was an experience I thought I'd never have). I think you just need to move slowly and get out there and know that in the end, it's just the mind playing tricks and everything will be OK. I know i still have a long way to go, but i just wanted to share this. Hopefully it helps you.

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