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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Fmlsad Stuck and alone in a small ball
  • replies: 7

Hi everyone, I have suffered from depression and anxiety for 15+ years, starting as a teenager. I have always managed for the most part, though lately it is getting the better of me. I am a single mum, with a very lacking ex who does not make time fo... View more

Hi everyone, I have suffered from depression and anxiety for 15+ years, starting as a teenager. I have always managed for the most part, though lately it is getting the better of me. I am a single mum, with a very lacking ex who does not make time for the kids, nor helps me with them and does not help financially, so I don't get a break. I have no family - except a mother in law that is 1400kms away - and she has her own issues, so I really hate to burden her. I want to join some groups, but find it hard to find kid friendly, low cost options. so here I am, hoping to find some like minded people to rally with and talk to when I feel so low and just need human interaction - without the online chats who just seem to want to talk sex all the time - and maybe lead to some RL friendships. I have separated in the last few months - after 11 years - it was my decision and I was quite happy about it, but he is very good at manipulating me and with my depression I can be very easily led, hence his mind games have sent me into a downward spiral, I really was in a nice place, getting my life in order, reaching out to new social circles, however now I just want to roll into a ball and not move - I know it's just the depression, but I just can't function or get past it.

Lisa1989 Looking for advice for overcoming feelings of depression
  • replies: 9

Hi, I am 26 years old. I have not been officially diagnosed with depression, but identify with a lot of its symptoms. I have problems with yo yo dieting and binge eating, to the point where it sometimes makes me ill. On the weekends I don't feel like... View more

Hi, I am 26 years old. I have not been officially diagnosed with depression, but identify with a lot of its symptoms. I have problems with yo yo dieting and binge eating, to the point where it sometimes makes me ill. On the weekends I don't feel like doing anything but going to bed or watching TV. I have a job that can sometimes be stressful and it gets to me so much that I become a blubbering mess! I am married, have a new, beautiful house, and a pretty good job. I shouldn't feel the way I do. My husband tries to make me feel better and tries to understand it but mostly it just makes him frustrated and helpless. In turn this makes me feel guilt for bringing him down with me. I have seen two different psychologists, each time helping me to deal with different issues. They both suggested that I take up a new hobby. But each time I think of doing it I have no motivation. I don't want to feel like this anymore. I would really appreciate some advice on how to not allow depression to take hold.

Resilence I don't see my smile anymore
  • replies: 4

I use to always be a happy person and was called smiley before but now I don't see myself even looking at myself in the mirror anymore. I've been depressed since I've been 16 and now I'm 24 I suffer from anxiety and I've finally decided to take medic... View more

I use to always be a happy person and was called smiley before but now I don't see myself even looking at myself in the mirror anymore. I've been depressed since I've been 16 and now I'm 24 I suffer from anxiety and I've finally decided to take medication to help me and so far it has been helping me little by little each day. I see a psychologist every now and then but feel like I always need to vent ALOT because I'm such an emotional person and I feel so much better when it is out. This drives me crazy as a person. I feel like my personality as a person makes me crazy at times its like I can't be happy anymore. I'm a social person and I feel so depressed all the time when I don't get enough interaction in my day or when I'm left alone for a couple hours in my day... I hate it. I hate being alone. I hate living in this isolated area and being away from people. When I don't talk to someone in my day it drives me crazy I just want to drive somewhere and TALK. I've been very confused about which career to do for many years now and I struggle making decisions and anxious about making wrong choices. I've done a few different careers and I don't want to be a failure again. I either get bored from the job or feel like I need more talking in the job. Every job I've done I've legit hated and it has made me depressed all the time. I sit at tafe and I feel so costriphobic being in a classroom all day and sitting on my ass.. I hate it.. I hate studying and have never liked school.. I'm not enjoying tafe and I don't find it fun at all.. I hate it so much but I do it because I'd rather be depressed in class then be depressed sitting at home. I will be worse. I'm so outgoing, hands on and I value my freedom heaps. Is anyone out there feel like me? Can anyone relate to this? My personality drives me crazy! I feel like my heart is a ghost town.. Forever depressed and I never find anything I'm passionate about or LOVE. How long do I have to be miserable for seriously?

Vita16 Lost...what next??
  • replies: 5

So, what next? I have been on medication for 4 months and feel better for it aside from the side-effects. I have seen my psychologist every fortnight as well which has been challenging, uncomfortable, rewarding, safe, and even a couple of funny momen... View more

So, what next? I have been on medication for 4 months and feel better for it aside from the side-effects. I have seen my psychologist every fortnight as well which has been challenging, uncomfortable, rewarding, safe, and even a couple of funny moments thrown as well. Thing is I don't feel as down or sad as I used to, but don't feel happy either - am not sure what that means. Therapy seems to be going well, but I'm left wondering what next? She has progressed me to mindfulness - ie being the moment be it work, family, friends or by myself > am trying, but it is hard when I'm used to going at life at a million miles an hour. Have been compliant with my self-care plan - exercise, rest, sleep, etc. Work has been ok, reduced hours to 45-50/week, but am finding motivation problematic. Have never been one to procrastinate, but seem quite good at it now. Breaking things down, lists etc are getting me through. I know that things will improve with time; I get it is ok not to be ok; I get that that if we're a magic solution to depression someone would have provided it by now. But when I was undiagnosed, miserable, and at risk at least I had that...now I just feel like a rudderless ship. Just re-reading this post I'm rambling a lot - sorry, not very readable, but maybe a reflection of where I am. Thanks for reading Vita

Pearse3 Not too sure what I'm going through. Need a bit of help
  • replies: 6

Hi, for about a year now at least once a week I wake up and just feel like everything is a effort and I get really frustrated with everything even if it is just someone walking past me. Sometimes it gets so bad that I flip out on my partner and start... View more

Hi, for about a year now at least once a week I wake up and just feel like everything is a effort and I get really frustrated with everything even if it is just someone walking past me. Sometimes it gets so bad that I flip out on my partner and start getting physically aggressive and then after the fight I would go to our room and ball by eyes out for at least half an hour. Have no idea what is happening to me to make me do this, need to understand what it could be.

Nickname_9656A407-7ADC-46 chronic depression and feeling paralyzed
  • replies: 2

I've had depression as far back as I can remember. It gets a bit better at times and then really bad. At the moment it's ok just paralyzing. I can't seem to do anything, stuck in the same position day after day. I try to better my life but the only t... View more

I've had depression as far back as I can remember. It gets a bit better at times and then really bad. At the moment it's ok just paralyzing. I can't seem to do anything, stuck in the same position day after day. I try to better my life but the only thing I seem to be able to do at the moment is walk which gives some relief but then I have to go home and can't go for another walk until the next day. I try to do productive stuff at home but it seems pointless. Too hard. I have four kids aged 10 to 5 months and my partner is unemployed and at home 24/7. I think he's depressed too but won't admit it. I need to learn to drive, need to bring in money but it all seems like such a heavy weight I end up just pottering around the house until I collapse into bed at night waiting for my walk the next day so I can feel a bit better again. It's too hard to see a psychologist at the moment and when I think about going back on antidepressants I consider the side effects like persistent tiredness I get when on them and little relief with the down mood. I've tried a number of them and only had one with any good effect but still has the negative side effects. What are my other options? Is there a way I can pull up out of this without medication and psychotherapy? I'm so tired of feeling like everything is too hard and too much.

kanga_brumby Not shoor where to go to from here
  • replies: 4

I have depression for years. I have tried to talk to my family and friends. Now most of my family ignore me , all my friends have moved and not given me there new addresses. One who really understood because she was going through similar stuff. Both ... View more

I have depression for years. I have tried to talk to my family and friends. Now most of my family ignore me , all my friends have moved and not given me there new addresses. One who really understood because she was going through similar stuff. Both of us would be there for each other. Unfortunately passed away. I found out her story and supported her and she me. Now I don't have anyone when I need to vent to vent off steam. I don't wish to lay it on my children.

Wild_ I thought I was through the worst of it, but I feel like I am about to slip backwards...
  • replies: 7

Hi, I'm new here. I have depression. I feel that there is not one person in my life that understands how I feel, and why I can't just "get over it." So here I am - now surrounded by you, who understands. So first of all, thanks. Quick background. My ... View more

Hi, I'm new here. I have depression. I feel that there is not one person in my life that understands how I feel, and why I can't just "get over it." So here I am - now surrounded by you, who understands. So first of all, thanks. Quick background. My depression became significantly worse about 8-10 months ago. I was at a workplace with a toxic culture where I was the new person, and the hierarchy said that I should be told I wasn't good enough for years before I got a permanent job (I was on very short term contracts). I know its not personal, its just the industry, but I couldn't keep taking the rejections and the negativity, but I definitely couldn't make it known to those at work, so I slid. I slid into a depression where I hated going to work. I was constantly told that I should be happy because, after all, I had the dream job. My boyfriend at the time kept saying he understood, but in reality he had no idea. If I was having a bad day, he would say that I'm inconsiderate because I'm not thinking about how he feels when I'm being difficult. I loved him, so of course, I told myself that it was my fault. I told myself that he was really supportive, because at times he did try and make me feel better, but in the long run, it wasn't good for me at all. I have two close friends. One is extremely kind and although she hasn't had depression so doesn't fully understand, she is always willing to listen . The other one is very judgemental about mental illness (I watched how she treated another friend with severe depression), so I don't really talk to her about this. I do have one other friend who suffers from anxiety who I am very grateful for. But these friendships have their limits. Fast forward. I am feeling better than 4 months ago, but I know I'm not there yet. The short-term contract work-I am now without a contract (no guarantees when the next contract will be), living in a home with a controlling sister (who does not understand depression, and unfortunately not willing to try), and a mum who has had mental health issues for 20+ years (who understands, however imagine us if we both have really bad days on the same day). I can't leave because I don't have a stable income. I am terrified that too much time home alone will allow me to get in my own head. To spiral backwards. To slip back into day-in, day-out, curled up on the couch feeling completely worthless. There are things to do, but I'm finding it hard to motivate myself.

Bluererer Go it alone or go along? Family is offering 'solutions' not support.
  • replies: 2

Hi all! This is a very condensed version of what has happened but I am in my 50's and had to leave work after being bullied. I got a small payout but after 18+ months not working, I have used up every bit of savings and am now living day to day finan... View more

Hi all! This is a very condensed version of what has happened but I am in my 50's and had to leave work after being bullied. I got a small payout but after 18+ months not working, I have used up every bit of savings and am now living day to day financially. I have tried working manual jobs because I don't feel like I could cope working in the industry I was in, but my body just cant handle it for long periods of time. I have set up a small business but the income is very inconsistent. One close family member has discommunicated me (is that a word?) after I went through a paranoid/delusional period which was more painful than I ever imagined and has given my family and friends their version of what my 'problem' is. So without consultation or discussing my needs with me or even my diagnosis, they arranged to bring me 'home' and offered to buy me a ticket. But this would mean giving up my very cheap accommodation, and my dog, the few friends I have and I would have no means of financial support. And now I am feeling a bit pressured because every time I talk to them I am asked if I miss home, I get a barrage of family pics and I get the impression they think I'm just mismanaging my life rather than coping with PTSD and severe depression (which is what the professionals say), not to mention my physical limitations which are also being minimised. I have worked so hard to stay out of hospital and have joined a support group, take my dog and therefore myself for walks, and generally am trying my hardest to get better. So I feel that this attitude is keeping me down rather than picking me up. Nobody asks how I am doing, or what will help, and conversations are cut short if I ever mention my mental health and steered back to general safe subjects. On the other hand, I have reconnected with a dear friend who is incredibly supportive. I'm now wondering if it is my depression that is making me think this way, or would it be better to avoid my family for a while?

Housegirl How do you shake it off?
  • replies: 5

Hi, I have a great life; a wonderful husband, kids, job I love, house I love, pets. From the outside I could look like I have it all. I'm so exhausted from battling the negative emotions and feelings of not being liked/accepted. I've done so much cou... View more

Hi, I have a great life; a wonderful husband, kids, job I love, house I love, pets. From the outside I could look like I have it all. I'm so exhausted from battling the negative emotions and feelings of not being liked/accepted. I've done so much counselling and self work through my life I know all the things I should be saying to myself and deep down I know how loved I am by my family. Why can't I stop these feelings of worthlessness?? it was pounded in to me by my mother - I'm worthless, I have a terrible personality, it's a wonder I have any friends... I cannot overcome these fundamental beliefs. I can make friends fine but can't seem to hold them. I think I'm too needy, overshare, clingy? Then every time I get dropped by a friend all the things my mother told me become reinforced. I beat myself up for ages about what I did wrong, how it was my fault. I wish I could just shake it off. i am currently feeling so worthless, disliked and ganged up on. How do you get all the mantras/work you've done to actually change your patterns? I'm feeling so hopeless.

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