Immediate support
Immediate support

Depression

Depression affects people in Australia every day. Share your own story and learn about other member’s experiences with depression.

Start a discussion

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

View the FAQ

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

View the guidelines
Jump to
Start a discussion

Pinned discussions

BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

All discussions

Start a discussion

Mood_Swinger Lost.
  • replies: 3

I don't even know where to start or what I can share/can't share here.... I've always been like this. Except the depression has taken over more in the last few years. I grew up in Foster Care because my mother was in and out of hospital and physicall... View more

I don't even know where to start or what I can share/can't share here.... I've always been like this. Except the depression has taken over more in the last few years. I grew up in Foster Care because my mother was in and out of hospital and physically abused me. To be honest I don't really remember it at all. Mental Illness runs throughout my family. My mother was diagnosed with Borderline Personality, my Grandfather with Bipolar. My Aunt has Bipolar as well while my sister and other relatives suffer from Depression. I spent my entire childhood being diagnosed with everything from ADHD to ODD, Depression and Anxiety.... medicated up to my eyeballs on pysch meds for kids that didn't work. Eventually I grew up and worked out how to best manage my emotions on my own. I settled down and had three children whom I love more than life itself. Really. If I didn't have them, there would be no point anymore. In 2011 something snapped and I had a meltdown. I fell into a deep depression. My anxiety was through the roof. I was losing my mind. The doctor prescribed antidepressents and this brought on what I now realise to be a "hypermanic" episode. I was so happy I could burst, I couldn't sleep at all, I cleaned the walls with bleach at 2am.... After a few months of erratic behaviour I was diagnosed with Bipolar II and we struggled to get my moods under control. in August my mind had had enough and I lost any control. I made an attempt on my life without even putting any though into it. I was hospitalised and tried everything from mood stabilisers to antidepressents, benzos, anti convulsants and anti pyschotics. This was an 18 month struggle until I finally found medication that worked for me. I hated the way it made me feel. I felt no emotion or enjoyment in life. Each day rolled into another and "just was". I no longer see a Psychiatrist or a Psychologist. Nor do I have a regular GP. I've been medication free for 10 weeks now. Gosh some days it's hard and I don't know how on Earth I will ever survive, but then I remember how much I didn't feel when I was medicated and I don't want to go back there. I'm not happy, but at least I can feel how unhappy I am and not just like an empty shell. I can feel anger and outrage. I can feel excitement again. I'm not sure how I will keep going for the rest of my life, but all I know is I don't have a choice. My kids are my life and they need me and that's what I tell myself everyday.

homer_thompson I'm not so sure this is a disorder
  • replies: 3

howdy everyone, i've been lurking around these boards for a couple of months now and i think it's done me some good. It's great to have an outlet for the type of thinking that we depressionados are so prone to, this site is a positive and valuable re... View more

howdy everyone, i've been lurking around these boards for a couple of months now and i think it's done me some good. It's great to have an outlet for the type of thinking that we depressionados are so prone to, this site is a positive and valuable resource for me and i imagine for many of you other posters. i tend to read here far more than i contribute, i'm so interested in all your personal stories and the characters here. i commend you all for the tenacity to persist through difficult periods of life and for the bravery and selfless generosity you invest in sharing yourselves and building this online community.. kudos to you all *one man standing ovation* here, as in RL, i'm disinclined to discuss my life or particular situation in chronology or detailed specifics as seems to be the accepted convention around BB, although i'll always answer a direct question honestly if asked, so feel free to if you are curious. What i'm most interested in at the moment is your feelings on your diagnoses.. i've been diagnosed with a couple of acronyms over the years, as have many of you. i should point out that i have the utmost repect for the medical profession (although slightly less for the medical industry) and hold the medical professionals that I have dealt with in high esteem. What puzzles me a bit is the "D" at the end of all of these acronyms; disorder. In months of reading the stories here, and in my own life I've noticed that, by and large, people's emotional responses are entirely logical and completely justified. I recognise from your posts that many of us feel depressed or anxious or angry. But in the hundreds of posts I have read, there is not one of us, not a single one whose sadness / anger/ confusion is not 100% completely justified. These feelings are the natural, uncontrollable response to the types of extraordinary stress from difficult life events that so many of you describe. So I'm curious, why is a normal, predictable and natural human emotional response to stress so often labelled as a "disorder" in the modern medical paradigm? In addition, a 2007 ABS study showed that 45% of Australian adults self reported having battled with depression or other mental x"illness" in their lives. The number of people who actually have is likely to be much, much larger as negative stigmatisation prevents many from considering the reality. The rates have also grown rapidly since 07. So in a world where more than half of all adults have actually experienced these issues, it would appear that mental illness is now the new order and stoic, emotionless coping all the time is the new disorder. Sounds about right to me. I'm really interested to hear all your thoughts on this issue. . Discuss. (lol, sorry, no it's not an exam question) Wishing everyone a peaceful Easter.

Hawesy Concentration & Memory
  • replies: 2

Do people with depression have trouble concentrating, and remembering?. I am trying to get into the Property Management field, but i am struggling with my memory, and remembering things. I have had several PM jobs, but loose them due to mistakes i ma... View more

Do people with depression have trouble concentrating, and remembering?. I am trying to get into the Property Management field, but i am struggling with my memory, and remembering things. I have had several PM jobs, but loose them due to mistakes i make, with forgetting things. Should i change my career path to something that doesn't need so much remembering important information? I'm 53Yrs old Thanks in advance.....

Girl_Anachronism Uncertainty and fear
  • replies: 52

"Depression is a prison where you are both the suffering prisoner and the cruel jailer." ~Dorothy Rowe How am I today? Afraid and uncertain. I made good progress these past few days. I went shopping most days for this or that. I even did the dishes. ... View more

"Depression is a prison where you are both the suffering prisoner and the cruel jailer." ~Dorothy Rowe How am I today? Afraid and uncertain. I made good progress these past few days. I went shopping most days for this or that. I even did the dishes. TWICE. So why do I feel so bad. I was out doing things. Achieving things. This should make me feel better. So why do I feel this crushing weight on my shoulders now? Why does the thought of next week fill me with dread? I think I know the answer to that one. I have my first volunteer shift on Monday. Just three hours. Three hours I get to spend with cats, volunteering to help out at the cat shelter. Cats make me happy. It's only three hours. That should make me happy. But I'm not. I am afraid. So terribly terribly afraid. My monsters keep whispering to me about what could go wrong. They keep whispering about how I'll screw it up. Normally I have at least a little strength to fight it off, or at least shrug it off and let the social anxiety of missing this appointment carry me through those three hours. I look inside and all I find is emptiness. These past few days, I almost felt like a person again. Hell I can shorten that sentence. I almost FELT. Where did that person go? II saw her, glimpses of her in the edges of my vision. I can't even see her now, where did she go? It hurts too much to hope. Hope should be a big positive, glowing thing but in my mind it is but a flickering candle flame. I don't dare com out of the dark towards that light because I can't trust it. It might go out any minute. I'll be left in the dark again, the dark I know so well. Worse, I'll be left in the dark with the memories of what that light was, what it could have been. I'm not sure why I am posting. I just felt all these thoughts, like a pressure inside my head. I had to let it out somewhere. It's chaos in my head at the moment, voices shouting over voices; faces appearing in the crowd only to disappear a split second later. I don't know if I'm making sense. I don't know.... I wanted to apologise for not posting much lately. I just can't hear over all the voices, to get one clear line of thought sometimes. And then there is the effort of coming on here and pushing all these keys to get it out. Then the waiting, the anxiety as I hope it gets posted. I hope someone sees. The fear that something will go wrong and it will disappear and I'll have to type the thing out again, which seems all too hard. So you see I am having trouble helping myself right now. I don't know how to help others. It' like offering a hand down to help someone up and over a cliff edge. I don't have the strength in my arms when the ground is crumbling beneath my own feet. If I only had a firm footing, I could help pull you up. I could do something good. I could do something. GA

CJ28 Feel like this massive cloud follows me and I just bring everyone down
  • replies: 3

Hi all, I am really confused, and I don't know what to do.... I feel like there is no one that I can turn to any more. The doctor that I was seeing was brilliant, but she went back to Ireland and I haven't been able to find another doctor who seems t... View more

Hi all, I am really confused, and I don't know what to do.... I feel like there is no one that I can turn to any more. The doctor that I was seeing was brilliant, but she went back to Ireland and I haven't been able to find another doctor who seems to understand. I don't really have any friends (it's seems if you stop using Facebook people stop talking to you altogether), and I have one friend who I used to see on a regular basis, but because I am in this deep hole that I can't seem to get out of, she hasn't even spoken to me in a few weeks. I am going overseas with this friend and another in a few weeks (trip was booked last August), but now I don't want to go. I feel like this massive cloud follows me and I just bring everyone down. I am so sick of being like this. It's been 2 years. I have thought about the unthinkable to the point of making sure that all of my financial affairs were in order, I've thought about just driving off somewhere and disappearing to somewhere where no one knows who I am and just cut all ties with home and work.... I don't know what to do. I have a good job (although extremely frustrating), and I have to put on an act at work that everything is fine. I spend every minute in my room, never leaving the house. I don't want to go to overseas now, I don't want to go to work, I don't want to leave my bed. I am sick of fighting and feeling this way, and it seems like no one understands. Even the friend I see doesn't understand, she just seems to think I will just snap out of it, and I wish I could, bit I just can't. I really don't know what to do. I'm over this well and truly. I want my old self back but I think that person is now gone forever.

Over_It1 I've always lived by the harden up rule, but it's not working anymore
  • replies: 12

Life, I'm not sure if it is worth the hassle to even get up just so life can kick you down again. No work, (dont want to anymore) bills killing me (dont answer the phone anymore) just wanna hide in this dark hole and never leave. I just want to be ha... View more

Life, I'm not sure if it is worth the hassle to even get up just so life can kick you down again. No work, (dont want to anymore) bills killing me (dont answer the phone anymore) just wanna hide in this dark hole and never leave. I just want to be happy again .... even for half a day

Neil_1 Here I am again!! Life is great - NOT !!
  • replies: 30

What’s it all for. Go to work to do aimless stuff. I work out at the gym – continual working out, but am I getting any bigger? Doubt it. Injured my bicep in November and it’s still giving me grief. I’ve stopped one of the really enjoyable things in l... View more

What’s it all for. Go to work to do aimless stuff. I work out at the gym – continual working out, but am I getting any bigger? Doubt it. Injured my bicep in November and it’s still giving me grief. I’ve stopped one of the really enjoyable things in life (having beers at night) and this is giving me grief as well. I mean if it wasn’t for my fat stomach, there’d be no need to go off it. Feel tired so much – and I thought it was just in the morning, but now it’s getting to me during the arves as well now. Am a hopeless joke of a father to my son. Thank goodness that our daughter is a ripper! But then she's turned out that way largely to her Mum's influence. But our son just frustrates the hell out of me and makes me so sad and mad. He won't go to bed early - that's a source of aggravation. I’ve stuffed up so badly. I doubt there’d be another household that would be like ours – where our son basically gets everything that he wants. And grumbles a lot of the time too. But that's just another balloon of my depression. Want to just lie down in bed. Also have a sore right glute/hamstring attachment; and also sore lower back, due to me being a 'paper boy' every Tuesday evening. But yeah, these are just some of my stressors at the moment - tears still won't come - but I find I'm getting mad and angry INSIDE me; that it's all balling up into a tightness but it won't explode and if it did, I don't know in what form it would come out. I feel like a sham as well - I post to others and reply and support, but all the time I'm feeling just a joke of a person who has my own battles. But then I turn it around and think, well at least posting here is possibly one of the things that I can do that is perhaps 'right'. I mean, the amount of feedback I've had from you wonderful people has shown me that. But with all these stressors at the moment and the massive question is: what’s it all for?? Where is the next smile going to come from? But really, will a smile make all that much of a difference?? What do I want?????? I don’t know – not to be continually stuck in an office everyday of the week. Not to be injured. Well, neither of these will ever come true – well one will but that’s so far off in the future that it’s not worth thinking about and the other one would be if I stopped one of my biggest passions in life – to work out. So the clock ticks on, the day progresses and the endless cycle just continues on. Thanx for reading. Neil

Breaking_Bad Complex PTSD, Bipolar type 2, Borderline Personality Disorder. This is my diagnosis. Anyone else the same?
  • replies: 1

I'm just reaching out. My diagnosis has floored me. Medication is mad. So much of it. I stopped taking my medication for 3 days. My doctor today said I look like a heroin addict and that it was a very stupid thing for me to do. 3 days from regular me... View more

I'm just reaching out. My diagnosis has floored me. Medication is mad. So much of it. I stopped taking my medication for 3 days. My doctor today said I look like a heroin addict and that it was a very stupid thing for me to do. 3 days from regular me post diagnosis to physically unwell, to the point of nearly requiring hospitalisation. Back on Meds full swing. Feel so much better already.

Cassie3000 These past few months I've gone back into a rut
  • replies: 1

Hi. I'm not sure if I'm looking for answers or just somewhere to express myself. for the past 3 or 4 months I feel like I've gone back to a place where I was 10 years ago. I'm not sure if it's a result of whats happening around me or not- I just feel... View more

Hi. I'm not sure if I'm looking for answers or just somewhere to express myself. for the past 3 or 4 months I feel like I've gone back to a place where I was 10 years ago. I'm not sure if it's a result of whats happening around me or not- I just feel either devoid of emotion or really sad. about 10 years ago I was hospitalised in a youth psychiatric ward as depressed. I had a horrible experience at the Austin hospital and I don't want to repeat it. Although I've managed over the years (all be it at times I have struggled) these past few months I've gone back into a rut. I guess I have all of the tele tale signs/ feeling sad/anxious, little enjoyment, no sex drive, ect. in particular, because of a few missed job opportunities and a lot of pressure at work and study along with sons arguments with family I'm slowly going back to my black, helpless place where I'm worthless and where moone understands me. its so hard for me to see a doctor as im pretty disillusioned with the whole system. Does anyone have any ideas of how I can stop myself going down that slippery slope again?

tc Depression and eating disorder
  • replies: 6

I'm new to BB and have been reading your stories and comments for a couple of weeks. So many of the things you write about resonate deeply within me, and I feel less isolated. Does anyone experience disordered/out of control eating or restraining fro... View more

I'm new to BB and have been reading your stories and comments for a couple of weeks. So many of the things you write about resonate deeply within me, and I feel less isolated. Does anyone experience disordered/out of control eating or restraining from eating behaviour? Since childhood (am 55) my eating pattern and weight has been unhealthy - going from skinny to fat - being an anorexic teenager, young adult - then into bulimia (restraining/exercising) for most of my adult life. Several times, over the years, especially during times of extreme distress/depression - my restraining pattern turned into bingeing, like a form of self-soothing or comfort. Most recently, life has become overwhelmingly challenging and the binge eating pattern has returned. I've lost control and feel completely ashamed and repulsed by myself, my body and my eating. I've withdrawn from most of my friends and just want to stay in my apartment, watch tv and hide. I was proud of myself when I was in control of my eating and exercising daily. My body was lean, I could feel my bones. It's a tremendous feeling - a high - and very much in-sync with who I am - a perfectionist. When things look to be in order - house perfect, appearance 'perfect' (not that it ever is!) - life feels safe, life makes sense and I feel in control. That has all gone. I know that even when we feel "in control", the feeling is largely illusion, however, now the illusion has gone. I've been without work for almost two years, live alone, divorced - for the second time, and have a mortgage. This is especially agonising as I had left work for full time uni, gained a degree, worked for a time in a related field - and now am in a worse position than I was before uni. (trying not to use too may "I's", sorry!!!) This is deteriorating into a ramble. My thoughts are confused. Have been on antidepressant for about 15 years and found they help to stabilise my mood and outlook. For the last 18mths or so, this hasn't been the case and I've become increasingly depressed, withdrawn, confused. Self-confidence has vanished. Self-esteem has also vanished. I see myself as a failure in most areas of my life. There are two people in my life who support, accept and love me, despite the depression. They are a priceless blessing. They don't really understand depression, and I often feel embarrassed and incredibly selfish in discussing my situation with them. Often, the best strategy for me is "cave dwelling" - laying low, staying at home, withdrawing from contact. That way, I don't have to wear a mask (which is SO exhausting), explain myself or expose anyone to my dark mood. Yesterday was a particularly bad day for uncontrolled eating. Today I feel physically and emotionally sick, drained and disgusted. This cycle has caught me in an iron grip. This is the first time I've talked about it. I would be unbearably ashamed if anyone recognised me or knew about my problem. I disgust myself. I have sort support, and hopefully will be commencing soon. Can't happen soon enough! Hopefully this makes some sort of sense to someone. It may strike a chord with you, if you battle similar demons. Reading stories of others here on BB has helped me to feel less isolated. If some of my rambling helps one person, it makes the effort worthwhile Whatever you are facing today, I hope you find the strength, peace and resilience you need to get through ...... TC