Depression

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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 1

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

All discussions

SMaria How can I do this.
  • replies: 19

Lately , l have been feeling like I'm lost and I cry at the smallest things. I am easily frustrated and this has caused me to lose one of my good friends. I don't even know how to talk to people anymore, I just feel lost and no one can help me sort t... View more

Lately , l have been feeling like I'm lost and I cry at the smallest things. I am easily frustrated and this has caused me to lose one of my good friends. I don't even know how to talk to people anymore, I just feel lost and no one can help me sort this out. I don't feel like I belong anywhere and I feel unwanted most of the time and when I try talking to people I just don't feel like they want to listen and I think that ok the other end they are judging me for how I am feeling. All I want is for my friends to care about who I am and I don't want to appear to them as a sad person who in the me will have no friends i don't know what to do i just need help

just_a_girl The root of my problem
  • replies: 9

I have recently been diagnosed with depression. I think that deep down I always knew that, but hearing someone else say it really shook me. It was a difficult journey to announce that I had a problem, to be precise it took me four years. No one aroun... View more

I have recently been diagnosed with depression. I think that deep down I always knew that, but hearing someone else say it really shook me. It was a difficult journey to announce that I had a problem, to be precise it took me four years. No one around me knew that there was this inner turmoil going on within me. Neither my friends nor my family. My mother was shocked and so saddened, when my school counselor told her I had a problem, she was visibly unnerved by the unexpected events. She held me in her arms and asked me why I felt this way. I didn't know how to answer her because I wasn't even sure of the root of my problem myself. We cried and I took a couple of days off school so that we could go see our GP. He recommended we go see a psychiatrist and he gave us all the relevant information that we needed. I had to wait a month before I got to see him. Our first session was of me practically telling him all the things I have been going through. Generally the things that I have been unable to say out loud to people before. That first session left me in tears due to confronting my suicide attempts, feeling of worthlessness and incompetence, and the black pitch of darkness that was loneliness. We have yet come to a conclusion as to why I am like this, but I am afraid that I have come to a deduction myself. And what I think is the root of my depression is not something I am happy to admit. The reason for my depression is my mother. When she held me in her arms and ask me why I am feeling depressed, she asked me whether it was due to her. At that time she was already sobbing. So I took her into my own arms and told her that it wasn’t. I think that the reason I didn’t say anything at the time was because she was so anguished already, I didn’t want to upset her anymore. My mother can be a rather terrifying person. When she is angry, for some reason I am so scared for my life. She has never been violent to me, but for some reason when she is angry I am so scared. The basic relationship of a mother and daughter should not be like this, yet this is how it is for me. Our relationship dynamic consists of her being angry and me being submissive and cowering away in silence until she has calmed down enough so that I can apologise to her without angering her further. Don’t think that she is a bad person. She is a good mother and when she is not angry she is a great friend. A lovely woman who is tough, strong, funny, sweet, beautiful and capable. But then why am I so terrified of her? Depressed and Disheartened

Gingerninja That uncontrolled crazy feeling
  • replies: 15

Hi People out there in cyberspace,I'm hoping that sharing this with you will help me come to terms with my psychological problems. It's hard to talk to people in person about the craziness in your head. The thing that sucks the most is I KNOW that I ... View more

Hi People out there in cyberspace,I'm hoping that sharing this with you will help me come to terms with my psychological problems. It's hard to talk to people in person about the craziness in your head. The thing that sucks the most is I KNOW that I have nothing to be depressed /anxious about. You know, the standard first world problems type of disorder: I have a house, partner, am an engineer, fit, good family, friends, awesome dog.I'm an almost 30yo f, who has just had a major depressive episode, where I did some pretty stupid things. I have struggled with depression and anxiety for 18 years with varying degrees of success. I'm successful in my job (apparently) however, just recently I noticed all those symptoms coming back, the self doubt, loathing, hatred, anger, frustration and crying. I didn't act on the symptoms 6-8 weeks ago and then they just progressively got worse.I am currently working away, which is a pressure cooker environment, and in a nutshell, I had a few drinks, got into a massive argument with someone, ended up in tears and then ended up self harming because it seemed like a good thing to do at the time. So.... now I have had to take time off work, to pretty much try to sort out my head again. The embarrassment, shame, guilt and additional self loathing of being such a nut case is even more depressing and just frustrating. I'm so concerned that I have totally wrecked my career and I am dreading returning to work, because I know that I'm definitely a nutcase and how am I going to cope with having to show my face there again?i want to know if anyone else ever gets tired of working on their mental health? Does it wear you down to the point where sometimes you just slip back into bad habits, because sometimes you are just too tired, or can't be bothered? I also want to know if anyone else here has violent fits of uncontrollable crying or urges to hit something? Sometimes I want to hurt myself so that I won't feel anything. How do I cope going back to work? And trying to repair the damage that I have done?I'm starting to realise that this is a lifelong condition for me, and I'll always have to filter and work on my thinking. It's a scary thought.So the other thing is I know I'm doing all the right things now, seen my GP and had my meds adjusted, got a new MHCP, booked in to see the psych.What I hate most is that there are people out there, including people on here, who are suffering from far more tragic circumstances, wether it be relationships, hardship, bullying, family issues or health problems, and yet I sit here with no perceptible problems apart from self inflicted misery.Ginger ninja.

Girl_Anachronism Staying strong for others, not myself.
  • replies: 28

So dear Jo asked how I was but I felt bad about taking over her thread. I would have posted on ymy old thread except I promised I would start a new one. Even if today is far from good, I wanted to live up to some promise I made. I'm not good today. I... View more

So dear Jo asked how I was but I felt bad about taking over her thread. I would have posted on ymy old thread except I promised I would start a new one. Even if today is far from good, I wanted to live up to some promise I made. I'm not good today. I am feeling like breaking down due to pressures from my favourite pressure points that I haven't dealt with this past year and I am torn about what to do about it. I want to practice the techniques my psych taugh tme but the monsters are resisiting hard today. Every moment that I don't do them just gives them more strength. That leads to more indecision and...well. This leads to a vicous cycle of thoughts I am trapped in at the moment. Add to that there is housework I should have done but haven't and despite sleeping all day after being sleep deprived, I am still exhausted. If I crawl into bed I will be giving up on getting anything done which is tossing another steak to my monsters. At the same time I don't know if I can do any good not in bed. I can't breakdown though because I am worried about my friend who is extremely ill right now and my husband is not doing great. So I am going to keep an eye on him tonight and take him to the doctors tomorrow. Other people need me to be strong, to be here and present so I am. It all feels like a layer of ice though, underneath which is a heaving ocean. I am tossed around by all these emotions and thoughts. They all feel so real. At the same time all I can think is that right now my good friend is fasting for a life threatening operation to remove a tumour. She has all these real problems and I'm sitting here unable to get up and do the dishes because I'm to weak to even do that. I just keep thinking that if there is any power in the universe, to take the sickness from her. She is such a lovely person, she doesn't deserve what she is going through right now. Give it to me, if someone has to get sick, to die. I'll take it. Just leave her be. None of this I'd feel right about saying out loud. Like I said, I have to be strong for her. I feel it though. Then I feel bad for feeling it, i feel bad for feeling bad... Vicous circles and all that. So yeah, I'm not conflicted and not good today. GA

jodes76 what can I do
  • replies: 2

I'm so depressed right now. Had a fall out with a friend. My daughter is getting harder to control. I don't know if I can go on like this. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I feel like I just want to end it all Normal 0 false false false EN-US JA X-... View more

I'm so depressed right now. Had a fall out with a friend. My daughter is getting harder to control. I don't know if I can go on like this. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I feel like I just want to end it all Normal 0 false false false EN-US JA X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:Cambria; mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} 'beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.'

Christa1 Want to feel better
  • replies: 15

Hello I am new here. Decided to join as I am feeling a bit alone with this illness at the moment. I have struggled with depression for many, many years and have been taking medication for it for the past 10 years, which has enabled me to keep on livi... View more

Hello I am new here. Decided to join as I am feeling a bit alone with this illness at the moment. I have struggled with depression for many, many years and have been taking medication for it for the past 10 years, which has enabled me to keep on living, but not necessarily happily. I am currently on a month's annual leave, and have 2 weeks of it left. This week I have been feeling very flat & have been having persecutory dreams. This is probably in anticipation of having to return to the 'daily grind' soon, which I dread. I have some good things happening in my life at the moment as well, but I don't seem to be able to feel the happiness that these things usually bring. I find that I rarely feel happiness about anything. I feel trapped in this life. It would be good to hear how other people obtain contentedness in their lives. Regards, Christa1

pretty_green_eyes Help with some issues of depression, isolation and no sex
  • replies: 8

I thought I would give this a go since I have nobody to talk to and I feel as though nobody understands. A few years ago I have found out that I have mixed depression. I always thought it was my normal behavior to get upset, have thoughts about suici... View more

I thought I would give this a go since I have nobody to talk to and I feel as though nobody understands. A few years ago I have found out that I have mixed depression. I always thought it was my normal behavior to get upset, have thoughts about suicide etc. My father left when I was 5 and has never really been there. Some say he never should of had children. My mother replaced him with a man only weeks after being separated who abused me. I tried to tell my mother and she accused me of lying. I was abused for over 10 years until he went to lay a hand on my mother. My father was never really there and my mother moved us to a different state so we would be further away from him. In my teenage years I rebelled as I was not allowed to do anything, so I did it. I was constantly drunk, on drugs and having sex with boys. But years later I have left this bad behavior behind. I don’t drink alcohol, don’t smoke and definitely don’t touch drugs. Some of my family members found out about my depression and anxiety and have told me just to get over it. Nobody knows how it feels to be abused unless you have been though it and one does not simply get over it even if the person is now deceased I have seen several psychologists which I feel don't do much, I have tried anti depressants and to be honest make me feel even crazier than I am and I cant drive my car on them. I have a loving partner who I have been with for over a year and two puppies. We have moved 1300 kms away from friends and family leaving me quite isolated. My partner works in mining and works away for two weeks at a time. I would like to meet people but I am not into joining clubs and things as I have anxiety and hate being out of my comfort zone so I work and relax at home. My partner also suffers from depression after losing a house to his previous girlfriend and also being in a lot of debt. Due to his depression he is unable to get an erection and will not seek help for this. We haven’t had sex in over 6 months which is somewhat frustrating and causes our only arguments from. From working two weeks straight my partner is always extremely tired when he arrives home. Sometimes too tired even to kiss me or talk to me causing me to feel unloved I would love some advice on how to deal with these issues Thanks for listening

Shnook Recently Diagnosed, feeling overwhelmed
  • replies: 8

Hi, I have recently been diagnosed with depression and I was hoping to reach out to others that may be able to offer advice or strategies. Through discussions with my GP, I have come to realise that my depression is most likely linked directly to my ... View more

Hi, I have recently been diagnosed with depression and I was hoping to reach out to others that may be able to offer advice or strategies. Through discussions with my GP, I have come to realise that my depression is most likely linked directly to my social anxiety and OCD. I am struggling to fathom these "labels" that I have been given because up until now I always believed it was my personality to be neat and tidy (not a compulsion), and that I was simply going through some rough patches. However after a bit of soul searching it occurred to me that I have probably been suffering from depression and anxiety for quite some time but I never cared to admit it out loud. I am booked in to see my GP again and get a referral to a psychologist. I am looking at this being the first step in dealing with my issues. I have begun taking St.Johns Wort - a natural herb used to help subdue symptoms of low mood and anxiety. I was wondering if any of you have taken this and noticed significant change in mood over time? I am hesitant to take clinical medication for fear of not being able to come off it - also my partner is loathed to me taking such medication so unfortunately I don't have support there. I have also been self-medicating for many years, particularly in social situations, to calm my nerves. I have never used anything stronger than alcohol, but now I have become dependent on it to help me loosen up. Can anyone offer any strategies to help me become calm in unfamiliar social situations without alcohol? I am struggling to think that depression and anxiety are my lot in life. It is difficult for a perfectionist like me to comprehend that my perfectionism is sucking me into a deep, dark hole. I am positive that I can climb my way back out but certain that I cannot do it alone. I hope you can help.

Jo3 appt with GP
  • replies: 12

So today I had an appt with my GP so he could make sure I was okay. Well I wasn't okay. He said he cares about me and wants to see me happy again and not in this state. He said he would be very hurt if i did something to myself. I was sitting there, ... View more

So today I had an appt with my GP so he could make sure I was okay. Well I wasn't okay. He said he cares about me and wants to see me happy again and not in this state. He said he would be very hurt if i did something to myself. I was sitting there, head down not really paying attention to what he was saying. I don't care anymore. I told him I had a plan and we talked about it and now he wants me to see a psychiatrist. And i said no because i don't want to talk about the same stuff over and over again. And then he'll probably give me more medication which i don't want.I told him why can't he just send me away somewhere and he said I am not at that point of being admitted into hospital. But he wants me to see someone. I told him i can't because then i will lose my therapist and i don't want to lose him as i am comfortable with him. But actually last night in session we talked about how bad i thought my depression is and he said i probably should see a psychiatrist as well. Can i see a psych for one visit or do i have to keep going back and now with less hours at work which means less money i don't think i can afford seeing a psych.What are they going to do anyway? I'm not in a very good frame of mind at the moment, my GP wants me to stay busy all weekend and I have to go back on Tuesday to see him. My GP said that my husband is at fault to a point because he doesn't want to acknowledge my depression and doesn't speak to me about it. I know he wants it all to be perfect but it's not perfect.So that was my day today, I am exhausted and fragile at the same time. These thoughts are horrible.Jo

Gingerninja symptoms - feeling poorly
  • replies: 2

Hi people, so, this is my 4th day not working and at home... I'm freaking out because I have not stopped sleeping... Each morning, I resolve to myself that I'm going to go do something. Walk, run, swim...leave the damn house. So today, I managed to l... View more

Hi people, so, this is my 4th day not working and at home... I'm freaking out because I have not stopped sleeping... Each morning, I resolve to myself that I'm going to go do something. Walk, run, swim...leave the damn house. So today, I managed to leave the house... To go to the pharmacy to get my scripts refilled... (I don't think that even counts as it is a 2 min drive) i also forced myself to have a shower after 3 days of no showers... Is that extra bonus points? Anyway, so my first question is: my meds have been adjusted (dosage increased) back to something I have been on previously. I don't know if I'm feeling better, but I do know that I'm feeling crazy lethargic... And sleeping... A lot.... Is that normal? Dizziness... Been feeling so dizzy, but maybe that's just because I have been spending so much time horizontal... (Not in the fun way). Fuzziness...i feel fuzzy, like my whole brain is fuzzy, as if I haven't brushed it with a toothbrush and minty fresh paste for a few days. Do you guys get the same thing after medication adjustment? My Second one is: in an attempt to 'do' something, I thought my SO and I could start on planning the kitchen (probably slightly ambitious). 5 minutes in, I was already irritated and annoyed at him... For no reason. So he's being supportive, trying not to ask too many questions, sitting in silence, but his presence is starting to annoy me... I want him to go out, do something and leave me alone (selfish I know). If I'm getting irritated by my SO who 'understands', I'm going to last about 5 minutes against my work colleagues who are about 1000000000000 times more insufferable. Anyway, this is more of a vent than anything else... But if you've got ideas on the medication thing, drop me a line. I don't really recall having too many probs with side effects before, but then again, I never can remember clearly what it's like from episode to episode. ginger ninja.